to be annoyed at schools and their demands on my time and money

[bogwobbit]

I don't post very often and maybe I am being unreasonable, but.....
I am beginning to get very annoyed at my children's schools and nursery's demands on my time and money.
For example, ds is starting secondary school after the summer. He has had 3 induction days for his new schools, which means he has to be dropped off there at 9:30 in the morning an picked up at 2:30 which would be fair enough if dh and I didn't both work about an hour away and have no family nearby who can help out. So basically it means taking time off work.
Also dd is starting Primary School and had an induction visit. Two days after she visited the school, she gets a letter through the post inviting her to the school for another morning's visit to watch a DVD 'Tour of the School' - yet another day off!!
It's as though schools don't actually realise that not all their children's parents either don't work or have jobs nearby that they can fit in with the various school activities their child might be involved in.
Also I have had to fork out thirty quid for assorted school trips for ds, plus dd's nursery trip plus money for assorted school and nursery photos; new uniforms;
It just seems neverending. AAAAgh.

I think we do to some extent.

My ds is struggling a bit with maths. We go over it at home with him, when he's tired and it's hard to fit in.

They could help him more at school but oh no, it's fun day la la la instead for 6 hours.

PlumpRump - moderation days are when external moderators come in to check the kids' GCSE and A-level coursework - to make sure the teachers are applying the standards evenly etc ... or is this not what you mean?

EvenBetaDad - exactly, of course I don't object to reading to my kids or to being involved in their education, but I think there is a balance to be struck and filling in a comment book daily is overkill, you're absolutely right.

My DH is a secondary school teacher and our kids are younger - and, as he is unable to get involved much with their schooling due to his own teaching commitments, he tends to leave these things to me mostly ... However, his opinion, which he stated the other day "for the record" (his words) is that I am too critical of the teachers; I don't have any idea what it is like to be faced with stroppy, demanding parents all the time; parents are the enemy etc etc .. you get my drift. Which i find pretty incredible really - I mean, aren't the parents and kids the customers here, and shouldn't the teachers be providing excellent customer service??!! He's a lovely man and a very good teacher but he does tend to take the teacher's viewpoint whenever I start ranting! Then again, he doesn't have to fill in the bloody comment book every night, coz at least twice a week he's still at work ... sigh ...

I agree with londonone that the enviro stuff is a government issue and not the teachers' fault (hopefully DS's new private school will choose not to toe the government line on this one, but I don't want to sound too arsey here!).

Tsarchasm - If that is really how you feel then you need to home ed as you seem to be suggesting that all he does ast school is non educational fun.

londonone - That might suit you daftpunk but it would not suit parents who were looking for a more creative approach i.e more trips, clubs etc etc

Londonone - Good grief. No room for negotiation with you is there?

"If you didn't want to have your working life interrupted then you shouldn't have had children."

"if you are not happy with the education your child is receiving you are free to home ed."

Talk about fit in with the school or get lost.

Wow what a thread!

Agree with lots of things already said.

What is this about closing Friday afternoons!!!!!!!!!

From my take there isn't enough "fun things" going on especially in y6 with the Sats.

Think teachers do have to spend a lot of time teaching kids "learning for life" or in other words doing the job of parents who should be teaching their own child social etiquette (?)

mummydragon - NO NO NO! Parents and children are not customers! The schools job is to educate the children the best way it can within the confines of government legislation etc. Pleasing parents is not really the issue.

Well juule they are your children and ultimately that is your choice. Unless the school is actually acting in some way negligently it can't possibly be held responsible for fitting in with every different parents little foible.

londonone - Home ed would never be an option for me - for the simple reason that I AM NOT A QUALIFIED TEACHER!!! If it's that easy to teach kids, why do teachers need degrees, in fact why would we need teachers at all? I send my children to school to learn stuff. That stuff should be more than I am able to do with them at home. That's all I'm saying.

I do agree that, sadly, many parents don't provide the support at home, emotionally or practically, that we would all like to see. But I don't think that primary school teachers should have to make up for that deficit (hhhm, I think we might be agreeing on this point?!)

Mummydragon - if you wander over to the home-ed threads you'll find that most home educators are not qualified teachers but they manage to get their children educated very well.

mummydragon - I haven't suggested you home ed as as far as I am aware you haven't suggested your children learn nothing at school!

Londonone and what about the parents who are unhappy with their child's education who are not in a position to HE?
Like it or lump it?

