AIBU in thinking that nowadays

[TheUsefulSuspect]

everyone has to have an excuse or label for any problem

Kids who misbehave are all ADHD

Blokes who are mistreat women and children are either NPD or Depressed

Women who lose the plot are either depressed or got PND

Kids who are simply a bit thick all have some sort of dyslexia

I think this simply excuses kids who are badly parented, blokes who are scume bags, women who are bonkers and kids who are stupid, and it takes away time, focus amd resources from people and children with genuine problems.

"We tend to pick up on genuine examples of children with dyslexia/ADHD during a child?s time in school because as teachers we can recognise the signs.."

Right.

Where is the evidence that everyone has to have an excuse or label for any problem? Seems something of a sweeping generalisation to me.

There may be some overdiagnosis, but also probably quite a lot of underdiagnosis. Why are diagnoses to do with the mind, brain, learning etc. deemed to be made up?

Its just this sort of stigma, and words like 'bonkers' and 'losing the plot' which stop people seeking help when they need it.

Its bad enough having these things without having to deal with the common idea that anyone who has them is making it up.

"There may be some overdiagnosis, but also probably quite a lot of underdiagnosis."

I know too many people who've gone a long time without being diagnosed as depressed, etc. for me to believe there are more cases overdiagnosed than the other way round.

Sorry I worded my messages badly I consider myself suitably chastised, but I am glad I'm not the only one who can see it.

i do hope none of these "I work with" people work at my dd's school

Maybe when someone says they are diagnosed with something, you should then ask what treatment/advice the doctor gave them.

I do understand, my dad has coeliacs disease, it took them a while to diagnose it and I had to watch him wasting away in front of me. So it drives me nuts when someone claims to be allergic to wheat/gluten when they actually aren't.

It's the self diagnosis that drive me mad.

I think OP has a point, there are many genuine sufferers of all of the above problems, but many claim to have these also....not sure about PND.

I knew a boy on Ritalin which made sure he was quieter because neither parent wanted him, they were separated. His behaviour was normal for a boy pushed from pillar to post unwanted.

If you're going to self-diagnose you should at least print a label. Correctly spelt, please.

I have untidy house disorder.

I think the OP has a point too. Thankfully more people with these conditions are being properly diagnosed now rather than labelled as "naughty" or "thick" but the flipside is that those who are genuinely just badly behaved or not as bright blame these conditions too.

If you recognise that ADHD is a genuine condition, as are Depression, P.N.D, dyslexia, autism, aspergers etc etc

How can it be an excuse or label for any problem?

Fuck me, do you know how long it takes and how difficult it is to get a diagnosis of ADHD or autism and what it involves?

They dont dish them out like sweeties, you know!

Claw - Tsk tsk! Don't you know that you just take them to the GP, say that you think your child has SN, and they give you a framed diagnosis and DLA for life.

"bonkers"? nice.

Where I work its actually more common for parents to deny/find it hard to accept that their child has a disorder/condition etc.

Who can blame them? A diagnosis is often devastating however unexpected.

I suprised myself by bursting into tears when it was confirmed DS had something I had suspected for a couple of years .

I am a bit embarrassed about telling people. Not because I am ashamed of DS, more that I think they will asssume I am making up something instead of saying 'he is thick' or covering up my bad parenting.

I am sure there are parents who make stuff up but I think there is a bit of urban mythery going on too. Where are the hoards of self diagnosing adhd, asd parents? I think I would have met loads by now as I work in a Child Development Centre.

And I can honestly say I have not met one yet.

Coppertop, thank god you are here, my humour failed me and i actually took this thread serious for a second!

If you cant see it or touch it, it doesnt exist, right

chegirl "Where are the hoards of self diagnosing adhd, asd parents?"

Livejournal.

Dont understand Morloth

Sorry was being cheeky.

Livejournal is a blogging/messageboard site. Where everyone appears to have some sort of condition (or their children do).

It is not physically possible for the number of people who say they have these problems on livejournal (always self diagnosed you understand, they don't believe doctors) to actually have them. Civilisation would have collapsed totally years ago.

The internet can give a skewed version of reality.

The urge to yell "GOOGLE IS NOT A DIAGNOSTIC TOOL" is sometimes very strong.

Ok I understand now

Not denying there are people who do it. Internet is different in that its easy to sit there and type in 'i think my lo has add,asd,whatever and someone will answer.

Its a much bigger step to seek out a real life diagnosis.

But yeah - there are some weirdos out there.

Morloth - I have no knowledge of livejournal, is it a some sort of anti-doctor site?

I think the OP has a valid point to be honest, No one can ever be a bad person these days there always has to be a reason why "its not their fault" and people who genuinely have problems do get over looked sometimes.

It has taken my friend 6 long years to get a diagnosis on her son through the school, because they simply have too many people convinced that their child has a condition that in the 1970 would have been called little shits syndrome.

I know people who will happily tell you that their child has XZY and that is why they are rude, spiteful or something, Oh so and so hits cause he has XYZ NO so and so hits because at the age of 8 you let him watch/play 18 certificate games/videos and you excuse everything he does.

I have a SN child who Yesterday threw a chair across a class room, is that because he has SN? No it was because he was angry and he was wrong to do it, this is what I told the school and this is why DS1 is being punished at school and at home.

Even the people with "labels" should step up to the play sometimes and not hide behind them

This is a very mean-spirited thread.

Essentially some people are arguing that parents are haing their children diagnosed out of laziness/munchausens by proxy/attention seeking delusions. Yet conversely people on here also believe that they personally have amazing psychic powers of diagnosing children they barely know as not having special needs. Either that or MN is populated by people with PHDs in educational psychlogy who are capable of passing comment on the alleged pseudo-condtions of others.

Nice.