to not want people to wear shoes over my lovely oak floor

[Carameli]

we have since we moved been doing some major renovations to our house. It is now at an end and as we put really nice oak flooring in the living room and dining room we decided to have a no shoes rule in the house. Lots of my friends do this and it works fine.
I also lived in Finland for a few years where it is the norm and expected that you take off your shoes when you go into someone's house.
My stumbling block is my mum and dad who refuse to and have said they will sit in the kitchen rather than take off their shoes.
I love my parents dearly and but feel so upset over this. Have just had an email from my mum saying she does not know when my father will want to visit us again. What am I meant to say. My worry is he comes in with a stone on his shoe and we end up with a big scratch on the wood or I am not ale to invite them over for dinner etc etc(thinking ahead to Christmas etc etc birthdays)

arrrgggg. feel so frustrated.

Ok, stupid was maybe too extreme. But I think people don't look smart or dignified in sock feet. If I was lounging on the couch without shoes on and someone rang the bell I would probably pop my shoes on before I answered the door. And if I'm wearing slippers then I feel like I should be lounging on a couch or going to bed instead of doing housework, cooking, studying, or anything active. Clearly this is just cultural and that is my association with slippers. But my point is that it is cultural. As i said before, if you are used to a shoe off house I can understand that you would find shoes in the house a bit disgusting. And if you are used to wearing shoes then, like me, you find it odd and and undignified to not be wearing shoes. So, I think the op should understand why her parents might find her request a bit much.

I don't think peole would think that, tortoise - I wouldn't (I might get in trouble for this, but that sounds like quite an english way of looking at it). People might because it is a bit unusual but I can't imagine anyone getting annoyed.

And I answered the door in my bare feet-guess that makes me a "double slut"

Although I do know some hippy types who like to wander around barefoot.

What I've noticed in Oz is that all children take their shoes off at the door. No adult has, nor would I ask them.
On the other hand, when viewing houses for let or sale, it's expected you'll pad around in stockinged feet.

In the UK, no-one I knew ever asked adults to remove their shoes. I've never asked why, but if I think about it, it just seems so bloody rude.

Guess so .

But it´s her parents.

Blimey-if you can´t ask your parents to take shoes off without them going huffy then that´s really sad imo.

I have never seen a child take off their shoes at the door and the only times I have ever had to take off shoes when viewing a house is when the house was owned by Asians and there was a sign asking viewers to take off shoes.

It is rude because it is undignifed (which I have decided is the best word for the situation.)

Exactly - surely one should respect one's parents prejudices a bit more than others.

side issue - but I was look around someones house (to buy) the other day - and the house owner was in and said 'shoes off please' as I walked through the door...

Being 6 months pregnant and wearing boots - I thought FFS what a massive pain... (also - maybe because when I was growing up we didn't take shoes off in house, so i find it wierd - it immediately put my back up.) So I struggled to get them off - eventually succeeding (thinking - is not even as if they have a cream carpet ) and started to be shown around the house - then realised I couldn't look in the garden cos I had no shoes on...

I really think that is taking it a step too far... don't wanna buy there poxy 'shoes off' house if i can't look at it properly...

Am off to release children's feet into the bath.

That sounds stupid iggypiggy. Casual visitors , tradesmen etc don't get asked to remove their shoes (despite builders etc having filthy clumpy boots, I'm usually so delighted to have one I'd strew the floor with roses if asked.
I'd have pointed out the stupidity of their shoes off policy under those circumstances.

2rebecca I think I am conditioned to obey orders cos I just did it, slightly grumpily tho!

Workmen here bring overshoes with them.

I have 7 adult children and 13 grandchildren. As soon as they get in the door I holler 'Shoes!' and it applies to all of them.

I haven't read all of the pages - my eyes glassed over at about page 3....

...but MN never fails to amaze me, so many different opinions on what is rude & unacceptable... things that you wouldn't even consider.... I have never even thought that someone might think it presumptious or just downright revolting that I remove my outdoor shoes to enter their house...

I try to do whatever the home owners do, so if they have shoes on I'll leave mine on (so long as they are clean), if they are barefooted/stocking feet I'd take mine off too, if they have small crawling babies I always take them off - however, if your floors look dirtier than my shoes - I'll keep them on

i dont have the no shoes rules in my house as i dont want people to get their feet dirty however ,with out fail i always ,always take mine off going into someone elses .As for your parents ,i shall buy you some of those nice blue shoe covers you get in the swimming baths and you can give them to your parents to wear when they come round

I would never ask anyone to take their shoes off entering my house because i expect they have been dragged up enough to do so without asking

actually ignore the last comment , ive found a hidden bottle of baileys and know not what i say

Lots of women really enjoy buying shoes-there doesn't seem a lot of point if everyone wants them to take them off! If I go to someone's house for dinner I choose shoes to go with my outfit and don't wish to spend the evening barefoot-especially if the shoes have hardly touched a pavement. If I had dropped in after a country walk-of course I would take them off.

The problem is that the type of shoes shoe loving women like are the type most likely to mark a wooden floor, as they usually like foot crippling high heels.

They certainly aren't the sort of shoe you would want to walk far in so they seem a bit pointless if you can't wear them indoors!

I can see that you would have to take sharp heels off but I don't wear high heels.

The whole point of wooden floors is that you don't have to worry about them. Unlike carpets where a certain amount of preciousness is expected.

Madness to prefer your floors to your parents though ...