I lOVE my mother in law

[duchesse]

My mother in law is fab. She's not easy to live with (I know that because we lived with her for 10 years) but she is just lovely and here's why:

1. She adores the children and has a lovely relationship with them
2. She has her own very active life but never fails to fit us in somewhere
3. She is a fount of common sense and wisdom on many topics and is extremely competent in many many areas
4. She interferes just the right amount now that we are no longer living together

Yes, she is not easy to live with (she specialised in mixed messages and undermining us subtly as parents when we were living together, and I would cheerfully have throttled her at times). Yes, she finds it difficult to see anyone doing anything without wanting to join in/ take over (traits I now see appearing in my 14 yo, so not so much MIL traits as competent woman traits). Yes, she is ruthlessly efficient to the point of neglecting detail at times.

But, see points 1-4 above. They outweigh anything else. She has lived through the death of a 21 yo son and her husband. My husband is her only child, our 4 children her only grandchildren. She feels blessed to have them, and we feel enriched by her presence in our lives.

I love mine ...and I just wish I had the time to be a more involved DIL.

Still love my ex mil too...

Mines great too. SHe gets on my nerves sometimes. Then my best friend is great and she gets on my nerves sometimes too. I am sure I get on both of their nerves plenty of times too. That's the richness of life.

Truly don't understand why some DIL are hell bent on resenting their MIL and don't give them the latitude other people are given. Life is toooooooooo short.

Mine is not stricrly a MiL as we are not married but I still wanted to post and say how lovely she is. he is kindness and gentleness personified. She loves my DS to bits, gave up 2 days a week of her job so she could look after him for free and insists that it is a pleasure to do it.

She is so lovely to DS and he loves his grandparents so lunch. It's lovely to see.

I was speaking to my own mother on the phone at the weekend and she was telling me how she was telling off her friend for babysitting her grandkids. She told me that she had boasted to said friend about how we (me and my siblings) would never ask her to do anything for us. She thinks this is a good thing! It is all in such stark contrast to DP's mum.

so much, not so lunch

I love my MIL as well, she's a rock, and never ever criticises, even when DCs are being little sods and the house is a complete tip.

But FIL recently topped that by saying the nicest thing ever - he was reporting a conversation

"...and I said to him 'my daughter asked..' - Oh, you don't mind that I called you my daughter do you? because that's how I think of you."

Bless! I'm welling up just typing it. Obv I made it clear to him how flattered I was, and how lucky I am.

I love my MIL. I feel really, really lucky to have such a lovely woman in my life who has taken me on as if I was her own daughter. She's been more a mum to me in the last 7 years then my own mother ever has, I even semi-moved in with her when DH had to go away on training as I'd injured my back & could barely walk.

She adores the DC, offers to babysit as much as she can, encourages me & DH to have some time to ourselves, is a wonderful person to be around, great to talk to & just one of the nicest people I have ever known. I know that I can phone her about anything, even to moan about DH & she'll always listen. I often go over to visit for the day & we even went to see a London show together the other week, we had a really lovely time.

I've always said to DH if we split I get his mum in the divorce

Awwww Dilys that's lovely, gave me goosebumps

My MIL is one of those sweet old ladies with long white hair in a bun who is always baking bread and cakes!
She's raised seven children including my husband and never criticises or complains about anything. She's always counting her blessings (and her many grandchildren!).

My IL's were very strange to me at first, being as I am from a family where people argue, criticise, shout etc., they never fall out, no-one ever shouts, and unlike my family no-one seems top expect anything from each other whereas my mum always orders everyone about and pokes her nose in!! At first I had to pretend I was interested in talking about cakes or birds for hours on end, whilst sneaking off for a ciggie when I used to smoked, and a good swear! Now I love listening to her witter on about whatever she likes, it's very comforting.

Unlike my mum she'd never make a fuss about a forgotten birthday card (there's so many of them it's par for the course), or demand a visit, or make any other odd demands I hear so much about on here and from my friend's MIL's so I do feel very lucky.

