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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not give a flying feck about troll but to find the troll spotters irratating

189 replies

chevre · 17/06/2009 09:40

all this 'interesting first post 66mumtodaisy?' followed by the obligatory ghastly eyebrow emoticon. is driving me fecking nuts.

OP posts:
Jumente · 17/06/2009 20:16

LadyAga please try to bear in mind that you might hurt people's feelings with a comment like that. There must be a gentler way to put it.

theycallmelofty · 17/06/2009 20:17

Well if this thread has acheived stopping just one troll hunter it was worth it

Jumente · 17/06/2009 20:18

Still waiting for my link to a competition Lofty.

theycallmelofty · 17/06/2009 20:19

LadyAga there was nothing wrong with your post and I agree with you completly - they are foolish

Qally · 17/06/2009 20:23

Thing is, trolls like drama. They genuinely don't give a fuck how incendiary things get. So troll hunters arriving and laying in, and others arguing over whether it's real, is a bonus. The primary aim of trolls is to stir, and the gold medal, as far as they're concerned, isn't when everyone turns on them (acceptable as that is) it's when everyone turns on each other. Troll hunters are giving them what they want in spades.

Also... you're baring your soul publicly on a huge site. Often in a long-term archive. If it's too personal for a troll, perhaps it's too personal for an open forum?

Finally, some people are going to be accused of trolling when they're just dealing with something horrifying, are vulnerable, and need support. How is that better than some trolls getting away with it a little longer? Surely if it's got to the point that something must be said, a simple "I'm truly sorry if I'm wrong but I think this is a troll, and I'm leaving the thread" would be better from every perspective?

theycallmelofty · 17/06/2009 20:27

here is one Jumente

With all the talk, 'I spotted that one', I 'reported that one' blah blah

But the real competitiveness goes on during the actual thread the supposed troll is on - who can shout troll first or report it first

LadyAga · 17/06/2009 20:28

This is an internet forum where people can post their views and ideas not a private counselling service.

If people are going to open up and share private and personal information on topics in which they may have unresolved issues then they have to accept they are taking a risk.

My intention is not to hurt anyone's feelings, but I am a very straight-talking to the point person. Truthfully, although I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, and would prefer not to... if I do, I don't care and I don't see it as my problem.

If you are someone who can be hurt by the comments made by a complete stanger whom you will never meet or have any impact on your life then you have problems that you need to address before using these forums.

theycallmelofty · 17/06/2009 20:31
LadyAga · 17/06/2009 20:32

i might be...

theycallmelofty · 17/06/2009 20:37

Oh good

Jumente · 17/06/2009 20:49

Thanks Lofty but I think you might have misconstrued that one...not sure but I think they are trying to communicate which threads they are talking about without naming names, not comparing who has spotted the most iygwim.

I might be wrong. And I don't recall anyone being competitive about it on the actual threads. That would just be facile and pointless.

Qally · 17/06/2009 21:38

"If you are someone who can be hurt by the comments made by a complete stanger whom you will never meet or have any impact on your life then you have problems that you need to address before using these forums."

Oh, I disagree with that. It's human to be hurt by spite. That's the intention, after all. I don't get hurt online now - flameproof and bulletproof - but then, I've been online a long time. I don't think online interaction is normal, because anonymity makes people far more vicious, and prepared to speak in a manner they'd not dream of if they saw the whites of the other person's eyes. Not to mention extraordinarily agitated about stuff that often isn't that essential. It can take a little while to adjust to that, and I sympathise with people who find it rather... startling.

blinks · 17/06/2009 21:45

i hereby suggest removal of the hmm raised eyebrow from the bank of emoticons

i suggest replacing it with any of the following-

  • letting off a fart emoticon
  • not really paying attention emoticon
  • when's eastenders coming on emoticon

i also personally find the envy emoticon a tad sinister.

MaggieBee · 17/06/2009 22:33

I don't think I am foolish and I don't fall in love with people on line either! I had faulty radar on one particular subject due to a chink in my armour..... iyswim

MonkeyMadnessssssssssss · 17/06/2009 23:21

I certainly wasn't referring to people like you MaggieBee.

I was talking about the people who get intensely involved in an individuals situation and even involved in RL situations with them.

I also dont think Ladyaga was refering to you

atigercametotea · 17/06/2009 23:22

I love reading all the troll confrontations! So shoot me!
I find it amusing and at the same time pointless!

It is an anonymous forum with a half hearted registration process with an unlimited opportunity to name change at will - what do you expect?

People take things too seriously sometimes!

