To be furious that DD was alone when I came home??

[ApocalypseCheese]

DD has asd and a statement which covers her from the moment she leaves home to the moment she gets home. IE she is never unsupervised for her own safety.

Got home from shopping earlier and the poor thing was sat on the sofa panicing, one phonecall to the school reveals there were hardly any kids on the transport bus so dd was home quite a lot earlier than usual.
The front door wasnt locked as i've lost my front door key, dp had left for work earlier and left it open for me/the builders.

Not good enough, these people are trusted to care for my child when i'm not there, heads will roll in the morning

I think you you were quite nasty initially. Then you changed tack because people weren't agreeing 100%

We leave our door unlocked, we live in a safe area but it was a comedy of errors with the amount of things that just happened to go wrong in the first place.

'They should be thankful that they don't have to worry about the safety of their children as much as us and others do as they get older.'

Agreed, although the fact that my DS is big and dark and looks menacing means that a lot of potential trouble walks round him.

Jess, there are no ins and outs, the op is perfectly clear.

Unfortunately there will always be those who seemingly need to know the ins and outs of a fart in order to understand things which don't directly apply to them

A lot of education is explaining the bleeding obvious.

Not much went wrong tho

I lost my key and the bus was late, didnt occur to me my child would be dropped off early If i'd have been forewarned, i'd have asked a neighbour to wait in but didnt get that opportunity.

I was shirty in response to a lot of vileness, what's good for the goose is good for the gander etc

JesusChristOnABike, my patience has been sorely tested on this

They should of contacted you to say they were going to be early though did you not say they had your mobile number,my ds's escort ALWAYS phones if their going to be early or late in the morning or evening he's even been known to phone the night before to let us know I'll miss him next year when ds finishes school he's fantastic.

OP has been called neglectful on here based on nothing. It's insulting and ridiculous.

They should have contacted-but how early were they?
I´m not sure-did I read correctly that they were 10 minutes early?

If so, why would they bother to phone to say that?

OP-I hope you have sorted it out with the escorts & that they understood your concerns-and took them seriously!

Also, re OP leaving her door open/unlocked-there were builders in the house weren´t there?

Yeah they have my number, it's over and done with now, and hopefully lessons have been learned.

diddl, 10 minutes is quite a lot earlier, when you consider for the past 6 years she has been dropped off no later than 3.20.

The builders obviously werent in the house at the time, tho they'd been in and out the house all day (finishing up) they came back later on, not long after the football finished unsurprisingly

Well I don´t consider 10 mins a lot earlier tbh.

But that´s neither here nor there.

Did the escort tell you why they hadn´t "handed over"?

And just as an aside, it would never have occurred to me that anything might be different due to the footy!!

ROFLMAO that I would change my mind because I wanted to fit in...........that would be a first for me

"A lot of education is explaining the bleeding obvious."

AC - you may think the OP was very clear, but others don't . I for one don't have experience of SN children, and wouldn't have interpreted your post about needing constant supervision as meaning literally person-to-person handover or your DD as needing to be fully in the presence of an adult at all times. So a bit of an education for me as the thread progessed, but not entirely accurate to say that the OP was clearer for those without the specific insight.

Doesn't mean you should always post in SN, just that if you post outside it, you might need to explain more than if posting in SN.

Have read whole thread with alternate and expressions.

AC YADNBU.

I dropped off a 4 year old to her home the other day - her elder sister came to the (unlocked) front door and said 'daddy is doing a poo and mummy's at the shops'.

Of course I waited until their dad came to the door (about 5 mins, I guess he was reading in there).

A handover is a handover. An adult is responsible for a child until it has been acknowledged by another adult that the period of responsibility is over.

God you must have got the fright of your life when you saw your poor DD alone - I hope you are both ok.

AC - I like you!!

i can not believ people still say the op is bu.
dd always comes home after 4, if she suddenly appeared at 3.50. I would faint be surprised. I would also expect her escort to have rung me, and if not there waited with her.

'Ie she should never be unsupervised at any time for her own safety' How the hell could that be any clearer ??

