to think that age 9 is too young to go the cinema in the evening without an adult ....?

[dicksbird]

Just collected DD from a sleepover. She is 9 but friend she stayed with is 10 and another girl also sleeping over is just 10. They are all in year 5.

I knew there was some mention that a cinema trip may be involved but I wasnt specifically told beforehand.

Now I find out they were dropped outside the cinema at 6.30pm amd picked up at 8.30 from outside. None of them had a mobile phone !!

Mumsney jury what do you think ??? Am i just being silly ???

I suppose 10 maybe 11. He did it once or twice before he left primary school.

So basically very nearly 11. I was also 11 but I was in year 7. The rule had always been you're not allowed to catch the bus on your own until you go to secondary school.

Although I think it perfectly OK to go to the cinema alone at nearly 10 yrs, as long as you live in a reasonable area, I have to admit that mine didn't-but this was only because I wanted to see the films!! I waited until they refused to let me go with them-which comes only too soon!
I don't think it is too important in whether you get independence in a cinema trip-it is after all only sitting in a room with strangers for a couple of hours, so neither here nor there really.

However I do think that people should let go of their own fears and let their DCs live life to the full, taking opportunities when they get them-as long as the risk is reasonable. I am apt to think of my teens as being 'my babies' so I can understand people thinking it of their 9 yr old, but a 9 yr old isn't a baby and it is so sad to stop them doing things because of 'xxx might happen'.
Mine were skiing at 9yrs, kayaking,climbing rock faces, fell walking, sailing, camping with the cubs and probably more. They had accidents - I have been to A&E with all of them-but I think they can look back and think it was fun! It was much better than being wrapped in cotton wool, being thought 'a baby' and having to wait until secondary school to experience anything that could be classed as exciting or that happened away from their mother.

im shocked to find how many people find this resonable for a child to go out on their own at such a young age 8,9,10,11. amazed

That's funny Pink Lace because I am bewildered by the opposite thing - the number of people who wrap their 9, 10, 11, 12 year olds in cotton wool and don't allow them any freedom or responsibility.

cotton wool you call it hmmmm i wont say what im thinking

ok

This is AIBU, PinkLace, you're supposed to say what you're thinking.
But surely you can understand that parenting styles differ?

no because sometimes things come out the wrong way and my mouth gets carried away when i feel very strongly about something.

'No wouldn't put him in ski school either!over protective maybe but everyone has their limits and at 9 i think there is little need to be out and about on their own. '

This is what I shake my head about! I have come across the attitude quite often that a 7, 8 or 9 year old doesn't need to be out and about on their own. I don't think it it is good for a DC of that age to be always in sight of their mother. On their own with other children they learn a lot-they learn how to assess risk for themselves. (Risk with in controlled limits).

Just out of interest, Pinklace, how old are your DC?

I agree wholeheartedly piscesmoon, I think it is very very important for children to have time unsupervised by adults as it is key to developing their independece, imaginary play and a host of other skills.

I know this isn't what you're saying but I really don't think 2 hours in a cinema plays a part in any of that. It is just common sense to say that it would depend upon the child, the area and the cinema.

seeker I had a shoe thrown at me once when I was a child in the cinema. I think a teen boy was trying to get some attention or his mates were playing silly beggars. I did hurt and I nearly sh*t myself! How serious does it have to be?

yes its all very important but do children really need to grow up at a young age? i dont think so. But this argument could go on forever everybody thinks different on how to bring their children up and everyone thinks its the right way where the next person will think their way is right so it will be a neverending thread where everyone is trying to make everybody else see their way and critise.

actually I think 9 is too young to go out ever and I think all nineyearolds should stay in and do english grammar homework so that when they grow up they can write a paragraph in with some punctuation in so that everyone can understand what they are saying and doesn't say I think this and you think that

i know your so clever and your kids must be to your my hero

and i would like to add that i think people in my area let there kids out far to young so they can go and do drugs and drink i feel sorry for these children and they learn off their parents how to be rude their is no hope for these poor children

I'm interested in how many folk are saying, once my DC is at secondary school I'll let them do X,Y, Z. I seem to recall reading somewhere that child/car interactions increase each year when the schools go back after the summer holidays, because of all these DCs who've never crossed a road on their own and are suddenly free to throw themselves randomly in front of moving vehicles.

We are not talking about children roaming round unsupervised doing drugs and drinking. We are talking about 3 year 5 girls being dropped off at the cinema to watch an age appropriate film and being picked up afterwards. I just find it completely incomprehensible that anyone would have a problem with that.

It's not sad, or making them grow up too soon. Letting children wear mini adult clothes and t shirts with provocative slogans on is making them grow up too soon. Not allowing them to experiment with a little controlled freedom and independence.

As I have said to the point of tedium, I have known in my life one child and one adult killed in riding accidents. No one would suggest that I was an irresponsible parent for letting my child ride. After much asking the worst thing that appears to have happened to anyone at the cinema was to be hit by a flying shoe. Not pleasant, I agree, but hardly a traumatizing experience!

how do you control children if they are at the cinema on their own?
how do you control children camping on their own? how can you control anything when you are not there?

MURDER they were two boys on their own aged ten

kiddnapped

rape