Just wish she didn't live four hours away so I could get some babysitting from her! She doesn't really like to come to scary old London either, bless her.

Ooh, how exciting, my thread is on discussions of the day. First time.

My MIL is pretty much perfect. As well as being completely non-judgy and relaxing to be around, she has also been a Brownie leader for umpteen years and is therefore a genius at thinking of fun ways to entertain my dd and ds. At 60 she has more energy than I do!

Mine is no trouble at all..........wish my DH could say the same about his.........

What a lovely thread-it restores my faith in human nature! It has even got to 88 messages!
Mine took a while to get to know, but well worth the effort. She is a friend, always helpful and doesn't interfere.
Unfortunately both my ILs now have poor health, but when the DCs were small they could come and stay in our house and look after them for a night or they 'house sat' while we were all on holiday and we came back to meal and a trim, tidy garden. This is especially good because their own son died and they do this for DH2 and are grandparents to our DC's too. Sadly I didn't have a MIL with second marriage as she died before I met DH.

My MIL is great. Brought her DS up to be an excellent, independent and considerate man. She is amazing with DS and DD.
She comes round once or twice a week in the week and we go over to hers on a Sunday, sometimes she'll have DS for a few hours on a Sunday depending if we go out or not!
She gives good advice when asked for it and is generally a very sensible reliable woman.

A good friend of mines mum is friends with MIL (still with me here..? ) and just this weekend she told me that apparantly my MIL thinks the world of me, it made me feel all warm and fuzzy that she thinks so highly of me!!

Cannot abide my mil but if you have a great relationship with yours that GREAT.

YANBU

I don't have a mother in law but reading this, I wish I did. And if I could magic the perfect mother in law, I'd clone my mum and make her it.

Lovely to hear these nice things about lovely MILs

My MIL is fab and I like her more than my Mum (I love my Mum, but she is hard work).

MIL will always take the DCs when she can, she plays with them, indulges them horribly, but obviously adores them and they adore her back.

She has her moments when she does things that are a little making but so does her son (and I have to live with him!).

I havent known mine long enough to love her but she is lovely. I think as I was the new model and younger one at that after such a long time. I think she found the change hard going. Now things are settled and Im about to make her a grandma and she is bending over backwards to strengthen our bond. Im sorry some obv. dont have a good relationship but its nice we have a nice mil thread

Mine is great too. Has been absolutely fantastic since DS was born. Her worst trait is that she wont let him try to crawl for toys; she passes them too easily.

Lovely thread

Mine can of course drive me nuts but then so can DH! She is unfailingly kind, never loses her temper, dotes on dd and is my "second Mum".

Three cheers for great MILs!

My MIL is fab too. We go and stay with her a few times a year and basically we put our feet up and she feeds us, does childcare, and lets us have time together. She adores DS and has more tact and diplomacy than I can begin to grasp (not my strong point, and sadly I suspect she's been at the receiving end of my tactlessness more than once).

I did struggle with the non-optional moving in with us for a week when DS was born, but looking back without the fug of stress, exhaustion and hormones I can see she was a huge help washing, cooking and cleaning.

She's lost a husband and had to face cancer twice and she's one of the strongest, bravest ladies you could meet. I'm very lucky

I love my MIL - she drives me mad at times (her specialty is the dramatic arts and telling me what to do) but she has taken to me and DS, she makes me laugh, is good conversation and is always there when I need an extra shoulder to cry on. She was also an amazing support when I started BF'ing.

I adore mine too.

My 3 DCs are not my DH's but she still loves them. In fact she does more for them despite living 150 miles away than their biological grandparents do and they live 10 miles away.

She has never had a cross word for anybody and offers to help out during the holidays, yet somehow manages to not appear "interfering".

She lost her eldest son last year and yet still managed to worry about my DCs and how they were feeling rather than herself.

I love her to bits and will be sending something suitably floral and over the top for mother's day.

Blessed with both my MIL and FIL..truly! Love them deeply and love what they have to give to all their GC, not just my two. Superb role models both. And irreplaceable