...to be annoyed that people are so negative about an August baby?

[KathrynAustin]

DS2 was born end of August 2007.

After my fisrt scan we were thrilled and told everyone our due date of 27.08.07. I was pretty shocked when lots of people responded with "Oh no he/she will be the youngest in the year", "...they'll have problems at school etc etc".

Obviously none of this had occured to me and it was b**y annoying that everyone focused on it.

I have a colleague who planned coming off the pill so that her babies were born in September/October, so that they would be "...the cleverest in the class...". Arghhh.

I know that being the youngest DS2 will be up to a year behind some peers, but why don't we wait and see rather than label him now?

We go to weekly playgroups and the converstaion often turns to children's ages & birthdays. I've noticed that when asked I now say "Unfortunately he was born end of August..." before the mother can comment about our "bad timing".

My personal concerns are that at 4 years 1 month my eldest was still having the occasional accident, and the Mon-Fri in full-time school seem really long for a young child.

Our local primary has recently stopped staggered entry into Reception, so it is September for all.

Anyway, has anyone else encountered this? On a selfish note, 1 year less nursery fees is an attractive proposition!

Kathryn

sake of it! not ?

tbh - if dds1 and ds3 &had* been planned , I would have planned July and August and avoided sept/oct

I have an August boy, and wibble about how he will do at school which is utterly ridiculous as he is only 8 months old!

I think though you (we) are well aware of it due to everyones helpful (wanky) comments. So are in a position to support, help, and advocate for our children in school.

It's interesting to note that from Lilymaids slightly depressing report that start date of school makes no difference - so they should go in Sept.

My DH always waves his hand and reminds me that he is a late June baby and the cleverest person we know by far from med school (double first, total genius) was an August boy.

I think Scotland has the right idea in that children go to school in the calender year they are five, not the academic year.....so some will have been five since January, some not five till December, but they are all there or thereabouts. It seems to make for a more balanced year group.

Oooh yes, Shambolic! I made sure I didn't marry a man with the surname beginning with 'A' because the 'A's are the ones that have to go and do things first!! Jabs/tests etc!!!

oh, and YANBU. There is more to being a child than how well you perform at school and once an adult we're all pretty much equal really. To plan your children around them doing better than their peers at school is a bit warped and competitive mum-ish if you ask me.

Ah but apparently they also get picked first for "good things" and noticed more and end up doing better... Don't know how true that is!

I married a man with an "S" name and have one DD born July and another baby due July...

We're doomed I tell you, doomed...

Next time someone says this, as they are effectively saying "oh what a cute baby, shame that it's really thick, and that it's all your fault you terrible terrible mummy" I think it is fair enough to respond "well at least s/he's not an ugly little bugger" while eyeing the other persons offspring.

Ours were the ones that had to get jabbed first! We are a 'J' name, so I am happy!!

OP FWIW, I am due baby no 4 Sept 16th, everybody keeps saying how lucky I am! I am dying to go 17 days early!!

It is a bit sad really. These are all little individuals we're talking about.

The idea that you would deliberately stop trying in certain months to avoid a july/august baby just makes me feel really sad.

As if a baby due in September which came early say, would have ruined mummy and daddy's plans and its own life before it even got going

DD is an August child. She is in the top groups for all subjects. She is more mature than many of her classmates - gets bored and frustrated with the fluffy wuffy pink and shiny girls, all of whom are months and months older than her.

The Scotland system sounds sensible. In New Zealand they start on the day they are 5, and it is a big rite of passage thing so a cause for celebration and excitement. That too, is sensible.

DS2 is the 30th August and the youngest in his class, he is way ahead of the curve and doing well, please don't let stupid people worry you.

Hi Gorionine, The problem is that even if the child started school a year later, they would still be put in a class with the children who started the previous year. Therefore, they would have missed out up to a years worth of 'education'. This is a problem with a system that is based around birthdates, rather than readiness, when deciding at what time children should start school. I seriously considered holding my DS" back until he was five and therefore legally required to start school, until I discovered he would still be in the same class as all his friends who had started in the previous September, so he would have missed a lot of the formal stuff. I personally don't like all the formal stuff they do at such a young age, but given that is is what happens, I did not want to put him at a disadvantage by making him miss
out.

The other problem with keeping a child home until legally required to send them, is that schools are not legally required to hold a place for you, so if you want a school that is oversubscribed, you could find you are out of luck because places will have been allocated to children who were ready to use the place in September. You could then end up with a school that is not so good, not so local or whatever.

