to not want DP to go in a lapdancing club on his mates stag do?

[mummee09v]

my dp is off on a stag night in a couple of months. its just a load of mates going out in town but there has been talk about them going in lapdancing bars.

i have laughed it off to my dp and tried to be the cool girlfriend about it and made out i couldnt care less as i dont want to seem controlling or jealous. i have even said i dont care if he has a private dance! because i want to come across as cool, as i know his ex used to stop him doing things and i dont want to be like that as he really resented her for it.

but i HATE the idea of it and know i will be furious if he does end up in one. the thought of him ogling some naked girl/s who will probably be a)younger then me b)prettier than me and c)have a better body than me (i have had 2 kids, say no more) kills me....i know that it would only be a laugh for them and nothing would happen other than them looking at the girls but i would be so jealous, coz how could he not compare their young fit bodies to my 30 year old, had-2-kids body?

so i am kind of testing him in a way by saying i dont care, and "allowing" him to go in one, but surely if he loved and fancied me as much as he says he does he wouldnt need to go look at sexy young girls?

also the stag's bride is my best friend (in fact i will be on her hen do the same night) and i know for a fact she would go nuts if she found out her husband to be had been in one as we have already spoken about it and she has the same insecurities as me.

"I thought a difference of opinion on threads was a given. I don't want to PLAY anything. I just have my own opinion with no interest in currying favour/running with the majority/being a sheep."

Ahhhhh..I get it now. Gay40 is trying to be different and controversial...

It's a pity then, that she just comes across as a bit of an idiot instead.

But with my own opinion.

And while you are slagging me off, you are leaving someone else alone lol

(IE someone who cares)

Gay40 - Would you like to respond to my points?

Your oh-so-serious justification did make me smile

(Am I banned yet?)

I am really glad that I have been walking around a strange city lost in the pouring rain; as a consequence I have missed the opportunity to reinvolve myself with the horror of this thread.

Not banned, just a stupid cow.

Most SAHMs are either fortunate enough to have a higher earning husband whose income enables them to stay at home or they forego some of life's luxuries to give their children the very best care.

Calling them prostitutes is unforgiveable - but you know that already.

Why, in your warped opinion, do women simply "give" sex as part of a domestic bargain? Most women get as much from sex as their husbands do, it's not a one-sided "transaction" by any means.

perhaps because gay40 doesn't do cock she thinks those of us that do do cock have shit sex lives and only shag our husbands so they will put food on our tables

shockingly heterophobic attitude, innit

For someone who 'likes women', she sure hates women

oh puh-leeeeaze

Gay40 your attitude to partnerships is revolting.

Gay40 if you think SAHM's are basically prostitutes then presumably you think the same thing of women who are in lesbian relationships who choose to stay at home with the children while their partner earns the cash, by your reckoning they are prostitutes too then.

Well I don't mind them staying at home as long as they clean the house, get tea on the table and prance around in lacey underwear once they've put the kids to bed

Hmmm. For a woman who loves women, you sound strangely more like a bloke who hates them.

No, I love them. Honest. Especially the opinionated ones.

As a SAHM who put down the rather fucking huge deposit on our family home, it looks like my rent boy husband is gonna have to massively up the amount of cock I'm getting if he's ever going to earn his keep.

Haven't read all of this thread and don't know if the OP has left it but wanted to say mummee09v - setting yourself up to be the "cool" partner is often a road to unhappiness as it soon leads to your needs and wants being sidelined. Are you sure your DP, as a younger man, wasn't off out many weekends and evenings in his band/watching footie/drinking with mates? Treating his wife, as SGB would say as "a domestic appliance". Did he want to act single in a married relationship and hence paint her as controlling? You say that ex was controlling, are you sure you haven't got yourself in with another controlling bloke who happens to be a bit subtler about the way that he does it?

I hope you can grow confidence in yourself, from loving your own body to being able to say what you need.

This thread has become some kind of Pinteresque hell for me.

Mailficence- do you realize that your level of inappropriate over-sharing has reached the point where you look like you have some kind of social skills disorder? I am staggered, truly.

Gay40- you appear to be a rather unpleasant attention-seeker, and I can only assume you are some sort of internet troll in the traditional sense of the word. I don't want to engage with you, and for the first time since I've been here, I wish that HQ had an option to hide certain people's posts.

The descent of this whole thread makes me want to bloody weep.

Alas, freedom of speech does rule (mostly).
BoF....admit it. You can't resist engaging, whether it amuses or enrages you

Don't let it worry you bitoffun...I'm liking her really...proves there's all sorts even in the Gay community....(although I doubt she'd be able to get a mermaid wet in a swimming pool)

Tell him. But like Topantail, I am saddened to read about your insecurities. I wouldn't care if dh went. I am comfortable with myself and know he loves me.
why are you so insecure ?