to think that encouraging your daughter to learn ballet is cruel

[morningpaper]

Because BASICALLY, ballet is all about body image and is a money-making racket to boot (silly costumes and unecessary shoes).

There just AREN'T curvy ballerinas. You have to have the perfect body - thin, willowy and in perfect proportion. I well remember when my 11 year-old best mate was rejected from the Royal Ballet School because her 'shoulders were too wide'. She cried for weeks. Ballet had been her life.

Basically, they either get sick of it themselves, or they stop because they realise that their BODIES ARE IMPERFECT. Either way, the time could be better used doing some sort of more useful modern dance that you can learn in £1.99 Asda trainers which isn't dependent on having a perfect body.

Please take your daughters to something more useful instead.

My dd (3) goes to football. She is the only girl there which surprises and saddens me.

The first week she was so shy that I had to run round with her for the first 10 or so minutes. She was fine after that though.

No way I would take her to ballet. No way.

My 11-year-old DD1 has been doing ballet since she was four. She is dyspraxic and has real problems with both gross and fine motor control. Ballet has been brilliant for her - I don't think she would be the same person now without it - it has given her grace and confidence in her movements and helped her with her core stability, balance and posture. It has also given her the confidence to perform in public and helped her develop the skills to take a normal part in PE lessons in school - skills a lot of other children take for granted.
She doesn't want to be a ballerina and neither do 90% of her classmates.
You are being silly, MP.

FWIW, I practised ballet until I was 16 and still had the ballet posture for several years afterwards even though I never scaled many dizzy heights in my training so it can beneficial for posture.

It was also good to see a more chunky little girl in Billy Elleiot in the West End a couple of weeks ago too.

Yes classical ballerinas may be one bidy type but to succeed in most other forms of dance where there are numerous body types you generally have to have ballet training.

swimming - revealing outfit
gymnastics - revaling outfit
beach volleyball - revealing outfit
cheerleading - revealing outfit
weighlifting - -realving outfit
cycling - revealing outfit
I could go on

would you stop your child doing any of these activities?
There is presure in all sports to conform. Wjether to have bigger muscles, smaller size shoulders, taller, shorter, fatter, skinnier.
All organised sport puts pressure on you at some stage. If you chose to make it professsional then you have to take the good with the bad.
At least with ballet etc you dont have the psychotic parents screming abuse from the sidelines.
You feel about ballet how I feel about netball.

Dd has been to 3 different dance "schools" so far.

(Why are they called dance schools when it is just one lady in a church hall?)

Anyway. We were looking for somewhere where she could prance around and have fun, and learn a bit what to do with her arms and legs - she likes to dance all the time at home. All of the classes were "dance" rather than ballet. But they all wanted to do shows and exams and costumes, and it gets so expensive and time-consuming. Plus they spend whole lessons, for weeks, practising the same dance over and over so they are perfect for the show or exam. Borrring.

Fortunately she is now 7 and is allowed to join the gymnastics/trampolining class.

Ballet's approach to weight is an ugly tragedy "Lots of very young British girls aspire to be ballerinas. We should be concerned, both with the role models offered within the ballet culture, and with the culture itself."

The posters talking about benefits for dyspraxia are making me waver a bit.

I think it's a bit extreme to call it 'cruel' though.

Some girls (and boys!) must love it or as has been said, we'd have no new dancers.

It's cruel if you make someone do it, but that must be quite rare.

I can see why many girls go through phases of wanting to try it. It is beautiful to watch and appears to them to be the ultimate girly thing to do.

Sometimes that's just a phase, sometimes they stick at it, but realise it damn hard work.

and as for gymnastics - if you want to be good all round gymnast you've got to have muscles, good solid ones

And lets face it really to do any physical activity at a professional level (barring one or two field events that I can think of) having an appropriately shaped/healthy body is kind of essential - you don't tend to see many "large" athletes at the Olympics - all that training tends to take care of that.

There is a girl in dd's class at school who is severly dyspraxic and she does ballet. Shoe loves it and it is great for her.

