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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want school to think Father's Day is important too

62 replies

biffandchip · 19/06/2009 23:13

For Mother's Day I got a card from DS1 (Y2), a card from DS2 (YFS) and a card and present from DS3 (Nursery). Why is it then that there was one Father's Day card from DS2 brought home from school and nothing from DS1 or DS3. Do schools tread carefully bearing in mind the number of children who might not be in contact with their father. I must say, whatever the reason I am disappointed and feel like it devalues the role of the father. I think I will raise it with the teachers next week.

OP posts:
cookielove · 19/06/2009 23:14

its because we all forgot!!!! i apologise for all teachers nursery nurses e.t.c that forgot we're SORRY

2shoes · 19/06/2009 23:15

isn't it cos mothers day is a religious thing, where as fathers day isn't?

hf128219 · 19/06/2009 23:15

It's arecent and an american phenomenen.

hf128219 · 19/06/2009 23:15

It's arecent and an american phenomenen.

Original poster
biffandchip · 19/06/2009 23:16

don't think mother's day is religious

OP posts:
2shoes · 19/06/2009 23:16

mothering sunday

FAQinglovely · 19/06/2009 23:17
  1. Because it's an American traditional thing - not at all linked with Mothers day (well it is in the US - but Mothers day in the US has different origins from the UK one
  1. Possibly because there is less risk of causing upset by sending Mothers Day cards in terms of absent Mothers than there is with fathers??

(both pure speculation)

Original poster
biffandchip · 19/06/2009 23:17

Recent I've been sending cards for 40yrs so its not like it was concocted a few months ago

OP posts:
hf128219 · 19/06/2009 23:18

Eh?? Mothering Sunday honours the Virgin Mary.

Snorbs · 19/06/2009 23:19

I know what you mean and it's not just schools. My DS did a Mother's Day card at Cubs, DD did one at Brownies and decorated a fairy cake as a present, and they both did other cards at after-school school club. Father's Day? Nothing.

Chuffinnora · 19/06/2009 23:19

I will stick to my it's Father's Day every day mantra but... I agree. Neither DD or DS have done anything in school for DH, but I had a plant grown for me, lots of cards and various other stuff

pointydog · 19/06/2009 23:19

very likely there are children in the class who have no or little coitact with dad. The teachers might know more about the home lives of the children than you.

Cgildren can make things at home too. Does it have to be at school?

FAQinglovely · 19/06/2009 23:20

well that depends on whether you're Catholic or Protestant hf (but that's another thread LOL).

Rollergirl1 · 19/06/2009 23:20

Awww, he has a lovely fathers day card, and a big bag and, a big fathers day sign thing. hmmmn. Night.

pointydog · 19/06/2009 23:21

father's day is a made-up copncept. Why do we want other people to do things with our own children? Do something together

Galava · 19/06/2009 23:22

Mothers day is to celebrate returning to the mother church in the spring. A christian tradition.

Fathers day on the other hand is commercialism.

Snorbs · 19/06/2009 23:22

PointyDog, my children have only irregular contact with their mother (and I know that she wouldn't encourage my DCs to make me a Fathers Day card), and the school knows that.

Original poster
biffandchip · 19/06/2009 23:23

We have done stuff together, it's just that some of the school stuff I've had has been fab and it would be nice for dp to get something of that quality, rather than the tat I am capable of helping them cobble together

OP posts:
hf128219 · 19/06/2009 23:24

FAQ- it's still a christian festival!

pointydog · 19/06/2009 23:25

you didnt say thaye did somethine at school, snorbs.

It is such a sensitive issue that I would be surprised if the children wren't given free choice to decide who the card was for (eg gran). If not, then yes, it is insensitive

Snorbs · 19/06/2009 23:25

Also, whether or not Mother's Day has religious roots, that's not how it's generally regarded or celebrated today.

JudyBlume1019 · 19/06/2009 23:25

it's because fathers' day was invented by the card companies or somesuch, but more importantly, this year it's my birthday

cookielove · 19/06/2009 23:26

i think just because mothering sunday is to do with the church ( which i do not believe in) and fathers day is comercial it doesn't make it any less valid, should fathers not be celebrated are they not as important as mothers???

pointydog · 19/06/2009 23:26

agree re that point, snorn

Mumofagun · 19/06/2009 23:27

Mothers Day is religious and coincides with the fourth Sunday in Lent. Father's day American, hence.....
As for the comment about the predominant amount of children to a single parent being brought up by a single MOTHER, yes this is the case and yes I would hope personally the schools take this into account. Until DS reached primary school (not Infants), I have dreaded Fathers day in case they were MADE to make cards etc because of the implications. What if it prompts the question in true Jeremy Kyle fashion " Who is my Dad mum?" Yes I know this is not the ideal, and it is not my case either, BUT, it is a fact and one that needs to be considered in this day and age. Maybe I watch too much day time TV. But no, it was not something I wanted to have to deal with.