Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that some mothers are just shit

145 replies

tommypickles · 03/07/2009 14:23

The other day at sainsburys I was walking back to my car with the shopping and my kids.

The car parked next to me had 2 small boys in the back in their car seats.

Boy 1 must have been about 1 and crying his eyes out.

Boy 2 was about 3 or 4 with his hands covering his ears because of brothers screams!

My son who is 4 said to me "oh that baby is crying whats wrong?"

I said "well they're on their own darling, I think he probably wants his mummy"

So I stood there for a couple of minutes, dumb stuck to be honest, wondering what to do and how people could do this sort of thing.

The mum then showed up with at least 2 bags of shopping in each hand, calling to the boy (through the open window which any weirdo could have snatched them), "oh it's ok mummy's here".

Well, I gave her the look and loudly (so she could hear) discussed with my children how you should not leave children alone in the car.

Now I know how some people will try to look at this from both sides, but trust me she was not just returning her trolley or anything like that. And she must have been in the shop some time to fill at least 4 bags with shopping.

Now, she wasn't the sort of person you would assume, she was well into her 30's, nice new 4x4....very middle class.

I did take her registration number because at one point I wondered if I should call the police, do you think I should still report her?

OP posts:
MsSparkle · 03/07/2009 16:12

I don't think shouting at your kids when you are at your limit makes you a bad mother, it just makes you human!

clemette · 03/07/2009 16:13

I once saw two children asleep in a car in a Sainsbury's carpark. I reported it to Customer Services and they tannoyed the woman (kindly telling her that it was me who had mentioned it ). I don't think she was a shit mother - I assume she had had a difficult day and had made the wrong decision. I didn't judge her (though she did swear at me quite a lot) but I reported her because I thought what she had done at that moment was wrong.
I think it is poor parenting to not show your own children that if they feel something is wrong they should report it to the proper authorities but I don't think you are a shit mother - I just think you also made a mistake.

As an aside, your other mistake was this comment:
"Now, she wasn't the sort of person you would assume, she was well into her 30's, nice new 4x4....very middle class". It reveals a great deal about your prejudices (and lack of social awareness) which is why you have had such hostile responses. I am well into my 30s, middle class and drive a nice car (though it isn't a planet killer) and I also have been known to make mistakes as a parent!!

Some people are crap parents, but you cannot tell from one incident.

FenellaFudge · 03/07/2009 16:14

(Nothing to get Morloth, just wittering )

Original poster
tommypickles · 03/07/2009 16:15

Well since I've bearly had one decent reply to the question of should I do anything, I'm going to make the dinner. You lot can all carry on squabbling back and fourth between yourselves, since none of you seem to have anything better to do.

Yes I am fairly new to this site and don't use it very regular (but that definately says more about you than me) so to all you yocals who are never off of it, you can have it back now, I'm off to live in the real world. Some of you should try it sometime.

The weido country folk always hate it when there's a newcomer in town, I should think myself lucky that I've escaped before any of you came running after me, dragging one of your feet behind you, wearing your dungerees and eyes twitching.

OP posts:
Morloth · 03/07/2009 16:16

ooooh are you flouncing now?

DisturbinglySexuallyInactive · 03/07/2009 16:16

Are you a bit thick?

FenellaFudge · 03/07/2009 16:16

Rofl!!

Bravo, Tommy

Lizzylou · 03/07/2009 16:17

LOL @ Tommy

You'll be back (said in Arnie Terminator stylee)

It's Yokels btw

FenellaFudge · 03/07/2009 16:17

By DisturbinglySexuallyInactive on Fri 03-Jul-09 16:16:41
Are you a bit thick?

Are you 12?

OrmIrian · 03/07/2009 16:17

If it is a flounce it's quite a good one

Lizzylou · 03/07/2009 16:18

I agree, Orm, tis impressive, which is why Tommy'll be on again before long.

Now I am settling down to watch the sub-plot bird row which is emerging....

GYo · 03/07/2009 16:19

Tommy, wasnt farnham sainsburys was it?

FenellaFudge · 03/07/2009 16:19

It is one of the best flounces I've seen - love the dragging foot and twitchy eye thing.

I think you're great Tommy.

DisturbinglySexuallyInactive · 03/07/2009 16:21

Fenella - I wasn't sure if she was genuinely thick or if it was a clever piece of caricature complete with creative spelling. Am probably nowhere even near 12 yet in terms of mental and emotional maturity though

Morloth · 03/07/2009 16:21

I saw dungerees in the shops the other day, had a serious flashback moment.

PrincessToadstool · 03/07/2009 16:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PrincessToadstool · 03/07/2009 16:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

clemette · 03/07/2009 16:23

Given the entertainment value of the flounce I shall refrain from correcting all those spelling mistakes

PS I answered your question - you should have done more.

Confuzzeled · 03/07/2009 16:23

Very impressive flounce.

Honestly, you think your getting a hard time. I posted on AIBU last week and got a new arsehole ripped, but I'm still here because this place is bloody addictive.

Lizzylou · 03/07/2009 16:25

Tommy will be on a Bumsex thread this evening, you mark my words.

Tommy, you're funny

Morloth · 03/07/2009 16:25

I think it was TopShop Princess - I did consider it, but I think the rule is 'If you wore it the first time around, you are too old the next time'.

Nancy66 · 03/07/2009 16:27

confuzzeled: ouch.

Were you the one that didn't buy any shopping when your mum came to stay? You did get roasted (not in the footballer sense)

clemette · 03/07/2009 16:27

Do good mothers shop in Topshop or is that a shit mother's shop?

zeke · 03/07/2009 16:29

let's just hope that she picked up on your disgust and never does it again.

I guess the '4x4' and 'middle-class' comments have already been ripped to threads enough!

BelleWatling · 03/07/2009 16:29

I am a bit slow ... I would have thought a 4x4 would make one MORE inclined to anti-social behaviour, not less...if she had been driving a Prius or a classic Beetle maybe... although it appears you do live in the country where I understand 4 x 4 s are acceptable???

I don't know why people can't just have their shopping delivered. Then they won't be judged on the internet.