I'm not against working Mums but this is going too far.

[Intefering]

Name changed regular.

A friend of mine has 3 young children with a partner in the military. He is due to leave in 3 or 4 years time I think.

Said friend has told me that she will be re-joining the Navy when her youngest starts reception in 2 years time, several reasons why, money issues, she's worried that after 8 years being a SAHM she will be unemployable, she loves the Navy and nothing else career wise interests her.

AIBU to suggest that this is a ridiculous idea?! I doubt she's considered all the time away from her DC, how her DH will cope picking up the slack at home on his own. Yes she may have loved the Navy but that's behind her and she should concentrate on her responsibilities as a wife and mother.

I'm trying to advise her as her friend but I can't see past her incredible selfishness, how can she have all these kids just to abandon them? She's worried that in 18 years time when all the kids have left home she'll be in a miserable job having watched life pass her by, I really want to tell her that she should of thought of that before getting pregnant.

AIBU and if I am can someone tell me how this will work because I really can't see it.

I reckon curryfreak is the OP come back as a namechange to "support" her own views

My chiidren long to the offspring of the mothers "who try to buy their kids affections with fancy holidays and the latest must-have". Sadly they have to make do with fairly normally deprived lives. Poor kids.

I wondered that too toccat

I am obivously deprived as I don't have a laptop!

awww Porto, have a glass of wine - it'll make everything right in the world again

or alternately get your arse back to work and stop updating your FB during boring presentations

I'm glad for you portifino, but i'll tell you what i think it comes down to,- children like their parents being at home, mum or dad, at least for part of the day. Ask any child what they would prefer, even older ones and i'm talking 12/13 here, and they will choose going home from school to a parent, or carer over a childminder nursery any day.
You might want to work for a myriad of reasons, and good on you. However, many parents delude themselves in to thinking that they are working for the good of their children. They are not. They are working because they want to, fullfill some need within themselves. Why we cant all admit that is beyond me!

You've surveyed all the children in the world have you curryfreak? Or just the UK?

Actually Curry - my DS1 frequently asks me when I'm going to get a job, and when I do get one (he thinks I can walk into the job centre and just "pick on up" - ahh the innocence of yoof) he wants to go to the same after school club as his friends (not much choice there mate there's only a handful of after school clubs in the town anyhow).

Actually every time we walk past the job centre (which is fairly frequent as it's on the way to town) he mentions it.

Nope - wrong again Curry.

I work because I have to. No other fecker gonna pay my bills.

Would much rather -sit on my fat arse petite derierre and eat chocolate all day

i dont have to work.i chose to.no compulsion to work whatsoever

Off you go then fudge.!Notice you didn't disagree with me voilethill.Have i touched a nerve!

oh and when I was in my teens (well from aged 12) and came home from boarding school I'd often get a taxi from the train station and let myself into an empty house.

OMG I LOVED that time, I'd stick the TV on (we'd only just got one for the first time in my life), make a coffee and sandwich and sit down and watch shite until my mum came back - was fab

no - I shall be looking for work from next year.

Sadly I can't explain to DS1 the reasons that are stopping me right now, they are too much for him to have to try and get his head around at 9yrs old

Actually, my own children have very happy memories of the nursery they attended. When they went on to school, they asked to go to the after-school club on days I wasn't even working sometimes, because it was a nice bit of 'down time' with their friends before coming home. And once they were old enough to come home unsupervised, they have all enjoyed having time in the house before me or DH get home. So count my children out of your homespun theory curryfreak. Fortunately some of us have children who have such positive, loving attachments to both parents that they don't need to be velcroed to one parent 24/7 to be able to function.

Surely this is a wind-up?? Are you the DH?

violet - DS1 walks himself home from the junior school - usually arrives home 20 minutes after the infant school has finished (both are really close to home).

I tend to spend an awful long time chatting in the playground and quite often recently have got home to find DS1 standing on the door step.

I suggested getting him his own front door key so that when it happens (and it tends to happen a lot in the nicer weather ) he can let himself in until I got home.

He wanted to go to town there and then to get one cut LOL

Yep, touched a nerve. Leaving this thread now,- it's boring!

ermm what nerve do you think you've touched?

I'm a SAHM have been for 95% of my children's lives.

curryfreak - go and play with interfering.
Or is that playing with yourself ?

May as well stop ALL girls from going to school beyond the age of 11 eh? Silly things; wanting jobs or (gasp) a career after getting pregnant

And a family... jointly deciding how to run their family (
shock horror)

Gosh. A father deciding to retire with a big fat pension and be a SAHD

Pppff. Only really came back because I have decided Toccata is Miss Sensible and therefore dresses like Miss Marple (surely?)

Place your bets now as to what name interfering pops up with next

haha caramel - does Miss Marple wear bubblegum pink converse??? - if so - yup that's me

well if she's interfered with the curryfreak I guess we'll have diarrhoea next

because she'll be spouting more shite