Expecting to learn basics at school isn't a '
little foible'. Dressing up in mad outfits and watching dvds is.

"Expecting to learn basics at school isn't a 'little foible'"

Exactly.

juule - Yes to a certain degree, unless of course everyone is willing to pay the extraordinarily high tax that would be required to offer a diverse and personalised education system.

Tsarchasm and juule - I suggest you direct you anger at the government then as IME most teacgers would rather teach a simplified and slimmed down curriculum but the DCSF insist upon loading more and more into it.

londonone - pleasing parents is not the main issue, of course, but of course the children are customers. The parents have paid for the education through their taxes, and many parents (myself included) pay a heck of a lot extra in private school fees. But regardless of whether it's a state of private school, of course the children (and parents) are entitled to expect the highest possible level of education. (I don't just mean academically; I mean a rounded, broad education). Teaching primary school children to recycle their bottles instead of teaching them to read/play football/bang a drum does not constitute providing a rounded education; it is indocrination. There's plenty of time for that when the children are older imo!

And let's not forget that not all parents are stupid/lazy/negligent or whatever else the government deems us to be, and that actually we ARE capable of bringing our children up to be thoughful, caring human beings with social consciences and a decent set of values. I am a parent; I am not a teacher. I parent my children; please will the teachers just TEACH them! Don't assume that everyone comes from a disadvantaged background because that just penalises the children who don't.

It's already diverse. I don't think we want diverse. Basic would do just fine.

My ds spent a good deal of time the other day learning how to play an African Drum. Ok very enriching. Meanwhile later at home were thrashing through fractions with him.

londonone..i'm sure the most creative people in the world didn't have dressing up days... it defeats the object anyway because most parents just go out and buy the costumes...i remember "space day"...i went to our local fancy dress/party shop...the women running it said she wished schools would let her know when the dressing up days were due so she could get more stock in.....how creative of her i thought...

MummyDragon - "but I don't want to sound too arsey here!"

Oh go on - you know you want to and I want you to as well.

londonone - my sister does home ed.

She has a degree and is also experienced as a TA. Frankly, I am distraught at the poor education my nephew gets. I have thought seriously about paying for him to go to a private school. He is such a lovely, naturally talented young man but not getting a decent eductation. Just lays in bed until 10.00 a.m and barely does any work. He is 15 and will get no GCSE grades - yet I can see he could easily go to a top University.

Mummy and tsar - neither of your complaints are to do with individual schools and teachers they are about the current system that comes down from on high. I agree with you that the government has got its priorites skewed but don't for one moment think that your children's teachers are necessarily great believers in the government viewpoint!

Mummydragon - sorry to say but there are far far far more shit parents out there than you might realise. I certain didn't realise how many and howe awful until I started teaching.

Oh, and yes, it is very hard for teachers to "just teach" when they are bogged down with all these silly rules and regs, and I am not suggesting that it is their fault at all; of course the system needs a huge overhaul, but sadly I don't imagine the government will have the necessary funds available at the moment ... or the nouse to actually listen to frontline teachers (hark at me, you'd think it was a battleground out there!) who have the knowledge and experience necessary to make a difference to our education system.

I firmly believe that teachers should not be expected to be social workers. Listen to, and help with, individual problems: yes. That's part of the job; you don't become a teacher if you don't care about kids' welfare. Adapt their entire curriculum to cater for one or two individuals' non academic needs: absolutely not.

evenbetadad - There you go. Schools may not be perfect but they sure are a lot better than many parents!

daftpunk - clearly you have a massive bee in your (fancy!) bonnet about dressing up days! Realistically even if they were once a term that is only three days a year! If that really is your biggest worry I would chill out!

I think we're agreeing mummydragon!

We had five dressing up days in the Autumn term. FIVE. F I V E !!!!

You can't tell me that was down to Ofsted, surely?

Of course, not one of them involved anything I had to hand, none were simple "come in your own clothes and donate a quid". There were dressing up days, specific colour days (which, of course, weren't colours my dses had... one day was PINK-themed, you can imagine how well that went down - I don't even like frigging pink) - all in all I spent a stupid amount of money on clothes that term for two dses, even buying cheap from Primark and borrowing where I could.

There's a mum there who has 4 DCs at that school. I really don't know how she coped that term.

londonone you are quite correct about much of this coming from the Govt I think. I will stop ranting now and thank you for the spirited debate.

Like the way you kept cool under fire...you're not a teacher by any chance are you?