to expect to use a disabled toilet when I'm out with the pram?

[CT123]

I can't use the ladies when I have my baby with me in the pram. The only thing I can do is wheel him into the disabled toilet with me. But the disabled toilets have special locks on them, which presumably disabled people have special keys for. I appreciate that they want to stop able-bodied people hogging disabled toilets but what else can I do?

Disabled parking is different, because once you take that space you are there possibly for hours.

Meanwhile, the time I spend in a disabled toilet is minutes, obviously with no disabled person waiting as I walk in. So the chances of a disabled person showing in as I am in there and waiting for any significant length of time are very slim indeed.

Yes, I used disabled toilets when out and about with a pram, and fully intend to pick up the practice when #2 comes along. You must be crazy to think I would leave a baby outside. And for what - so if a disabled person shows up, he doesn't wait for two minutes?

I certrainly believe that buying a radar ket if not disabled is odd; it takes away from caught short and makes it intentional.

Could I also point out that disabled does not necessarily mean wheelchair user? the person who said they would let a wheelchair user go in if there was one- and not my ASD boys?

The biggest problem this causes other than access is the trust: this is why diosabled people yell at me when I take my boys in.

And for those who remember it-

THIS is why a group of kids thought it Ok to crack ASD DS1's head against a cistern for punishment for using a disabled loo when apaprently he clearly is not disabled. It's a breach of trust that not only affects all disabled people but leaves those of us dealing with non visible disability in a stupid palce whewre neither the visibly disabled nor NT people think we should get access to toilets based not on logic here but the OK looking child they see coming out of the loo in ASda.

Don't do it people, if you can in any way avoid it.

CoteDAzur, did you even read the post a few posts down from yours?

spice we dont mke a fuss because we are too busy fighting for everythin else; its exhausting

DS1 if not on form( ie overloading) doesn't tell us- opr register I think- he needs a loo until 2 minutes bfore an accident- as a nine year old that would be so mortifying so yes, waiting can be an issue.

i have just read the whole thread and what strikes me is that we are fighting over something because we haven't got enough.

Disabled parking spaces are usually accompanied by P&T spaces also. Their use by mothers/fathers with small children is therefore not usually required. Also being nearer to the shop is a convenience with a small child but not a necessity.
Arguably being able to see/supervise your small children at all times is.

Therefore, the use of disabled parking is selfish - the use of a disabled toilet where other facilities are lacking is not.

The real issue is with the stores who fail to provide adequate parent toilets, thus ensuring that people with prams feel they have no option but to (usually reluctantly, and guiltily) use the disabled ones.

Can we all stop beating each other up now please? Nobody wants to use the disabled loos especially if it means someone genuinely in need might have an accident or be inconvenienced.

But there's often no suitable alternative - people look at you very funny if you try and leave the doors open in a normal cubicle. It's not always possible to even take a buggy into the main room let alone the tiny little toilet.

I did, but what if I didn't, is that a crime, too?

absolutely peachy....if only they knew huh?

Such a selfish attitude cote, why don't you plan your trip and use loos for your purpose and don't steal the closest one to you??

The disabled are lucky to get one poxy loo in a whole shopping area and you still want to use it?? Walk a bit extra BECAUSE YOU CAN!

I'm classified as disabled as am profoundly deaf. While I am physically able to use normal loos - and I do if DS isn't with me or if he is walking and can fit in with me, I use disabled loos when have the buggy as there is no way I could hear him if he was outside the cubicle.

Thing is, while I appreciate that disabled people need the toilet asap and to find the the toilet occupied by non disabled people is a total annoyance, what happens if the toilet is occupied by another disabled user who may take even longer than a mum nipping in with the buggy for a quick tinkle?

It's down to this sense of entitlement so many of have us have, isn't it?

Just think of somebody else, possibly worse off than you, put yourself in their shoes, and see how it would feel, read Embarrassed's post Cote....

Oh dear, how absolutely AWFUL for people having to TAKE THEIR BABY/TODDLER OUT OF THE PRAM if they want to use the normal ladies loo.

HOW INCONVENIENT FOR YOU.

Jeez, stop being so selfish people.

So bloody what if you have to wake up your precious sleeping newborn.

