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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to want DS's nursery to not use words like "ta" and "doggie"?

281 replies

Naetha · 08/03/2010 14:57

I understand the benefit of getting babies/young toddlers into the habit of saying "ta" instead of thankyou as it's easier to say, but when they're 2+ and saying thankyou perfectly well, isn't this a bit infantile?

And why doggie?? Surely dog is easier and straight to the point.

Am I just a snob?

OP posts:
porcamiseria · 08/03/2010 17:25

My DC also says ta, hey ho......and I was a teeensy bit mortified but got over it

thecloudhopper · 08/03/2010 17:33

I have for the 1st time in carear used the word ta with a child who has Downs as he has just mastered how to say ta so am using it, eventually we will move onto thank you but ATM ta will do.

Also hate doggie and horsie and I speak to all the children I work with usng the correct language.

PS sorry about spellings am a bit dyslexic today.
pps am realy dyslexic so am not making a joke.

Blondeshavemorefun · 08/03/2010 17:46

thicko working in childcare

cant STAND ta but dont mind doggie/horsey etc

saying that by the time they get to 2+ you would think nursery would be teaching dog/horse etc

thecloudhopper · 08/03/2010 17:47

PSCMUM I have to disagree with you in my profesional opinion I think that you have a nack with children or you do not regardless of how well educated you are. Yes basic maths, language and knowladge is needed but if you care, have good people skills, common sence and the patents of a saint then you will make it in early years.
I have seen many trainee teachers in my time who have the degree in marine biology or whatever but have no idea inside a classroom. They may be well educated but this does not help them with the nitty gritty of classroom life.

Bonsoir · 08/03/2010 17:47

Pixie - it says that Mummy was there all the time and didn't need to be called . And that I said "thank you" to DD a lot - in fact, every time she handed me something!

thecloudhopper · 08/03/2010 17:49

I think I hate doggie and horsie becouse my mum does and that has sort of rubbed off on me.

Morloth · 08/03/2010 17:52

I got me a lot of the book learnin's and don't see the problem with "ta", this is another one of those class things I don't get isn't it?

ImSoNotTelling · 08/03/2010 17:55

I don't understand this lower socio economic ta thing at all. it's regional I'm sure.

double

PixieOnaLeaf · 08/03/2010 18:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

PintandChips · 08/03/2010 18:19

Sorry OP but you would think you had FAILED your children if they felt that they wanted to take a career looking after children? Are you mental?

I know you keep trying to make out that you are NOT being really snobby, but i have just read this whole thread and it's made me feel really angry! How dare you look down your nose at people like that!

Maybe you should look after your own children if you're so bothered about it?

My sister looks after old people and prior to that looked after children for years - both jobs for the badly educated, 'stupid' people, and do you know why she does it? Because she really really enjoys looking after people, she gets real satisfaction from it, because it's WHAT SHE WANTED TO DO.

All the girls at the nursery my son is at are qualified, his key worker at his last nursery had a degree in child psychology and spoke two languages fluently. She was vastly more educated than me.

Perhaps you chose a shit nursery.

You really are not coming across well at all. You sound like a right fucking snob.

I know my tone is aggressive, but wow, you are a bit shocking.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 08/03/2010 18:24

Well said Pinta

Oblomov · 08/03/2010 18:26

i hate ta. don't know why. just think its really, um, er, common. ds2's carer at nursery says it and dh hates it too, but we were not sure whether to say anything to her, incase we too sounded snobby.
he is 1.4, and compared to all the others on my MN pn thread, he says very few words - only dada,mama, and yesterday 'dank oohh'.
so maybe i will just let it go.

VinegarTits · 08/03/2010 18:27

In answer to your last post to me (a while back now, its a long commute home from my office)

'really vingertits, so a childminder is just as socially respected as a doctor or lawyer are they?'

Nope i didnt say that dear, i said, imo, childcare is a respected profession

Frankly, i would rather be a 'dim girl' who says 'ta' than an out and out ignorant, nasty snob

Be interested to know what your profession is though?

Janos · 08/03/2010 18:38

PCSMum..it's there in black and white.

You've called childcare professionals (because that's what they are)'badly educated', 'thickos' and 'dim'.

I think that is a horrible attitude.

Rockbird · 08/03/2010 18:40

I give up, it's time for a MN break I think. The fuckwittery and snottiness on here at the moment is just too much. I've been in childcare. I have a degree. So have several other posters on this thread. But no, people working in childcare are still the lowest common denominator. My cousin has been in childcare all her working life. she has qualifications coming out of her ears. It's still crap pay but she loves the job, is fantastic with the children and the parents think the world of her. But I'll pass on that she's a failure, thanks for letting me know . Jeez...