Despite working in education, I do think some of its systems are very 'unfriendly' to say the least!

My Ds was born on August 10th. He had the best and widest vocabulary at just over a year old, with proper conversations and fantastic use of long and descriptive words. He potty trained at 2 years old in 4 days and was using the toilet within two weeks.
He is second youngest in his school year and I did feel it was a bit of a disadvantage. In September, he starts secondary school. He is going to be attending a Grammar school.

Stop worrying about your Ds2. Encourage him and stop making an issue of his August birthday or he may start to think of it as a problem ~ and it really isn't.

I have 2 August babies and tbh have never given it a second thought. Ok my eldest hasn't started school yet but he is bright for his age and talks like a 3 plus yr old at 2 so I think he'll be fine. As others say, it's nice to have a summer birthday, outdoor parties etc. My birthday is in January, the weather is always miserable and no one ever wants to do anything as it's right after Xmas! Can't say that I was at any advantage being slightly older at school.

People are weird, like the lot who go on when you have 2 or more of the same and seem to believe you are 'missing' something without the opposite gender

I absolutely see the benefit in having an August birthday - we can have park parties that won't trash my house!

Lilymaid - a depressing report! The one that I had read said that the August babies catch up with their peers within a few of years.

I am a staunch believer that all children are different and won't let negative comments about August babies get to me! I probably do live in an area which is very middle class and has more than its fair share of "pushy parents" (who drive me nuts) - so perhaps they are more likely to make these comments.

An interesting point is that a lot of reoprts/comments about being the youngest in the year mention the younger child being physically smaller and therefore less able - a reason why they don't do so well in Football as the Guardian report suggested perhaps? If you are smaller maybe you won't get picked for the team??

My DS2 is a big boy, looks tall for his age so maybe this will be a plus point for him, and make up for any other shortfalls!

Hooray for all our August babies I say!

Ah! now see, I think that is the only disadvantage Alishanty, because the school hols are on and if you invite kids before the break, they either forget or are away, or something. My Ds never gets a party because of this sadly.

My first was born in Nov, my much waited/tried for was born in late Aug (due date).

I will not be having another, but if I did I would try to avoid an summer birth.

We are going to an Ed Tribunal to get out LEA to allow us to keep DS back a year, he has developmental delays and is developmentally in line with children a year younger.

Wow sayitasitis, I am ed that this is how it hapens. So if you start your child at 5 he could "skip" reception? Scary indeed, knowing that I would not want to take the risk!

anecdotally my cousin (august 26th) got a first class degree and is now doing a phd

DS1 is august and ds2 is boxing day - i know who gets to have the best birthday.

Also the great thing about summer born boys - is that when mothers are playing the competitive game you can always bring out the august birthday card . Which in many ways brings a lot less pressure on the child as there's no immediate expectation for them to be the oldest/best/cleverest in their year.

DD born August 02. Stayed at part time private nursery through until Easter & this was the best thing we could have done! She missed out on nothing at school because everything except reading was covered at nursery & we did the reading with her in the evenings.
In year 1 teacher would keep all the youngest kids together in a group.
Year 2 and she is top group for everything and well beyond where she should be for her year group and age. However, we have been warned that she will be held back and not labelled g&t for a few years (unlike her best 'eldest in the year' friend) because it will take her a while to be best in yeargroup instead of 'just for her age'!
Be warned, achievement is just not recognised unless you are the eldest

My DH has an August birthday and was absolutely categoric that we would not have a July or August baby. He was so adamant about it that he didn't even want a baby due in early October, as he had been, but was born early. He felt it really affected him at school. He's short anyway and didn't like always being the smallest.

He didn't do well in his A-levels at 17 but got 4 As a year later at 18. I think this is mainly because he was at a shite school which didn't teach him the whole syllabus. He accepts that's part of the problem.

He wasn't - isn't - interested in our children "being the cleverest" in the year which I think it is a odd thing to say, but in them coping and enjoying school overall. Research does show, though, that summer born boys do perform worse at school. Obviously there are other factors at play but the link is clear.

Anyway, he was adamant about the whole thing he was threatening to remove baby making facilities for the appropriate four months. Fortunately for me I conceived quite quickly and had a May baby .

From my own personal experience I can see how much harder Reception is for nearly every July/August boy I know, and their mums feel the same way. They would have loved to keep them at home for a bit longer before sending them to school. Now if we started school a few years later I think they would all be less concerned.