"Two years of nature projects, toddler groups, baking biscuits and braving the science museum did me in".
Christ - I've never done things like this.
I preferred to crawl around expensive shops with my young'uns, laughing at the hideous handbags and experimenting with the perfumes and make up. Or lying on the sofa together watching old cartoons and eathing biscuits. Or visiting my mum to hang out with her to chat about .... oh, all sorts of rubbish, just enjoying being with her and my children (my mum is going to be 80 soon and I treasure every minute with her, and watching her with my kids).
"I craved long, meaningful adult conversation, meaty intellectual work, a reason to wear nice clothes"
Are all the mums you know fembots or something? I know a great bunch of fellow parents - very diverse, from those who run their own businesses, to nurses, academics, and teenage mums on benefits with half a dozen kids, who I see every morning down at the school gates. When I was at work full time I only ever used to talk to people in the same field - teaching. YAWN! We talk about all sorts and make each other fall about laughing.
"a bit of status, money that was mine...so many things."
Ah well, you can't have everything can you? Most of us can scrape together enough to have lunch together every now and again, and buy our kids christmas presents. No expensive cars though, or designer clothes. But then - who cares? The women I meet at the school gates often look amazing, though they buy their clothes from market stalls and ebay. You don't have to have money to have fun with fashion!
"I just genuinely found it mind numbing after a while",
Don't you read novels? Or take photographs or draw? Or read newspapers? Or volunteer? Christ - I'm NEVER bored. Even when I have to do piles of washing up or laundry I have a book on CD to listen to, or something on BBC iplayer to enjoy.
"and couldn't imagine not working while I am young enough and strong enough and energetic enough to do it".
As for having a fulfilling career while working - yes, I'm sure some people do. But despite having bags of confidence, I only have a certain amount of energy and if I'm putting 50 hours a week into paid employment, I realistically won't have much left over to run my household or spend on my children. I'd just be too knackered, unless I could persuade someone else to take over running my home most of the time and looking after my children before, during and after school, as I wouldn't be home until 6pm (and my youngest goes to bed at 7pm) .
I appreciate some people do do it and enjoy it - most of the women I know who manage it (particularly those with 3 or 4 young children) are fearsomely organised, very energetic, and (more to the point) rarely stop to draw breath. I've tried it and I found it terrifying - my whole life was scheduled down to the last minute, trying to fit everything in, and the days and weeks flew by in a blur of work, work, work. I felt like someone was pressing the fast-forward button on my life. I had to drop my studies, didn't read a book for a month, stopped all my creative hobbies, and was asleep dribbling on the sofa by 10pm every night........ What sort of life is that?