Selfish, selfish, selfish.

Puss- that's just hard luck if that happens (only once ever to us).

Sorry for the small rant there.

Was just a bit upset.

Cote see you had read it sorry misread your post.

JimmyChoos I had thought that too, but if you go down that line, you would eventually get to the point (we're so many of us on thread seem to be) that it's OK for anybody to use disabled toilets as they'll have to wait anyway....

But can't you lift baby out of pram and just carry then into a loo with you, leavinghte pram outside? Can't imagine anyone would run off with an empty pushchair.

how does one have a wee whilst holding on to a baby? and pull up everything?

usually the baby change is in disabled toilets (in my experience)

i would not be happy leaving a 4 yr old and a 1 yr old and a baby in pushchair in a busy toilet

also if people are queing up, how does one manouver around?

Where is the baby supposed to go when you are in the cubicle?

You can't imagine that someone would steal an empty pram? Where do you live i want to live there!

I agree with flight. There aren't enough suitable toilets to go round and I would be absolutely bloody mortified if some disabled person wet themselves because I was trying to change a resistant toddler's nappy. But that wouldn't be my fault would it?

Having toddlers plus baby does complicate things a lot- I'd be seriously disapoointed with any Mum who left a toddler unattended. But genrally most of us get enough warning to go elsewhere or wait: if not then I suppose I (and I dont speak in any way for SN generally) would understand.

It is possible to use a loo with a baby held I do it daily (baby screams if I put him down- no not precious PFB LOL (Precious fourth baby!) but a dh asleep becuase he works nights and who would wake.

You hold the baby, and wriggle a bit, or if a toddler, get them to stand. And I live in inner city London with a posh pram, with a brake that no one can figure out, which is why no one would run off with it!

Embarrassed10, that is my point. If shops provided enoug mother/baby facilities (or even just one, which would mean a wait, which isn't a problem for most mums) then we wouldn't need to use the disabled toilet.

It's not about convenience. Have you tried having a wee and sorting out sanitary equipment and so on with a crying newborn on your lap/in your arms, before? It's really really difficult, sometimes impossible.

I rarely even use a public toilet but if I really could not wait and had to use one, I would probably use the disabled one if there was nowhere else to go with a pram - I would always try and leave the pram with a stranger first but sometimes you can't.

Being angry with mums with no facilities of their own isn't the answer.

It is one thing getting caught short and using the open disabled toilet with your pram.

Buying a key which is intended for disabled people is something else entirely and clearly shows intent. Those toilets are locked for a reason, and as a non disabled person you do not have the right to use them, pram or no pram.

You should be required to provide proof of disability before being entitled to buy a key, and falsely obtaining a key should be an offence.

You don't necessarily need to take baby out of pram, and you don't necessarily need to leave the buggy unattended either.

Think laterally guys! This is not brain surgery!

You sit the baby on your lap while you go, then you hold said baby against your body with one arm while you hoist up your jeans or whatever it is you are wearing.

When they are older they can stand against the toilet wall for support (I can hear the groans of germs already...) or they can stand independently.

It really is not difficult.

As a parent, I'd rather use a disabled toilet than leave my DS outside the toilet cubicle and then come out and find him gone. Yes, I know its rare blah blah but there is no way in hell I'm taking that chance and oh boy, imagine the slating any mother would get if they did this, on here??!

Furthermore, you cannot wee with a newborn or toddler in your arms - its so hard and if you put them on the floor, they start playing with the tampax bin etc - which is so gross!

We need family friendly toilets as well as disabled loos - IKEA provide them and its lovely to be able to just go in and not feel guilty about having to use a disabled loo

I've no issue with someone changing a baby/toddler when it's a combined toiled for disabled and baby change.

It's just my bad luck in those situations.

But I do get annoyed when it's NOT a baby change loo and an adult wants to use the loo for themselves.

Someone loads of people manage to not use disabled loos ever no matter if they have a huge pram with them. They pee fast/keep door ajar/whatever.

Oh and have you never had to use the loo in your own house with a baby on your knee? Or it it just mine lot that wouldn't let me put them down even for a second. It takes a lot of wriggling about but you CAN do it.