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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To ask DH to bring a couple of bits of shopping home?

1004 replies

starsnstripes · 20/03/2009 15:42

Emailed DH to ask if he would bring some milk and bread home on the way back from work as thought I had some in the freezer.

He replied "Yes ok"

Then he sent a seperate e mail titled "Why"

It read
"why are running out of basic items?"

Know that sounds pretty tame but he has been really agrumentive recently and questioning everything I have'nt done or criticising what I have done.

It's just another case of him being verbally abusive and controlling.

OP posts:
dittany · 05/04/2009 16:38

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starsnstripes · 05/04/2009 16:38

I started to make a list but then got worried he would find it.
I think I will sit here and go through the lists that people have posted for me,will keep my mind busy.

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GettingaGrip · 05/04/2009 16:38

I went out this morning to watch my daughter competing....she is 18 and has competed in her particular sport since she was about 5.

Her useless father has been to watch her just twice.

I came back from watching her, and parked my very old and cronky) car outside my (rented and modest) house....and my heart lifted in my breast as I walked up my path. This is MY HOUSE, I am free and happy here.

For twenty years when I drove up to my (huge) matrimonial home (which incidentally was owned by my husband's parents) I felt sick.

THis could be you!!!!!

I have had an afternoon of pottering around...happy and stress free. My heart is light.

THis could be you!!!!!

This is the time stars....

xxxxxxxx

Longtalljosie · 05/04/2009 16:38

One step at a time.

Do you want to go right now? The "where" is secondary.

Ivegotthetshirttoo · 05/04/2009 16:41

I have been reading this thread with interest, having escaped an abusive relationship four and a half years ago. I wish that I had had the support you are getting here at the time. I really needed someone to say to me at the time "what he is doing is not acceptable. It amounts to domestic violence". I know the other people commenting here have said this many times. Listen to them. They are saying it for a reason and really mean it.

It seems to me that you are worried about leaving because of the effect that it will have on your children. It may be that because he is not directly aggressive to them and will play and attempt to be a good father to them that you should put up with his treatment to you for their sakes. You are questioning whether you would be a bad mother to remove them from him.

I would like to say that it is not good parenting on your part to stay with your husband.

It is unfortunate that children who grow up witnessing domestic abuse are more likely to become abusers or victims of abuse themselves. My abusive ex witnessed his mother suffering domestic abuse and suffered some himself. He used this as an 'excuse' to be abusive to me. He would say that it was not his fault that he drank too much, hit me, verbally abused me and was controlling because he had 'issues' from his childhood that had had a lasting effect on his behaviour and personality.

It took me a long time to realise that it was his choice to drink too much and his choice not to go to counselling, because I had sympathy for the difficult childhood he had been through. Eventually, I realised that his use of this 'excuse' was just classic manipulative behaviour of the sort that he had learnt from his father.

You have already witnessed your DS saying things to you that are not acceptable: for instance his comment that if you had tidied the dining room earlier there would not have been a problem. He seems to be at a cross roads at the moment between his sensitive caring side, and adopting his father's attitude.

Part of the reason that I took so long to leave my ex was that I had learnt from my parent's relationship. My mother has been very unhappy for some time in a relationship that fortunately is not abusive or violent, but does not meet her emotional needs. I learnt from her that one has to stick at a relationship no matter how slight the chances of making it a happy one. Now I think that this lesson is perhaps one of the things not to adopt from my upbringing. The point is that children do learn from the relationships around them as they are growing up.

My point is that even if you cannot find the courage to leave for your own sake, do it for the sake of your children.

Next time that your husband is abusive to you, try picturing your DS saying the same words to his partner in 20 years time. Or picture your DD hearing them instead.

I realise that this post may have left you feeling rather wretched, and I am sorry for that. It does seem that otherwise you are a brilliant mum. You have kept yourself strong enough to give them a stable as possible life and have not descended into a hole of misery where you are incapable of looking after their needs.

You have every opportunity to signal to your children that this is not acceptable in a relationship by making the step to leave your husband. There is plenty of time for you in the future, once you have allowed yourself sufficient breathing space to re-establish your own sense of identity and worth, to enter into other relationships which can show to your children a much more health way of behaving.

