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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel smug??

62 replies

twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:24

I think i am......

Ok so the story goes ive just recently lost 5 stone (got a couple more stone to go) and am,for the first time in years shopping in "normal" clothes shops, NOW out shopping yesterday im standing in a shop fingering through the "normal" sized clothes rails and looking over to the plus sized rails feeling really smug watching the ladies choose their big baggy cover ups.

i feel dreadfull for even thinking like this,that was me a few weeks ago.... but i cant help but feel smug!

I am BU arent i??

OP posts:
LoveBeingAMummy · 20/08/2009 09:27

Well done for losing the weight but i'm going to back out of the thread now.

BunnyLebowski · 20/08/2009 09:28

YABU

You should feel proud not smug.

Think back to a few years ago when you were bigger. How would you have felt knowing that someone was looking at you out shopping and feeling smug that they weren't like you?? Pretty horrible I imagine.

Congratulations on the weight loss but leave the smuggery with the cream cakes.

ilove · 20/08/2009 09:30

You just made all big people realise that the paranoia they have about people looking down on them is true and not in their heads. And I speak as someone who has lost 11 stones.

allaboutme · 20/08/2009 09:30

YANBU to feel pleased at how well you have done at all.
The fact that you feel dreadful about feeling smug shows that you are pleased about your achievement NOT pleased the other women are bigger than you iyswim
Well done on losing the weight

Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:32

Oh i do feel really proud aswell but i literally could not help the smug feeling

i know im BU and do feel dreadfull for it.

few years ago?! few weeks ago! maybe the smuggery will adjust as i go further along my weight loss/brain correction journey.....

OP posts:
Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:35

allaboutme, yes you said what i am thinking. thanks for putting it like that.

ilove. its not actually paranoia though is it? it happens, ive been there,im still there. its not right,its not fair but its there and it happens..

OP posts:
ilove · 20/08/2009 09:36

Yes it does happen. From people who should know better!

harleyd · 20/08/2009 09:38

ooh bitchy

Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:39

Ilove the point i tried to make is that its not paranoia,ive been on both sides of teh scales, battled anorexia and bullimia for years and morbidly obese up until a few weeks ago....i know the paranoia i know that people talk i know what its like......

read my op again.....do i feel proud of the smuggey? do i like the feeling?
No...

OP posts:
lljkk · 20/08/2009 09:40

You may well get your comeupppance, OP, and become fat again (fatter than before, even). Do not revel in smuggery or you will live to regret it!

Stigaloid · 20/08/2009 09:40

YANBU - smug away - you achieved something and are proud of it. As long as you don't show smug face to other people then be smug. You are allowed.

Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:42

lijkk...."revel in smuggery"
please point out where i have "revelled" in it???

OP posts:
Stigaloid · 20/08/2009 09:43

smug  /
?adjective, smugâ‹…ger, smugâ‹…gest. 1. contentedly confident of one's ability

Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:44

stigaloid....love the name!

OP posts:
Katisha · 20/08/2009 09:44

Well done though twinkle - how did you do it? Lose the weight I mean?

piscesmoon · 20/08/2009 09:46

Be as smug as you like! Well done!

Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:47

Thank you Katisha,
im still doing it,got a couple more stone to lose. im having councilling as have suffered from eating disorders for all of my adult life. and am follwing a VLCD.
Its working for me.

OP posts:
Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:47

counselling*

OP posts:
jumpingbeans · 20/08/2009 09:50

Well done with the weight loss, but bloody hell, you are making yourself sound quite "up your own arse" as a yoyo dieter myself, i hope you never find yourself back on the fat rails again, looking over at the " normals"

MrsToffeeCrisp · 20/08/2009 09:50

Congratulations on the weight loss! It's a great feeling, I was like a different person after losing 3 stone.

Feel free to be openly very proud and secretly smug!!

IsItMeOr · 20/08/2009 09:52

Well done on getting so far towards your goal, that can't have been easy.

I think that what makes us good people is not the fact that we never think anything we think is unworthy of us, but we choose to filter it before letting anybody else hear/see it. I suspect you just wanted to post this because you were a bit taken aback to feel this way? Doesn't make you a bad person imo.

theDMplagiarisedLeonie · 20/08/2009 09:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Kayzr · 20/08/2009 09:54

This is why I do my clothes shopping online. The thought of someone whether intentionally or not looking at me and feeling smug would probably make me cry.

WhereTheWildThingsWere · 20/08/2009 09:55

I don't think YABU as long as you keep it to yourself.

I stopped smoking through the Allen Carr method and smuggery towards smokers along with quite a lot of pity and disgust was positively encoraged as a way to never slip back to your old ways.

I think thinking like this is actually quite healthy and helpful as long as it is never externalized hence making someone else feel bad about themselves, which is why lots of people are going to say YABU.

Well done on the weight loss.

Original poster
twinkletoescare · 20/08/2009 09:56

isitmeor yes i suppose thats why i posted,its been playing on my mind since shopping yesterday and your right i was and am a bit taken aback by it.
i think my op states clearly that i dont like feeling smug but cant help it.... who knows why? maybe its just part of my journey..

OP posts: