Is my dh being unreasonable to not one to serve a b/feeding mother at the counter???

[twotimes]

Twas talking to the dh this morning when he brought up an incident that happened in work the other day. He was working in a a well known mobile phone shop behind the counter when a woman came in with her daughter and her three kids. Both the women were at the counter discussing mobile options with dh whilst two of the children were running around the shop. All of a sudden mid conversation dh turned to get a phone and when he had turned back the daughter had whopped them out and started b/feeding. And he hasten's to add - with absolutely no modesty, just in her full glory. I should note, the baby was *not8 crying or making a sound before hand. Was he being unreasonable to be mortified??????

Now this isn't completely serious, he wasn't rude, he just carried on serving but felt the need to tell me about it later. He isn't a prude, I b/fed both dc's and all his family b/feed that isn't the issue. What he keeps going on about, is that "she didn't even cover".

At first I just pissed my self laughing (I could literally imagine his face) but then I thought seriously, people should be able to b/feed but at a counter in a shop, with no discretion?

My DS is exactly the same. No sleep very grumpy. I wish getting my saggy boobs out would still entertain him!!

Lol, maybe she found it hard to feed discreetly. I have 2dcs and never mastered it. I have to get my boob out, or my dc end up sucking my top, milk running down my belly, clothes soaked. I tried covering with a cloth, but it was a fumble and my dd freaks out. I fed my ds in the car before i went into Slimming world. I had a sheer top on over a feeding top, which i had just uncliped. I forgot to put my clip back in and went into the class like that, got weighed, done the talk, and no one told me!! Imagine how mortified they were..
I don't think you are bu though, your dp carried on serving and didn't say anything so you can't really ask for more than that. Honestly, if someone had their boob out at my till, i would probably look too.

yes, i would definitely notice if someone got hers out, but he was bu to not want to serve her

There's another way to look at it.
If you were a first time mum and were anxious about BFing when you were out and about with your baby because you felt self conscious, what would make you feel less worried about trying it:

seeing a woman with her whole breast exposed feeding her child in public
or
seeing a woman BFing her baby discreetly in a manner that means she doesn't attract more attention to herself than she would like and seeing that it's possible to BF your baby without feeling anxious about exposing yourself more than you'd like?

I think I am lucky in having small breasts as it is easier to feed discreetly when your breasts aren't huge.

Am trying to remember if I ever fed DS or DD while standing up in public. Quite possibly with DD who as Neglected Second Child had to fit in more

I did go for the entry from underneath method which is less exposing but that was my choice. I'd say Mr twofalls looked at the "wrong" second and was surprised. If I was serving someone and looked up and saw their breast I would be surprised. I eouldn't get turned on by the breast but I would be suprised for a few seconds at any rate.

SPB, he didn't not want to serve her I don't think. He was just a bit flustered that he caught the sight of a nipple - a whole nipple!

ok but if you're readoing a thread what's going to make you more confident:

"try to be discreet but if you flash it's not the end of the world"

OR

"you are allowed to bfip as long as:

-you are discrete
-you cover up with a muslin
-you are considerate of those round you
-you sit in a chair ion an appropriate spot
-your baby is crying first
to
-try not to - time your goings out carefully
-express and take a bottle
-give some formula when out
i would be

nb baby will not sleep, feed or play!!

sorry for 'discrete' i do know!!

Can you ask dh how he feels if he is serving a customer and they take a call in the middle of the conversation? I hate that...

rhubarb, i think the 'one' in the title means 'want', and that ios what it says

PLEASE tell me AbetaDad is joking?

Are you serious? She should have asked you if you minded her feeding in her own fucking house?
Impolite?

I am too angry to type. I think "take your stiff upper english polite lip and shove it up your arse" may suffice.

runny - take a chill pill.

Perhaps I wouldn't be so angry if I hadn't recently been berated, jeered at and asked to leave a supermarket for feeding fucking discreetly in the beer aisle.
Can make one a little more militant.

have you rb? where was that?

NI, Stealth, sodding sainsburys.

complain!

Runnybottom - what do you expect if you do it in the beer aisle? Next time go somewhere more female-friendly, like Home Baking

runnybottom - that's rather rude.
Not everyone feels comfortable seeing more of someone than they're used to. It doesn't make someone wrong just because they're not used to seeing your breasts and they see them during BFing.

or the toilet paper aisle out of consideration for all those people who think bf is like going to the toilet

I was referring to the attack on ABetaDad, not the supermarket.

Did you also have a pair of jim jams on whilst feeding in the lager section and did you have a fag hanging out of one corner of your mouth? No? Sorry, just had to ask!

ABD probably wasn't joking and I can see where he is coming from.

Whilst you should be able to do what you like in your own home, when you have invited guests you do tend to tone down certain aspects of your behaviour. For instance I tend to refrain from farting loudly and giving myself marks out of ten.

If the lady in question had merely said "excuse me a minute", unclipped on dungaree strap and fed, I'm sure ABD would not have batted an eyelid. However " she just dropped the front of her dungarees in mid sentence to fully expose both breasts"

Now for a man to be on a playdate with a woman (not them playing obv, having a playdate without children would probably mean something entirely different) would be uncomfortable for the man in the first place. For her to then expose both breasts before picking up her child to feed is guaranteed to make the man feel even more uncomfortable.

It's all a question of decorum whilst you have guests. You would not do anything to make your guests feel uncomfortable and I'm sure she could have made that situation a lot better for her male guest.

It wasn't an attack, it was a reaction. I think the idea that a woman should ask a visitor in her home for permission to feed her baby abhorrent, especially from someone who expects women to hide in corners covered in shawls if they dare to venture outside.
Its about control and the idea that your comfort is more important than my right to feed. It isn't and it never will be, especially in my own home.

If a baby needs a feed, feed it, wherever, whenever. And if someone gets offended by a split second flash of nipple or the top of a breast then thats their problem.

And quite frankly you'd have to be staring pretty intently to get a nipple flash.

Meant to add that I'm not disagreeing that she shouldn't have made her guest uncomfortable, but am I the only one who read the rest of his post. It wasn't merely her flashing him, it was feeding at all she should have asked him if he minded.