I look forward to the next one!

MaggieBee · 17/06/2009 23:23

Oh yes, I knew it wasn't personal, don't worry. Just making the point that people can have sound judgment 99% of the time, and then somehow, I don't know, they're in the eye of the storm or something. Can't explain it.

MaggieBee · 17/06/2009 23:27

Re the registration process, on the other forum I post on, beside your screen name there's a number, so even if you change your name the NUMBER is still the same.

I didn't even SEE the number. ACtually didn't notice there was a number there at all, until there was one convo after I name changed (just to avoid being recognised) and somebody said oh Maggie you've changed your name to Mucky... iyswim.

It does make endless name changing just slightly more laborious. NOt impossible of course.

FenellaFudge · 17/06/2009 23:39

I'm all for suspected trolls getting called on it but only when there's A) reason to believe they are in fact being dishonest and B)when they are drwing people in and other posters are sharing sensitive issues or having their emotional strings pulled.

I dont understand whats going on at the moment - someone posts they have an ingrown toenail and straight away they're met with scepticism. WHY???

Even seen people being 'advised' that now is not the right time to post certain types of question or namechange for sensitive posts.

Getting ridiculous.

psychomum5 · 18/06/2009 00:57

hindsight is a wonderful thing isn;t it, when it comes to talking about trolls, especially confirmed trolls.

and yet at no point was I offered support from anyone bar my real life friends and the few I class as decent friends on here when cvq was going on.

oh yes, now people say it was obvious......why not say it back then??

well, because they didn;t know for sure and didn;t want to look unsympathietic for what sounded like a terribly sad story.

stories that do in fact happen to other people.

we believe them as we think of them as we think of ourselves......I would never even DREAM of making stuff up like trolls do.....so why on earth would I start thinking that they would......makes a mockery of me as a person surely!

now of course, like I said.......hindsight is wonderful.

problem is, it hurt me that deeply, and that harribly, that I have been left with a scar on me (that may sound a little , but being burnt emotionally by anyone leaves marks.....boyfriends, bully at school....even something as dreadful as losing someone to cancer....it all leaves its marks..........this has left one with me).

now, I fully admit I can be a little OTT at times, with anything, especially trolls.....if people don;t like me and my threads tho, you hide me or ignore me. most people here are nice enough and respectful enough to do that. doesn;t bother me.....I don;t like everyone either.....would be a boring world if we were all the same and liked everyone. I just don;t go on their threads, I avoid them.

sadly today tho, I know that some snide cowardly people have been discussing me, and tlaking about me (almost behind my back style like they used to at school.....yoou know, the bullies who aren;t brave enough to do it to yoour face).

they seem to have a jumped up sense of self importance, and are being ugly and vile......like trolls really, who by defination are ugly and vile.

tis a shame.......mumsnet has left a bad taste in my mouth today, on a day wehn I am feling fragile anyway as I am waiting results back on whether I have cancer or not.

there are a few lovely core posters who have not talked badly..............pity that they are overshadowed by the cwardly lot

next time, if someone pisses you off, you really should be big enough to say it on the thread, rather than do a thread about a thread. it is deserving of more respect that way!!

I have never once on this board talked about anyone the way I have been spoken about today, unless they have been a troll, or confirmed troll.

I do hope your smugness doesn;t come to bite you on the arse one day!

sorry for venting on this thread all that should be on the other one......am going to C&P now......and then am bidding MN a farewell for a fw days. I think I need a break from it all while I go look after myself.

MonkeyMadnessssssssssss · 18/06/2009 01:12

You are far too involved in what is essentially just a chat room I think you need back away for more than a few days. I think you need some perspective

Jumente · 18/06/2009 07:40

Oh God Psycho.

I was so hoping you would not see this thread. Some people ought to be ashamed of themselves.

Please come back soon xxx

Lizzylou · 18/06/2009 07:51

Hope that you're OK Psycho.

I think that people can't really understand unless they've been taken in/hurt to the extent that you and some others were. I wasn't really involved with CVQ but I was extremely shocked when she was outed. Likewise Lola tbh, although she didn't suck the lifeblood out of people in the same way as CVQ.

However, I wouldn't want to be a newbie atm. MN must be scary for new posters as everyone seems to be questioning their stories/credentials.

Hope that you are well, Psycho. Take care and come back soon.

LadyAga · 18/06/2009 08:03

Well said MonkeyMadnesssss.

mummyhill · 18/06/2009 08:05

Hey Psycho,

Hope your results come back clear love. By all means take a break if you need to but come back and let us know how you are.

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