VinegarTits · 08/03/2010 18:41

That was to PSCMUM btw

I never mentioned doctors or lawyers, are you saying the only respected professions are high calibre ones like those?

Cos i'm pretty sure any 'profession' is respectable unless it involves something illegal of course

Now i am not saying a Nursery Nurse is on par with a Brain Surgeon, but they dont deserve the slating you have given them on here, for someone who claims to be intelligent, you have showed the complete opposite on this thread

Clayhead · 08/03/2010 18:44

I am a childcare professional.

I also say 'Ta' all the time, when talking to adults or children.

In fact, I usually say, 'Ta, duck'. Horror of horrors.

[waves MSc at anyone who is interested ]

expatinscotland · 08/03/2010 18:45

It's been ages since we had the ol' 'ta' thread.

What about a regional accent one? C'mon, it's been a whole month since we've had one of those.

expatinscotland · 08/03/2010 18:48

'this is another on'e of those class things I don't get isn't it?

Yes, it is, Morloth.

And if only they could see how ridiculous it all looks to the rest of the world .

Morloth · 08/03/2010 18:52

It is just confusing expat. I can't figure it out.

shatteredmumsrus · 08/03/2010 19:03

dont see the problem with either word myself....

squilly · 08/03/2010 19:12

I just went with what was natural when teaching my dd how to speak and that included using 'baby-speak' and words like 'ta' and 'doggie'.

DD is now 9 and can figure out the right words to use in a wide range of situations. The words 'ta' and 'doggie' no longer feature in her everyday speech, so I figure it did her no damage.

I have to say I was also just grateful that my dd's nursery looked after her emotional and early educational needs when I working and she was in their care. They may not have been graduates or intellectuals, some people would call them 'thickos' no doubt. That would be their loss imo. They have a lot to offer, just not academic smartness...which isn't always what it's cracked up to be anyway!

whizzmum · 08/03/2010 19:16

PSCMUM - I think you have been incredibly rude on this thread...condascending..judgemental....narrow-minded, etc...... By the way, well said PintandChips! In my opinion, childcare workers are, in the main, caring, dedicated, kind and polite. Quite frankly, if one of my children chose it as an option, I'd be very proud of them. I think there are far more important things in life - like being KIND, POLITE AND CARING! I think people that do jobs like nursing, TAs, childcare professionals, etc do a wonderful job and I take my hat off to anyone working with the elderly, because much as I love old people, I know that I couldn;t do that job, - just as well there are people out there who can! Let's see how you view them when you are sat there in the nursing home in years' time....

Rockbird · 08/03/2010 19:17

Precisely squilly. How many 9 year olds say ta and doggie just because they were taught that as babies? No one at work says doggie, although at least some of them must have used it as children. But then none of them drink out of bottles (except beer), use dummies or sleep in cots, or any one of the other things they did as children.

Mrsdoasyouwouldbedoneby · 08/03/2010 19:24

PSCMUM
i'd like to see people who had studied and have in depth knowlegde of child development, psychology, structured play etc

Erm... I am beside myself with the irony (in terms of my current situation), of this one...

If you KNEW about the standards many boroughs set you would KNOW that this sort of thing is, indeed, necessary!!

I have a degree, some qualifications in Care (sen), but they DO NOT qualify me adequately to work in child care. Instead I have to self fund my course (level 4... involves LOTS about all the things you think are important... actually certain courses on the lower levels do to, but that is beside the point), to do a job that pays min wage. I can't afford it. Not at this present moment anyway. Both of my other colleagues are going to start doing foundation degrees because they ARE trying to raise standards. They wanted me to qualify as an Early Years Professional (THIS would be funded)... so that is POST_GRAD.... and it would pay better too... if any setting could afford it...
We have to keep detailed files, plan for progress, chart that progress and assess the needs of the children, far beyond please and thank you (which we use, not ta). We work with a detailed framework that ends in Reception. You can't be stupid to do that. In fact... the girls who thought it would be an easy ride took one look and erm, ran...
I suspect the workers in your Nursery SOUND thick, but they probably aren't... not if they have to do half the things they are supposed to do (and the training in play/sen,social communication etc that they probably receive). They might not have DEGREES (whole lot of use that did me), but they can be eminently qualified to do their job (one YOU would be unlikely to qualify for)!!