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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not let DD go to this swimming party...

124 replies

Eve4Walle · 28/01/2010 17:01

because it states on the invite that I'll have to get in the water with her?

Invite is from a very nice little boy in her class, who is having a joint pool party with another little boy in the next class.

The Mums at school are generally a nice bunch but I really can't face getting my flabby bits out in front of them and being judged, as I undoubtedly will (as will all the other Mums). DH has already said he won't take her so what am I to do?

OP posts:
bibbitybobbityhat · 28/01/2010 17:02

Yanbu. I wouldn't either.

PussinJimmyChoos · 28/01/2010 17:03

DS has just had an invite to a pool party too - neither DH or I fancy the other nursery parents seeing us in our swim gear so we will be declining

Who thinks swim parties are a good idea?!!!

ZZZenAgain · 28/01/2010 17:04

If you don't want to, don't do it. Have you had a look around for a swimsuit that might cover you up more and make you feel less uncomfortable if you think you should really go and try it? In the water anyway, you are not as visible as walking about. You could take a dressing gown or something like that to wear out of the pool.

I find it a weird invitation tbh.

TrillianAstra · 28/01/2010 17:05

Why is it a weird invitation? Most swimming pools have rules on how many adults are needed per child, so if children are under 8 then a pool party needs parents to come and supervise.

thedollshouse · 28/01/2010 17:06

There is no way I would go I would make dh go. Is it a shame for your dd to miss out though can you not persuade dh to go?

NoahAndTheWhale · 28/01/2010 17:06

I think probably all the other mums will feel similar to you.

belgo · 28/01/2010 17:07

How old are the children? Some pools have rules saying one adult per child.

I wouldn't do a swimming party until my children were at least 9 or 10 years old, and then I would limit the numbers to children I knew could swim.

YABU, I would go along,it will be fun, but only if I got some birthday cake afterwards!

RubysReturn · 28/01/2010 17:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ZZZenAgain · 28/01/2010 17:08

that's how I would do it belgo, if I ever had a pool party. I find it weird to invite so many non swimmers and then need a whole pile of parents in the pool with them. Find it weird personally as an idea but ok if other people like the sound of it, no skin off my nose

Angeliz · 28/01/2010 17:09

I wouldn't go, my children get enough parties, won't hurt to miss one.
I would NOT get into a pool with all the other Mums and Dads, i am terribly self conscious like that!

RatherBeOnThePiste · 28/01/2010 17:09

it will be all dads in the pool!

Original poster
Eve4Walle · 28/01/2010 17:09

I might have to get on with it really. But where can I get a swimsuit with the kind of corsetry you'd normally find Dita VT wearing?

OP posts:
ZZZenAgain · 28/01/2010 17:10

if it's all dads , it might be more interesting after all.

BigMomma3 · 28/01/2010 17:10

I've turned down an invite like this before so YANBU and unless the majority of other mums are YUMMIES, the poor kids probably won't get many takers!

DD had one when she was 8 and that was the right age for them to have a good splash with adults standing at the side and with armbands (if needed) without the fear of them drowning (small hotel leisure club pool). Any younger than that and I don't see the point.

Original poster
Eve4Walle · 28/01/2010 17:10

DH lost 8 stone last year so is better equipped than me, but he still has his hang-ups and refuses to take her.

OP posts:
ZZZenAgain · 28/01/2010 17:10

would feel even less tempted to run the gauntlet though

ZZZenAgain · 28/01/2010 17:11

call up and ask if they're providing water-proof caftans

Intergalactic · 28/01/2010 17:12

Figleaves have some good control ones that aren't too frumpy. It does sound like a bit of a nightmare - I would only go if I knew I wasn't likely to be the biggest one there. I am clearly a horrible person.

diddl · 28/01/2010 17:13

Would depend on how badly my daughter wanted to go tbh.

Original poster
Eve4Walle · 28/01/2010 17:14

I know I wouldn't be the biggest (I'm a size 16 but with enormous boobage). But I'm still not tempted.

OP posts:
bellavita · 28/01/2010 17:15

This would be my idea of hell.

Personally (not that I ever have had one) but if my child wanted a pool party, I would make sure I had enough family helpers to come rather than asking the parents. To me, if you organise a party then you supply the help.

BendyBob · 28/01/2010 17:15

OMG Yanbu! I'd hate it too.

I've said no persuaded dc away from having pool parties. Exposure of flabby bits plus the worry of someone drowning (on top of all the other party angst you get with birthdays) has crossed them off my list.

Dh usually does any stuff along these lines where required. I wouldn't. I'm sure that'll be 'judged wanting' by some. Oh well. I make up for it in other ways

ZZZenAgain · 28/01/2010 17:15

is it two whole classes who have been invited then?

Jamieandhismagictorch · 28/01/2010 17:16

YANBU

I'd send DH

Eve4Walle Landsend do fab swimming costumes for all shapes and sizes. But the aren't cheap. They are really good quality, so for an investment ....

www.landsend.co.uk

TheCrackFox · 28/01/2010 17:16

YANBU. I have no desire to display my white flabby flesh. TBh I hate swimming at the best of times.