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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be depressed that people need to be told/taught to read to their children

120 replies

clemette · 31/03/2010 19:37

DS had his two year development check today and was delighted to get his bookstart pack. It is brilliant and I applaud the charity, but I did find the glossy booklet that came with it very depressing. Surely everyone knows that you should read to your children??

OP posts:

GrimmaTheNome · 31/03/2010 19:40

sadly, not every parent was themselves read to as a child so how would they know?

JaneS · 31/03/2010 19:42

YABU. I would struggle to read to my child and I need all the reminders I can get.

skihorse · 31/03/2010 19:44

YANBU. I can't believe that people could even begin to imagine this lies outside their parental responsibilities.

Firawla · 31/03/2010 19:44

well some people don't, so the packs are a good thing although the leaflets may be patronising to the people who already read but at least we still get some free books out of it. apparently a lot of people found the info useful? i see your point its sad in a way if people have to be told, but then if they are told and they start to do it then that's great, and those children wont need to be told the same when they have kids if the parents do really start reading with them a lot? it must be people who's parents haven't read to them as a child who wouldn't think of doing it, cos if they had it would come naturally.
there is a lot more to be depressed about in life than this, especially as this issue has people working on it to help like giving the packs out, libraries going into surestart encouraging people to sign up their children etc.. so yabu a little bit

mesobitchy · 31/03/2010 19:46

DD had a friend round the other evening, I was reading DS a story before he went to bed, and friend said " Why are you doing that?! " In a voice you might use to ask why someone might be putting Pot Noodle in their ear or something.

So YANBU to be saddened by it, but they ANBU to print it!

StuffedFullOfNothing · 31/03/2010 19:50

Good Good, LOADS of parents don't read to their kids. Loads of kids grow up in a house with no books at all.

Bookstart is a fantastic initiative.

TheCrackFox · 31/03/2010 19:51

It is sad but hopefully attitudes can be changed.

When DS1 started nursery I was shocked that all the children in the class were given a toothbrush and toothpaste with a leaflet telling parents where to buy said items in the future.

DorotheaPlenticlew · 31/03/2010 19:58

Surely everyone knows that not everyone knows to read to their kids?

Some people weren't fortunate enough to be read to as kids themselves, or to ever actually learn that reading is pleasurable or important at all; so yes they do need support understanding the importance of it, and you are being a bit ivory-tower not to recognize that reality.

Having said that, I agree it's a real shame.

Original poster

clemette · 31/03/2010 19:58

I realise it is a really good thing that bookstart exists and that it might help some parents, it just bothers me that it must be the majority who don't otherwise the 20 page glossy booklet (which includes tips on how to incorporate counting into daily life for example) would not be necessary.
Perhaps I am just being naive. I just thought that most people knew it is important even if, for various reasons, some parents can't.
It made me wonder how many parents don't see reading to their child as being of any value.

OP posts:

southeastastra · 31/03/2010 20:00

i can't remember my mum ever reading to me! think she was too busy as there were lots of us! still got into reading myself, i would find something more worthy to get depressed about if i were you

Original poster

clemette · 31/03/2010 20:01

And my mum used to burn my books to stop me reading, so I didn't inherit my idea of it being important from home!

OP posts:

Bonsoir · 31/03/2010 20:02

Some of the parenting practices I read about on MN are so very much more awful than parents not reading to children...

Original poster

clemette · 31/03/2010 20:02

southeastastra, it must be the teacher in me! The parents will happily blame us if their children can't read...

OP posts:

SuziKettles · 31/03/2010 20:04

I once went into a primary school to talk about how books are made as part of their book week. The teacher told me that virtually none of the children would have any books at all at home.

This was about 10 years ago in a deprived part of Glasgow. Bookstart will have been a good thing for those families.

southeastastra · 31/03/2010 20:04

oh i didn't realise you were a teacher

strandedatsea · 31/03/2010 20:07

I think it is things like this that are a really good reality check for people like us (because I too was/am shocked at how few people read to their children). Sometimes we live in a little bubble, surrounding ourselves with people just like us, and have no idea how other children are being brought up.

What I think is a shame is that Bookstart resources are being used on people who really don't need them. If they could find better ways to means test they could really concentrate on those families who can't afford to buy books for themselves.

MitchyInge · 31/03/2010 20:07

some households and families more literary than others? no way!

usualsuspect · 31/03/2010 20:09

My mum never read to me either..but I've always read loads...I read to my ds every night and he was always a good reader, but he never reads books..

strandedatsea · 31/03/2010 20:13

mitchy - for me it's not "more literary than others" as this would indicate that some read Jane Austen but others stick with Dan Brown.

No, it's shock that some homes have no books at all. And some people don't read. At all. Not even newspapers.

Original poster

clemette · 31/03/2010 20:14

MitchyInge, I don't think it is about being "literary". I'm not shocked that some people don't have the means/ability/resources, I suppose I am shocked that many of those that DO still don't bother!

OP posts:

MitchyInge · 31/03/2010 20:15

no but think that is the general term for distinguishing people who read from people who don't?

well some people probably just not wired to enjoy reading, they might prefer spreadsheets

Dominique07 · 31/03/2010 20:17

And some people don't see why they should educate their children. (Especially those who were not given a decent education themselves for whatever reason.) They just think, they will learn all they need at school!

Original poster

clemette · 31/03/2010 20:18

MitchyInge, perhaps you mean literate...?

I have never met a child that doesn't enjoy being read to.

OP posts:

Pozzled · 31/03/2010 20:18

YANBU to be depressed by it. I too think it's incredibly sad that people need to be told. But at least Bookstart are doing something about it.

I don't think means testing is a good idea for Bookstart, higher income does not always mean parents will read to children.

ScreaminEagle · 31/03/2010 20:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

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