I wish you all the best of luck for a future that you and your children deserve, and add my voice to the chorus telling you to get out.

xxx

dittany · 05/04/2009 16:41

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PMSLBrokeMN · 05/04/2009 16:41

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starsnstripes · 05/04/2009 16:43

dittany-am just going to put on some loud music,that usually helps.
I have buried everything but my memory is still pretty clear to recall things if I need to.
Starting this thread and reading through all the old threads has helped a lot.
Mumsnet and thos thread is my saviour at the moment.
Don't want to ring my sister and ruin her sunday,it's not fair on her.

I don't really have anywhere to go and I don't drive,I wish I did,the car is sitting outside.

OP posts:
MuppetsMuggle · 05/04/2009 16:45

Stars i don't think your sister would mind tbh like dittany says stay there one or two days and get yourself to the refuge

dittany · 05/04/2009 16:45

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dittany · 05/04/2009 16:47

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chickenmama · 05/04/2009 16:49

I have a large double room spare for the next couple of weeks. I don't know how you'd feel about going to someone you don't know, but I've been thinking of offering for a while now. How does that sound?

Longtalljosie · 05/04/2009 16:50

Do you want to leave, love?

You've had so much support, heard so many stories on here, but the time's come to put other people's voices to one side and listen to what your heart is telling you. Because although I think you know you're in an abusive relationship, you won't leave unless you actually want to. Do you?

dittany · 05/04/2009 16:51

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GypsyMoth · 05/04/2009 16:52

I can understand about not wanting to involve your sister in this stars. I was the same, didn't want any family involved, it was my mess so to speak, and up to me to drag myself out of it! So I can see how you're thinking. And you do feel good once you're out and doing things for yourself. All the small things become important. You feel a sense of pride by doing it yourself.

But take the help that womens aid can offer . And take it from there. You said earlier that you're taking the 2 weeks to sort things........so what happens after the 2 weeks?

starsnstripes · 05/04/2009 16:53

Sorry everyone if I don't reply individually am getting myself all anxious the longer he is out.
thanks for all your repies.
the stories of a happy life waiting for me are keeping me going.

I am not too sure if he knows I am planning on leaving,sometimes I do then I think no he would say something after he had had a drink.
I truly believe he just think this change in me is because he feels I am unstable at the moment and mentally ill or going through the menopause as he has pointed ot before when he said "get some treatment"

OP posts:
MuppetsMuggle · 05/04/2009 16:55

Stars instead of getting anxious about when he is going to come in - pack a suitcase and go. deal with the rest later.

dittany · 05/04/2009 16:58

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GettingaGrip · 05/04/2009 17:09

Stars...

I bet you a million pounds (!) that you will NOT ruin your sister's Sunday.

I bet you make her Sunday.

If I was nearer (Yorkshire)i would come and get you and put you up in my bedroom.

That happy life can start NOW.....

xxxxx

amidaiwish · 05/04/2009 17:13

stars, just take a break for a while. a couple of days at your sisters, then a couple of weeks at the refuge. see how you feel, see how you all get on.
that's all you need to do for now.
take the essential paperwork, a few clothes if you really want to, you don't need anything else.

HonkingAntelope · 05/04/2009 17:16

Stars, are the children still playing outside? If so, could you watch them through the window whilst you call Womens Aid.

It might help to have them to speak to, and they could certainly advise you as to how to go about leaving today if you so wish. If not, it might just help focus your mind on the future and keep you positive.

I hope that you're ok.

starsnstripes · 05/04/2009 17:18

Thanks everyone for your support and kind offers -chickenmama-that is so kind of you am really touched but would'nt want to impose on you and feel I have to do this myself,hope you understand.

I do want to leave...

Hopefully after 2 weeks I will be prepared mentally and physically.

I don't want to be here when he gets back but at the moment feel I can't leave.

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Stayingsunnygirl · 05/04/2009 17:19

Sars - sit down, fix a positive image in your head (a beach, a beautiful sunset, your children laughing in the sun) and then simply focus on that image, breathing in strength and positivity with each breath, and breathing out anxiety and stress. Let the positive wipe away the anxiety.

{{hugs}}

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 05/04/2009 17:24

Stars, I don't think he thinks you're mentally unstable or going through the menopause or anything else he says. He says that to try and undermine you and to try to make you think you're the one with a problem.

Deep down he knows he is the one with a problem and he is trying to do everything he can to stop you noticing that.

Thinking of you and hope you get to leave soon. I think the anticipation and thought of leaving could well be worse than actually doing it. Once you have taken te plunge things will fall into place.

dittany · 05/04/2009 17:25

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