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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not let DD go to this swimming party...

124 replies

Eve4Walle · 28/01/2010 17:01

because it states on the invite that I'll have to get in the water with her?

Invite is from a very nice little boy in her class, who is having a joint pool party with another little boy in the next class.

The Mums at school are generally a nice bunch but I really can't face getting my flabby bits out in front of them and being judged, as I undoubtedly will (as will all the other Mums). DH has already said he won't take her so what am I to do?

OP posts:
bibbitybobbityhat · 28/01/2010 19:47

Fantastic! Your Dad sounds like a real gem!

Angeliz · 28/01/2010 19:49

Lovely Grandad

deaddei · 28/01/2010 19:54

Hope he's CRB checked

madamearcati · 28/01/2010 20:02

swimming parties are a dads job round here

carrieboo75 · 28/01/2010 20:05

I got to this thread a bit late but if you are still looking for a good swimsuit for another time then I can recommend the miricle suit, it's claim is it takes 10 pounds off in seconds. It comes in various styles and is fab.

Heated · 28/01/2010 20:06

Really dislike noisy indoor public pools where you have to keep moving to ward of hypothermia &, since having dcs, I'm more likely to pee in the pool than the toddlers

Fortunately, it's Dh is taking dd to a pool party in a few weeks, he doesn't mind a bit, but did wonder how many declined.

inmypants · 28/01/2010 20:34

Oh dear

well I have to confess I have just organised a party at my local pool for DS who will be 7 - we will have whole pool which is mainly massive slide and inflatables. As DS has been desperate to do it finally given in and will be booking,
I will be inviting his whole year group (around 30 kids) and there needs to be 1 adult to every 2 children so I will be expecting mums and/or dads to do their bit....

Its great fun IMO

Wish you could all come!

nickytwotimes · 28/01/2010 20:41

Oh, I'd go happily.

Our old toddler group booked a wee pool once for a little party and we were all in the water together.

I think everyone there was as self-conscious as each other and I know I certainly wasn't comparing myself to the other parents. I did envy a few of the swim suits that were really nice though.

BarkisIsWilling · 28/01/2010 20:46

"wee pool" really cracked me up! made me think of wee in the pool

nickytwotimes · 28/01/2010 20:47

It probably was with all those toddlers.

LuckyJim · 28/01/2010 20:50

I've been to one pool party but didn't get in as I'd just given birth so had bleeding, leaking nipples, stitches etc.

Because it was obvious that I wouldn't be able to get in then someone kindly offered to supervise ds. There are so many reasons to decline that I wouldn't have one for ds because he would be upset if his friends didn't go.

I swim quite a lot but I can't use tampons so can't swim during af. Some people have gynea probs that mean they bleed all the time and that might mean they can't swim. Some people won't have a cossie that fits. Some people can't find childcare for their other dcs and obviously can't bring them along. It is a bigger effort than a more conventional party but they are lots of fun too.

ZZZenAgain · 28/01/2010 21:06

I'm loving some of your more graphic explanations there lucky.

WingedVictory · 28/01/2010 21:47

Yes, I was about the sugghest lands' end. Have a look at the swim skirts here. You can search by "anxiety zone", if you like.

WingedVictory · 28/01/2010 21:50

suggest

Gah!

CheerfulYank · 29/01/2010 02:44

What a wonderful Dad!

Allets · 29/01/2010 05:08

Good job you lot don't live in Australia - you'd be doomed. Pool parties abound.

Seriously - and I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but are you really that hung up on what you look like.

I am not exactly what you'd call slender (quite the opposite) and I could not give a monkeys about what people think about me.

Imagine how much your little one would enjoy this, isn't that more important than your vanity?

cornsilk · 29/01/2010 05:13

You could wear a wet suit.

Original poster
Eve4Walle · 29/01/2010 06:08

Loving the wetsuit idea. Would I not look a tin bit mad though?

OP posts:
Original poster
Eve4Walle · 29/01/2010 06:08

Tiny!

OP posts:
picklepud · 29/01/2010 07:21

YANBU There are other parties to have and it shows a huge insensitivity to how people might feel about their bodies.

evensunnierdelight · 29/01/2010 08:23

Paranoia about bodies aside (and I'm with you there!), I think it's totally unreasonable to expect anyone else to have to participate to that extent in a party you want to hold for your child. You ask friends if they would help supervise, if you can't find enough willing VOLUNTEERS to get in the water you do something else.

I do live in Australia, and yes, pool parties abound, but nobody has ever told me I had to get in the water to supervise my child. That's the responsibility of the person holdidng the party and if I'm not happy about supervision ratios I'll watch from the side.

Morloth · 29/01/2010 08:25

I second LandsEnd for swimwear. There are even suits where you can adjust the coverage for the occasion.

Bear in mind though evensunnier more Aussie kids can swim at 5 than British ones, the opportunity just doesn't come up in the same way.

Blondeshavemorefun · 29/01/2010 12:29

well done granddad

inmypants- maybe hire some nannies who will happily get into the pool

as i said before, i have done this with friends

thedollshouse · 29/01/2010 16:04

I turned down a works jolly abroad years ago because I couldn't bear to be seen by my work colleagues in a bikini. This was pre children, I was a size 8 with a good figure back then. I just couldn't handle the thought of discussing work with Dave from Accounts whilst sitting in my bikini. It is a hang up but I can't just get over myself its the way I am.

seeker · 29/01/2010 16:07

So you'll stop your child going to a party because you don't want to wear a swimsuit. As I say to my teenager - no one will be looking at you!

What are you going to say to your child?

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