To feel depressed that exW took DSSs to Miami

[Bonsoir]

for a fortnight at Christmas and for them to have come back having gained a huge new Abercrombie & Fitch wardrobe and 4kgs apiece?

Strix - I don't know anyone who would eat more than a single viennoiserie (croissant, pain au chocolat, pain aux raisins etc) at a single sitting. I can't think it would cross anyone's mind to do so!

Can I just defend Paris here? I live in Paris, and noone I know goes on about weighing their children or having family weigh ins etc. I have never been asked my weight (other than for medical tests) and I do not go around asking people their weight.

It is true the French encourage healthy eating moreso perhaps than in other countries, but those I know (other than some worringly anorexic French women - (who are truly anorexic)) - do not obsess in the way Anna does - if a child gains some weight over the holidays, most think that it will drop off once the child is back on normal healthy meal schedule - parents will ensure this is put in place but those I know would NEVER humiliate their child with weekly weigh ins (whether goal driven or not). SUrely at their ages you can see if they are the appropriate weight without getting out charts on a weekly basis.

It seems to me that Anna lives in a circle, which obsesses over weight and appearance and this would happen whether she was in Shanghai, London or Paris.

I wonder if there is a history of any eating disorders in yor family or your DP's family Bonsoir, that could explain this absolute focus and obsession on weight and appearance.

Still no comment re your DD and the effect this might have on her, I note!

Strix - not trying to be provocative here, but 2 croissants (at least) is overeating. Croissants are high fat foods - you're only "meant" to eat 1. It's precisely the attitude that 2 might be ok which is what leads to creeping weight gain.

Oh what a deliciously barking insight into anna's head. Hilariously insane. Feel v sorry for the children affected by such insanity but some beauts on here.

shophappy - I think you are in denial about the weight thing here as a standard topic of conversation.

And I have answered your question about my DD again and again - yet more denial?

Sorry I must have missed it then -if you don't mind repeating your answer or pointing me to it - how would you feel if your teenage DD is subjected to weekly weigh ins by her father?

We all weight ourselves often already and that will never change! Like I said, it's part of life already.

"Did someone mention earlier in the thread that Bonsoirs husband had had affairs and she forces herself to have sex with him so he will not have another?! I think that says it all really... "

Really? Oh that is just plain . It somehow seems in bad taste to continue to oppose such a weak defendant.

I'm sorry, Anna. I think you have some problems. But, I'm going to bugger off and do some work now because I just feel sorry for you at this moment.

I don't think anyone argues that the DSS's shouldn't lose the extra weight they've gained.

All the argument is about HOW they should do so. Any respectable psychologist and nutritionist, would say that Anna and her DP's method, is wrong.

I doubt if you could find a single registered nutritionist or psychologist, who would recommend the weekly weigh-ins, or the constant criticism of the boy's mother.

But Anna would doubtless say that the psychologist and the nutritionist are wrong.

Basically, what's happening here is that these people are punishing these boys for having had a good time with their mum.

Quite honestly, why is it so different to weigh yourself to any of the other myriad checks that everyone sane person keeps on themselves? Don't you check your bank account? Your children's school marks? Etc, and make little changes if things start to go astray?

You don't need to weigh yourself. You can see what you look like in the mirror and you can feel if your clothes have got tighter.

Anna, sorry came accross as rude / racist. It's just that frowning upon christmas in miami and A&F Ts just made me smirk as such a cliche. Was really refering to a social attitude. St Tropez vs Ile de Re sort of thing. You can interpret that as you wish, not worse than the way you come across in your posts.

Completely agree that people often acquire a smug superiority when they move to France. In certain circles I would add.
Ladybiscuit, that is exactly what I was thinking.

When I moved from Paris to London, It was a real awakening. I was a smug little pest freshly out of a posh law school. Hideous feeling of superiority. Totally unjustified I soon realised because I was not my own person but a pure product of a very Parisian environment.

Am still very french and really I understand what you are saying, but don't try to be more Parisian than the parisians. Please don't loose perspective.

still going on? what a surprise
A classic Anna thread this...
a nice dollop of narcissism?...check
a big wedge of egotism?...check
superior attitude...check
inability to understand or debate in a meaningful way... check
oh, but there's something more....
Desperation...

Here Here HerBeatitude!

Strix - I don't know what that post is about but it is very offensive (as well as being, like much on this thread, a complete fabrication!).

I don't have a husband by the way!

I am FORCED to agree with Anna on croissants. Eating one for lunch is deeply wrong. And the abomination that is the 'crosandwich' (A croissant cut in half and field with ham/cheese tuna) should be a capital crime.

Ingles, add to that a steadfast avoidance of any direct questions or assertions that she knows are true.

Yes actually I agree with her on the croissant thing as well

but of course herbeatitude
she's got her fingers stuffed in her ears chanting "I am right" you know

Mmm mmm croissant sandwiches, with tuna, tomatoes and Laughing Cow - I lived on them when interrailing!

I have never ever got to grips with the posting style that is a fabrication of what another poster has written, followed by a vitriolic condemnation of that fabrication. A very odd sort of debate.

Midori sorry but you are being ridiculous. This is not a case for SS.

I can't get over how rude everyone is on this thread.

Of course two croissants make you feel sick.

People, you're beginning to sound a bit mad. Bonsoir has never suggested anywhere, as far as I know, that her DP has had affairs. It is more likely that she has expressed unpopular views (or more probably expressed herself in an unpopular fashion) about the necessity of a healthy sex life if neither party is to seek satisfaction elsewhere; and this has become "her DP has had an affair".

This cranking up of some kind of hysterical "oooh, I fele sorry for Bonsoir" is loony in and of itself.

Also have to agree with croissants ( and white bread + confiture) being an abomination.