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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that narcissism is the current MN buzzword.

192 replies

OrmIrian · 26/11/2009 16:57

Never seen it on MN until a few months ago. And now it's everywhere!

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LeninGrad · 26/11/2009 20:49

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OrmIrian · 26/11/2009 20:52

leningrad for example is borderline narcissistic

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VengefulKitty · 26/11/2009 20:52

Actually, to be serious for a moment(in light of my earlier post), NPD is a genuine diagnosed psychopathic disorder. There is an ICD-10 code for it.

OrmIrian · 26/11/2009 20:54

Yes I am sure it is. But do all the people who use the term on MN actually have a diagnosis?

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Arsed · 26/11/2009 20:55

It's the new 'passive agressive'

VengefulKitty · 26/11/2009 20:58

Oh I very mush doubt it OrmIrian. I just classified myself as narcissistic for being vain!

But no, like a recent controversial thread, people can and will apply labels to themselves without professional diagnosis.

In answer to your OP, YANBU to think it may be the current "in label" if I may paraphrase, but everyone that does label him/herself is BU.

BitOfFun · 26/11/2009 20:58

I tend to find that people who piss me off fall into one of two camps: selfish nobboids, or thoughtless nobboids. That usually covers it, IME.

VengefulKitty · 26/11/2009 20:58

It just devalues real diagnoses

VengefulKitty · 26/11/2009 20:58

hahahahaha : BOF!!!!

OrmIrian · 26/11/2009 21:00

Actually few people really piss me off. But self-obsessed nobboids who take themselves too seriously do.

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LeninGrad · 26/11/2009 21:12

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TheShriekingHarpy · 26/11/2009 21:13

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BitOfFun · 26/11/2009 21:15

It wouldn't happen in a Parisian salon, you know...

zazen · 26/11/2009 21:24

I think you're a liddle bit behind the times, actually - that NPD thread has been going for years it seems.
And it is a very worthy thread which helps those who have had the misfortune to meet some of these absolutely dreadful people, and be used by them.

Mocking's catching IMO.
Hear hear Janos.

Thank your lucky stars you haven't met a narc., and if that sounds seriously nobboid, so be it.

A narc stole 20 years of my sister's life: she's only recently got some breathing space, by divorcing him, but has to stay in a foreign country (his) because of his obsession to punish her with custody and maintenance battles.

You are very lucky to have only heard of this now.

OrmIrian · 26/11/2009 21:25

If you say so zazen.

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zazen · 26/11/2009 21:27

I do Orm. How's Earthsea?

OrmIrian · 26/11/2009 21:29

earthsea would be lovely. Wish I was there right now.

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MrsMattie · 26/11/2009 21:30

Thing is, you read this posts about people with 'narcisisstic personality disorder' (always about men...funny that!) and you just think 'nasty, abusive tosspots'.

I vote we go back to calling these fuckwits just that. Call a spade a spade and all that.

Ronaldinhio · 26/11/2009 21:30

I thought it was France......

zazen · 26/11/2009 21:31

I'm off to find it. I quite fancy an evening in Roke.

OrmIrian · 26/11/2009 21:32

Me too! I always find these fantasy worlds so much more appealing than reality. And it rains less.

Would be nice to see real dragons once in a while

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LeninGrad · 27/11/2009 12:13

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SausageRocket · 27/11/2009 12:14

every feckers got it

gettingagrip · 27/11/2009 17:43

What a nasty thread.

I have lived my whole 50 years with people with personality disorders.

I only found out about NPD three years ago, and knowing that it exists and is a real disorder has saved my life. I was suicidal several times due to the abuse I suffered at the hands of my mother and father and sister...so no, it is not always men...and if you had read the threads written by absolutely desperate victims you would know that.

OF course it is rarely diagnosed, because by definition Ns do not think there is anything wrong with them!

Do you think psychopaths are made-up by nutters on MN? Because, actually, Ns and psychopaths share the same PHYSICAL changes in their brains....which can be seen on scans. So similar are they that it is now being mooted that they are actually on the same spectrum of disorder, and not different PDs at all.

You should all be ashamed of yourselves for this thread. Would you start a thread mocking someone with a learning difficulty or cancer for example? Just because it seems to be in the news on MN doesn't meant that it is a joke.

It has only recently been discovered, and there are alot of Ns about!!

Their victims have absolutely terrible lives. When your family have these disorders you often go on to have partners with them too. For the children of Ns life is hell on earth.

Shame on you all

Jamieandhismagictorch · 27/11/2009 18:18

Thing is, you could say "every feckers got it" about lots of things which are under-recognised and misunderstood, like many mental health problems, like Aspergers, like post natal depression. Talking about these things, using these terms has helped lots of people (although I suppose some would argue that overusing a term devalues it - eg - people who say they've got a migraine when actually it's a headache).

If a label helps people to understand something, to see it as a pattern of behaviour, and maybe get help coping with it from other people who have suffered, then what's the harm ?

I have also noticed the terms "toxic" and NPD used quite a lot on MN, but I've thought that there's lots of things that I've been lucky enough not to have experienced. I don't doubt they exist.