I was recently quite excited to get an email from my SIL that seemed to be inviting my DH and me to a 40th birthday celebration dinner with our mutual group of friends. As most of us now have children we don't get together as couples too often nowadays, so I was really pleased. However, at the end was a sentence saying 'Susy, I'm not inviting you and DH as you are having tea with us, the in-laws and DCs one afternoon instead'. This breaks up our group of mutual friends, and makes me feel that as an in-law I am not fit to be seen in proper adult company. I feel really disappointed and wish that she'd found another way of telling me, instead of humiliating me in front of our friends by adding the note to an e-mail that went to everyone. I'm sure you'll be able to come up with some alternative ideas to help me put this in perspective.