or is it too early to be annoyed by lack of thank you's for Christmas gifts?

[deaconblue]

Dh and I sent 15 gifts to a variety of children this year (mostly kids of friends who also sent gifts to our dc's). Have only received 4 thank you's. Our dc's thank you's were posted by the end of 2008. I don't even expect thank you cards but a text, phone call or email would be nice.
or do you reckon end of Jan is time after which lack of thank you's becomes rudeness?

'In curmudgeonly style, this thread has reminded me that dh's niece, who is over 18 and lives independently, has never once acknowledged birthday/Christmas cheques which makes me disinclined to bother from now on.'

Yes, it's the, 'this gift is my due' feeling you get when there is no acknowledgement of the gift having even been received.

My DTs are only eight months old and got quite a few Christmas gifts... I have been thinking I must send thank you notes but then wondered do I have to as they are not old enough to send them themselves?

Would you expect a thank you for a gift for an eight month old?

No I would assume that with an 8 month old baby, you would have better things to do than write cards

A phone call / text/ e-mail would be sufficient

I have TWO eight month old babies so yes I do have better things to do! Will try to phone/text/FB etc instead. I am usually really good with this sort of thing but Christmas was such a blur I can hardly remember who gave them pressies.

'Would you expect a thank you for a gift for an eight month old?'

Just an acknowledgement that the gifts have been received and thank you very much - how you choose to convey that message is your choice.

spot the tautology!

christmas is about the giving of gifts. I dont expect thankyous for pressies. But I do acknowledge anything through the post so the sender knows I ve received it.

we always send thankyou card/letters to acknowledge presents that have been sent rather than given in person. my family live along way away to it means they know the boys have had & likes their pressies.

IMO thankyou's go along way

They do, don't they fled? Takes very little time, costs nothing (or next to nothing), but speaks enormous volumes about your respect and gratitude to people who made an effort to please you and make you happy.

There was a great suggestion in the Times at the weekend, send an unsigned cheque, that will quickly provoke a thank you note!

I stopped sending gifts to nephews and nieces who never sent a thank you, call me a meanie, but I never knew whether they'd got the gift or not. I have never heard them say they haven't received anything or missed the presents.

I asked one 11 year old what did she buy with the £20 I gave her and she said sweets and can't remember what else! This was only 10 days after her birthday, yet she was nagging her mother for another DS game, she could have used her own money!

For those that don't bother to say thank you, in whatever form, do you say thank you if someone passes you something or makes you a cup of tea? Surely being given a present that someone has bothered to choose and spend their money on for you is worth saying something?

Hmmm, Thank you cards aren't something we do in Belgium and so I never remember to do it. We generally just ring and say thank you, for me that's just as good.

My poor dc obviously have an old fashioned dragon for a mother. Apart from when presents are received and opened in the presence of the giver (like pp) they each write letters. ds - 6- writes them himself, ds - 4 - writes who it is to, and the love froms, and dictates the middle bit for me to write, and I do dd - 1 - for her. They're not long, or fancy, just an acknowledgment that someone has thought of them and chosen something specifically for them.

As for not remembering who gave what, we write a list as we go along. Frankly I would be rather disgusted if my children thought Christmas was just a frenzy of present opening without giving any thought to the giver.

We send many presents. My sil has not acknowledged the arrival of her dc's presents. We don't know if they arrived.

Another friend says he just chucks cheques from his godmother in the bin as they're not even worth the bother of going to the bank to pay in. I hope she realises they are not cashed and stops sending them.

Having ranted, I have no objection to phone calls, emails etc as thanks, but something is polite. So, yes, old fashioned, and proud of it!

My ds is only 2.5 months and I always send a thank you to friends/family for their gifts at Christmas/Birthdays and also when he was born....I'm old fashioned I suppose. I don't expect them back and know who will and who won't but I do regardless.

BUT....I have this irritating thing with my in-laws where many of their old friends who neither DH nor I ever see buy our DS a xmas present. I have discussed the "issue" with MIL and have suggested that her friends might like to spend their pennies on their own family or save it or something and perhaps we could dissuade them from buying him stuff. They (my in-laws) also then expect us to send thank you's for the said presents (which I don't want bought in the first place) - I've done the thank you's for "my" family and some close friends and for those people I've tried to resolve with MIL - I've left to DH - secretly I'm hoping that DH will "forget" and they might not buy for him again....