to be considering 2 days a week at nursery

[deliakate]

for DS even though I am a sahm?

I don't think there will be a place available for him until he's 12 month, and by then, I hope to be just or very nearly pregnant with no. 2, so I figure I will need the rest. Is this a bit much to ask though?

mn have sussed she is a wind up merchant

REALLY ? Bloody hell I only went to watch the end of Silent Witness !!!! What have I missed???

Not that exciting... She said she'd found that she could no longer post under her original name as there had been so many complaints, etc, she was (I assume) removed.

Now that I've got used to her and her outrageous comments I find her quite amusing but I think I've missed some of the more outrageous ones!

But she's back for more you've got to give it to her she doesn't give in easily!

WWC primer

BFing=good
Nursery=bad
ex-partners of DH who want financial support=bad
people who disagree with above=bad

I haven't read the thread yet, but there is nothing wrong with this at all. DH is a SAHD and DS goes to nursery 2 days a week and has been since he was 18 months old. From 12 months he went for one day.

It gives DH a break from DS (to do up the house), and just as importantly it gives DS a break from DH and home.

We struggle to afford it tbh, but it is the only thing that keeps DH sane as a SAHD. And if he couldn't SAH any more we'd be up the creek without a paddle as mine is the steady line of work.

WWC - Even biddulph concludes that up to 16 hours per week in a family member/childminder/small nursery type setting is fine for under 2s.

Deliakate - you could also consider childminders as many of them offer part time places. My DS started going to a childminder at 12 months. He settled really quickly and absolutely loves it. I'm working and he is there from 8:30 through to about 5pm. It is quite a long day and a 4pm pick up would probably be ideal really. Overall though I think there is a positive benefit for us both.

YANBU at all and I know many SAHMs that do this.

i don't mind WWC as it goes, she is quite funny when she's not on the wind-up.

OK, I've now read the thread and I still agree with myself.

YANBU. I think most nurseries stipulate at least 3 half day sessions in a week. I do agree that half days may be better initially. For us half days just aren't worthwhile (and aren't really possible) because we only have one car and live 15 miles from the nursery.

Oh, and for me childminders are fine if it's just childcare you really need. If you're also looking for your DS to mix with several children his own age and get a range of experiences then I would choose a good nursery hands down.

gaelicsheet that made me smile! I love the "I still agree with myself" comment.

I'm going to be using it in the next annoying meeting I'm stuck in ie "Yes, you've made a very valid point there but I still agree with myself."

gaeleic - I think with the early years foundation thingy (don't think that is the technical term btw ) they have to do more than just childcare now as they have to show that the children are involved in the same sort of activities that they would be at a nursery.

oops, gaelicsheep, sorry! Oh and I liked the bit where you still agreed with yourself too!

I think the main problem with this, if you remove posts from people from minority parenting styles, you inevitably support a majority view - which is sad.

There are very sound arguments for believing that bf-ing is important, some reasonable arguments for being concerned that nursery ain't great for babies... now all these views might not be popular ... but should they really be censored out of existence?

I love you guys too

give your chops a rest WashwithCare.political agitator you aint.for what ever reason you likey a scrap and contentious get-em-goin posts

WashwithCare/washing machine why dont you just compose a post.no hyberbole.no embellishment. just see how that goes...

anyway i bid you cheerio.sure you will change your name again anyhoo (will you retain the laundry theme?)

I did this.

I sent my youngest DS to nursery for three mornings a week when he was 20 months old,a nd I was pregnant with DC2.

I was very sick in this pregnancy and really could not cope (had good medical treatment though). But i think that even if I had not been sick I might have done it, I found being a full time SAHM so much harder work than "real" (ie office) work. Esp. as my DS1 was a reflux-cry-baby.

God, I cried and cried myself, I needed these mornings just to breathe...

Nursery is a big hassle IMVHO and poor value for money for SAHMs. Much easier, cheaper and simpler to have someone (a mother's help) come to your house to give you a hand with whatever you need (cleaning, cooking, bathing your baby, changing nappies, playing with your toddler, babysitting while you go out) on the day. And your children won't be exposed to bugs in the way they are at nursery.

scottishmummy - people in glass houses... .

Why don't you compose a post using standard grammar?

Wow! I actually agree with Bonsoir on this one (apart from mother's help being cheaper). Nursery is usually 3.5-5.5 pounds/ hr, mother's help 6-8 but they can help with bits of housework too and come to your house. I think there is a big difference between a baby of 10/ 12 months and a 2 year old attending nursery.
To find a childminder- look on council website, check with mothers locally.
To find a mother's help- advertise on gumtree.com and other local places eg boards at local primary schools, also worth contacting local colleges with childcare courses on offer as they may have students.

Fair enough, it must depend on where you live. When I looked into nursery for my DD when she was 2, it was quickly apparent that it was the same cost per hour as having someone come to the house, plus I wouldn't have the hassle of getting her to and fro (and the nursery was a zillion times less nice for her than being at home, which was the absolute dealbreaker).

I have started mine at age two for two mornings a week. I have been heavily pregnant by this time both times lol. I have to say in SOME ways I find itmore hassle than having them around the house because its an extra thing that gets added into the routine.In other ways it is great, I can take my youngest to baby groups, or just for a nice relaxed stroll around the shops (impossible with a two year old).

This time the age gap will only be 16 months at the most (my last two have been a month early so could be less) I am having the same debate in my head as you. I always thought it was best to keep them home until 2 BUT now I think that with the four of them I might just need one or two mornings a week with just the newborn.

Both of mine went to nursery 3 mornings/week from the age of 2.

I have no family close by, and I needed time to do housework/standing in queues at the PO etc. I wanted them out of the house for a while for some peace, as opposed to someone coming into my house.

Nursery isn't great for long days as the children do spend all day in 1 room, with the adults deciding what the toys of the day are.

I think 2 is fine, since most kids can talk and have a modicum of independence. younger than that, they are still very dependant on adults. Nursery rooms can be very noisy as well, and it only takes a couple of wailing toddlers to slash the staff:child ratio for the rest of the room.

Still, they are very well cared for, especially if you are blessed with cuddly staff.

My ds went 2 days a week when he was about 15 months. Dd, our second, from around 10 months.
Best money we've ever spent.
I didn't want a babysitter, or a mother's help. I thought that a few hrs away at nursery, with the noise, the laughters, the crying, different toys, different situations, different emotions coupled with spending the rest of their time with me and dh would have achieved a good balance for our dc.
And it did, because our dc were happy toddlers.