Thank you Animation, I like me too

I did Beachcomber, not as much as poor dd tho, she said she thought i'd died and wasnt ever coming back. Poor sod, she's fine now tho.

I'm surprised that people needed more information than the op gave to read the situation correctly. As I said above, I have no experience at all of children with sn. All I know is what I have gleaned from the likes of Riven, 2shoes etc and it was pretty obvious to me. So saying you didn't understand what the situation was is a cover up for the fact that you probably skimmed the op and jumped in with both feet.

"DD has asd and a statement which covers her from the moment she leaves home to the moment she gets home. IE she is never unsupervised for her own safety"

Pretty clear really.

AC - in my mind, supervision means that I might be able to pop upstairs or out to the garden for 10 mins with my DD still downstairs or inside. Whereas in your situation it seems that 10 mins without an adult in the same room is not a possibility. So, actually, not that clear at all. What you meant was that your DD should not be alone anywhere at any time for her own safety. Which is not the same thing to many people.

Hope she's OK now, and I didn't think you were being unreasonable, just not very clear!

there will always be those who seemingly need to know the ins and outs of a fart in order to understand things which don't directly apply to them

Alouiseg - still no chance of you apologising/ retracting your vile comments re 'bespoke door to door service' and 'sense of entitlement'?

Nothing the OP has said or done could possibly justify such abhorrent statements, and in proudly reiterating your conviction that the OP was at fault you have conveniently and in very cowardly fashion ignored the upset you yourself have caused. Very big and clever. Wonder if the people with you at your school summer fair would be proud of your sentiments

"All I know is what I have gleaned from the likes of Riven, 2shoes etc "

and for those that haven't "gleaned" information from the likes of those posters, or like myself have had lots of online conversations with Riven and 2shoes.......which usually revolve around benefits or religion (generally speaking statements don't come up in either of those discussions)

this is all going round in circles.

I honestly don't understand, given that the OP mentioned ASD (and even if you aren't opted in for SN, there is plenty of mention of some of the issues this can bring across all the boards) and also said "cannot be left unsupervised for her own safety

surely this does not mean, to anyone (given this is clearly a school age child we are talking about, not a toddler who might get up to mischief) "oh I thought that was the same as pottering about in the garden while she is watching tv - youknow, lightly supervised" or similar.

OP was clearly furious her d had been left.

She said her dd has SN, and that she cannot be left alone safely

HOW can it be overlooked?

FWIW, I do have a SN daughter, but I can leave her alone in typical small child loose supervision - I am often mning doing housework elsewhere while she is pottering about with dd2. but I understood what was meant, despite this not being my life.

and apart from that - if any of you used a taxi service for a young child, would you be happy that they let them out on the roadside, and let them run in without checking there was the relevant adult there ot meet? SN aside, just about everyone would be annoyed that whoever was bringing them home hadn'tbothered ot check.

No, YANBU. Frankly, you could have been late because you were comatose in the pub, and the driver would still have been wrong to drop off an ASD child without making a handover to an adult.

If a child wasn't picked up at school, the staff might shout and scream and call social services, but they would stay with the child. My only experience is of Infants, but at the end of the day all children are handed over to a recognised carer. The school must be notified if somebody else is collecting. The same level of care should apply to young children/SN children on a bus.

For all the driver knew, the front door was open because the house was being burgled.

On the other hand, if nothing else, this thread shows that people don't all have common sense. Are there guidelines for the driver, or are they just assuming that he/she has more knowledge of SN than some of the posters on this thread?

Lordy - your poor DD to have thought you were never coming back.

I do not have any experience with SN children but it seems pretty obvious that supervised means just that. Fair enough if people didn't 'get' that but maybe they could have checked before jumping in and making silly judgements.

This is just why it is important to have these sorts of issues not just confined to SN topics - so we can all learn something.

This thread has been very enlightening in more ways than one. Those who see the AIBU section as an opportunity to judge and attack without trying to understand are very tiresome. AC you have been very patient I think and deserve some apologies.