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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think "My child won't speak" is a load of tosh

162 replies

bruceb · 02/02/2010 22:56

My DW is sitting next to me on the settee and she was dictating her version, which included the words "fucking".

Parents pandering to unreasonable behaviour.

Discuss

OP posts:
overmydeadbody · 02/02/2010 23:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

TheCrackFox · 02/02/2010 23:23

"Why have the parents permitted it to last for years?"

Do you have any idea, at all, how hard it can be to get the correct help for a child with special needs?

Your arrogance is astounding.

RedbinDippers · 02/02/2010 23:23

As I say, I am clearly an uneducated arsehole who knows fuck all so I will go back to painting my nails.

What colour?

SuperBunny · 02/02/2010 23:23

The parents haven't permitted it. Parents don't permit their children to have any sort of special needs. They just deal with it as best they can. These parents have the support of the schools and speech therapists and presumably other people have been involved.

I'm cross now.

Original poster
bruceb · 02/02/2010 23:24

I do love it when people put words in your mouth....

"Next you'll be saying xxx or yyy".

"your smug wife"

OP posts:
MollieO · 02/02/2010 23:24

Superbunny - j.o.k.e. hence the .

I didn't speak at school for the first term. I didn't like the teacher so I can understand the issue. I didn't speak until the second term when we had a relief teacher. They then discovered that at 5 I had reading age of 9 and was the brightest in the class (I had ben completely ignored by the other teacher). In my day not talking meant deprivation of any treats, playtime etc etc. No therapy or 'treatment'.

GetOrfMoiLand · 02/02/2010 23:24

Yes, hearty scout like encouragement out of a phobia. Why did nobody think of this before.

For arachnophobia - chuck a spider at them, say 'it won't hurt you' laughter etc.

For agoraphobia - take them to Oxford Street on a Saturday and then fuck off out of it.

For clinically depressed people - dress up as a clown, tell a couple of knock knock jokes, cheer up it'll never happen remarks etc.

For ADHD children - smack them as they are attention seeking.

The above ideas are no more stupid than the OP.

Olifin · 02/02/2010 23:25

How cute are Red and her Grandad?

SuperBunny · 02/02/2010 23:26

Sorry Mollie! Am obv a bit sensitive about this issue

EmilyStrange · 02/02/2010 23:26

Ah think I get it now and my original feeling of wtf you are seriously bu seems to stand.

But I also think that for many children who stand silently in the face of adult conversation, the shyness though less extreme is still touch for that child and is not the result of bad parenting or such. Shyness is crippling and if I have gone off on a wrong tangent please forgive me.

MillyR · 02/02/2010 23:26

Maybe instead of shouting at them, their parents could tell them to 'pull themselves together.' I've heard that is a recognised clinical treatment for depression. Also useful is telling people who self-harm that they should 'stop showing off.'

overmydeadbody · 02/02/2010 23:26

BigadMummy because it takes time, that's why it took so long.

You can't just shake or shout a child out of SM in a matter of days, believe me. It is not something the parents have control over, it is something the child controls.

Are you even a parent yourself? If you are you should know there are some things that you just can't force a child to do.

wastwinsetandpearls · 02/02/2010 23:27

getorf.

A student I teach with SM spoke to me, albeit very quietly and in a quite rushed manner, last year. I did not acheive that by rushing in gun ho or telling him to "just fucking speak" but by being very gentle and supportive.

Sazisi · 02/02/2010 23:27

According to my telly, it doesn't start for another 10mins

I knew a little boy years ago who stopped talking when his sister died

BitOfFun · 02/02/2010 23:27

It was very encouraging seeing them all make progress with a patient understanding approach, wasn't it?

Olifin · 02/02/2010 23:28

Ermmm, BigBadMummy, you seem to have posted under another name by mistake!

Alambil · 02/02/2010 23:28

Red and her grandad are so sweet... and isn't Megan's voice tiny! So fragile...

SM intrigues me. I'd love to learn more about it - can't see how it's put on though.

Original poster
bruceb · 02/02/2010 23:28

And I thought this was a "am I being unreasonable" thread, not an "open season for personal insults" thread.....

OP posts:
GetOrfMoiLand · 02/02/2010 23:30

Aw shuddup Bruce, don't be such a cry baby, pul yourself together etc.

overmydeadbody · 02/02/2010 23:30

Superbunny me too, I am quite cross at the ignorance of the OP and his wife

Olifin · 02/02/2010 23:31

It was great to see Megan grinning after speaking in class

Original poster
bruceb · 02/02/2010 23:31

Oh and I think Hulababy that what I offered was an opinion, not a decision.

And I am completely qualified to offer an opinion, thank you very much.

OP posts:
overmydeadbody · 02/02/2010 23:31

do you not realise your thread was a personal insult to children with SM and their parents?

TheCrackFox · 02/02/2010 23:32

We wouldn't want to be accused of pandering to you though Bruce.

MavisEnderby · 02/02/2010 23:34

are you a paediatrician/psychologist/psychiatrist then?

(nosey emoticon)