You may as well discourage children from taking riding lessons in case they want to become jockeys. They have high incidences of weight phobias body awareness and anorexia/buliemia (sp) as well. That's just as competitive a sport as ballet.

Yama - at dd's school (4-9) there is "girls' football club" and "boy's football club". There used to be just "football club" with only one girl attending. Then they started the girls group and it is full. The girls were worried the boys would be too rough, or just too good.

Dd won't go cos you have to go out in the rain and she might get her trainers muddy.

"You don't focus on swimmer's bodies"

well no you can't see them once in the pool - but divers tend to get a lot of focus on their "bodies".

But then tbh when I'm watching things like that (or dancing) I'm not really looking at the body shape of the person who's dancing - I'm looking at what they're actually doing with their body

Now you see I actually think my dd's natural talent lies in drama.

However it is dance she WANTS to do more than anything else. She is so dedicated for a 7 year old.

Hijack thread for proud mummy moment, she is dancing in a professional opera in June!

morning yes that's true - but then lots aspire to be models/actresses/musicians too - and you only need to look around in the media to see they're not much better off aspiring to be any of those either.

What are your thoughts, MP on taking your boy to learn rugby, if you think he is going to be a bit weedy?

There just AREN'T weedy rugby players. You have to have the perfect body - muscular, strong etc. And if you don't have strong legs the shorts show off your lack of muscles for all to see.

And if you're not strong enough - and even if you are - you'll get the living shit kicked out of you.

Would it be cruel to take your son to ride horses if your husband is 6'5" and you think your DS will take after him, in case he wants to be a jockey?

Many sports/activities have specific physical types required in order to be successful at a professional level.

It doesn't mean that the activity itself cannot be enjoyed.

Catherder - good to hear the girls football team is full. The one dd goes to is run by our local football team and is mixed until age 7.

Some of the boys are a bit rough but if she's knocked over she just picks herself up and carries on.

I like the idea of a team sport.

I post on a dance teachers forum. I'm not a dance teacher but I work for a performing arts school so some of what they discuss is of interest.

There are always posts from ballet teachers concerned about their students body image and asking advice on ensuring they develop a healthy attitude.

As I said before my dd is beginning to think that carbs are bad. That has come from school (limit potatoes, chips etc). Also that sugar free is better for you and low fat yoghurt rather than full fat. Again all from PHSE lessons at school.

(Cheerleading is pretty dreadful too btw. I mean REALLY)

I did five yrs of ballet classes when aI was a child, and tbh I don't remember anyone being "concerned" or vaguely interested in our body shapes.

I agree with you in that a good number of professional ballerinas have eating disorders and excruciating backaches and pain in their feet etc. Not a career I'd want for my dd.

Ballet classes seem to be all the rage here as well, but I'm not keen on dd to start.

MP, are you bored and trying to get some good quotes for your round-up tomorrow??

all my girls do ballet, and all other forms of dance too. my eldest is hopin to go into dance as a career, and I truly think she could, but not as a ballerina at the london school of ballet, but as a dancer in general.

ballet is the basis of most forms of dancing, and did you know, professional footballers do ballet as a form of training as it helps them understand their bodies better and perform better on the pitch.

ballet is not just about body image, it is about grace and poise and balance!

oh, and as for the outfits.........most girls train wearing leotards, tights, leg warmers and a ballet skirt, no so no emphasis on the thighs beyond watching the leg lines as they have to turn out thier legs from their hips, not their knees.

I'd love my son to take up ballet as he is a gorgeous little dancer but at the moment he is only interested in trains.

I'd prefer dd to be doing ballet than sitting playing computer games every night.

I'd love my son to take up ballet as he is a gorgeous little dancer but at the moment he is only interested in trains.

I'd prefer dd to be doing ballet than sitting playing computer games every night.

I knew someone when I was at Uni who was at the RSB. She told me some shocking stories. Not a life I'd want for my daughter, but if she wanted it I'd fully support her.