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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I don't think I am but here goes

312 replies

TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 22:29

DS1 has opportunity to go on a school journey. I was in 2 minds about letting him go mainly because there is going to be 6 chalets each with 5 children in and 1 chalet with 4 members of staff in.

Now it comes out that the price which is £350 does not apply to the 3 sets of twins in the class they have to pay £350 for the 2 rather than £700.

DS1 really wants to go so i have said to him IF the twins are both going and only paying for one then I will be telling the school that I will pay half the price as what is good for 1 (or in this case 6 with it being 3 sets of twins) is good for all.

Am I being unreasonable to expect the price to be the same for all???

OP posts:
Celia2 · 07/01/2009 23:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:13

Thumb yes that would make more sense. But this one woman doesn't even pay for a school day out when it costs as little as £5 for each child she only pays for one. Now where it is an educational trip they cannot leave a child behind. on the other hand as this is a school journey they can if the children don't pay. So technically one of the twins should be left behind as only one twin has been paid for.

OP posts:
Celia2 · 07/01/2009 23:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:16

MillyR, I have already said to him if he doesn't go he can have the week off school and we will go away. the school say the children who don't go will be expected to be in school during this week.

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wohmum · 07/01/2009 23:17

I agree with candlewax - the second twin is pobably paid out of a seperate budget rathern being funded by everyone else paying more.

seems a fair system to me - yabu

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:18

Celia, how terrible that the parents of 1 child couldn't or wouldn't pay. This is not on when there are people who like you have triplets who pay for them all. I am simply saying the price should be made affordable for all and not just for some.

£350 for 2 children is fair but £350 for one child is not.

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mazzystartled · 07/01/2009 23:19

no, because the school have got a budget for it

you are not paying for them

if you can't afford it, should speak to someone who will hopefully be able to use their discretion to your benefit as well as the twins'. honestly if you go in saying what you said in your op you will get nowhere and they will jsut think youa re arsey and not want to help

thumbwitch · 07/01/2009 23:19

i agree that the teachers should not have to pay for it - I'm quite sure a lot of them would infinitely prefer not to go as it is pretty much round the clock work for them (I have 2 friends who are teachers) and to be asked to pay to go to work longer hours than normal would be a bit rich!!

CoffeeAndCarrotCake · 07/01/2009 23:19

To be honest, I don't think you're being unreasonable to feel miffed if it's all the other kids' parents who are subsidising the twins. I'd have thought though that the school would have a fund to cover this sort of thing, so it won't actually affect you personally. I'd probably feel a little bit jealous in the same way that I would if I heard that someone else had a scholarship so didn't have to pay school fees, but I wouldn't actually say anything about it.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:19

Woh, ok so your dc has a school trip coming up and the mother of one of the sets of twins you know pays half of what you are paying...you would be happy with that?

OP posts:
mazzystartled · 07/01/2009 23:21

no pays the same in total
so long as i wasn't paying more to make it possible i honestly wouldn't mind
try to think of it as cost per family

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:22

Coffee i am not jealous tbh we could afford it if we waited a while for our family holiday which would not be a problem. But i just don't see why 1 family pay £350 per family where there are 2 children and another pays the same for 1 child.

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MillyR · 07/01/2009 23:22

Ladyevenstar

I have been in this position but without the twin aspect; the trip was too expensive and the school insisted that children who did not go had to attend school.

We had an extra holiday that year (but during a half term) and did all the things ds wanted to do, for the price of the trip. He had a far better time than he would have done on the trip. It was so expensive for so little that most people pulled out in the end anyway.

I wouldn't send him unless he is absolutely desperate to go, as it is a waste of money.

KingHerodNametaken · 07/01/2009 23:22

You remind me of the Nazi Commandant in Sophie's Choice.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:22

Mazzy the letter states

The cost of the trip is £350 per CHIILD

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Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:23

Milly, if he doesn't go he will be off of school we will go away or go out and do the things he wants to do.

OP posts:
Celia2 · 07/01/2009 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:24

LMAO King have been called worse

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KingHerodNametaken · 07/01/2009 23:26

I bet, what does LMAO mean,

MillyR · 07/01/2009 23:28

The per family thing is a bit of a red herring. If someone has 5 kids and someone else has 3 kids (2 of whom happen to be twins), then the cost of school trips for the 5 kid family is going to be greater over all.

What I suspect to be the case is that schools are given an extra budget for twins and they have decided to use the budget for this school trip, which then has no impact on the other children.

thumbwitch · 07/01/2009 23:28

LMAO = laughed my arse off

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:29

Celia, we don't have stacks of money either, dp has just returned to work after being redundant since July. Things have been tight but as you say thats life. We have paid for all school trips perviously and not had a problem with the sets paying half however this time i do.

The letter states the price as per child not per family and i think the school should have thought about the sets in the class when looking at arranging a school journey. When i spoke to the school about the price i was told i would be able to pay it in 4 installments.....well i didn't have the finances to do so, so to find out that others are paying £175 per child has riled me a bit to say the least.

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naturalbornmum · 07/01/2009 23:29

YANBU. 2 kids - 2 payments.

cascade · 07/01/2009 23:29

I think what you will find on most trips, that holiday/travel companies who deal with school party bookings that they allocate a certain number of teacher places free depending on how many children are going.
I have organised many school trips and believe me I would never go on one if I had to pay. Im working 24/7 not having a holiday. I think you will find if teachers had to pay for school trips no trips would ever be organised for the children. I dont think you realise what hard work it is taking children on a school trip.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 07/01/2009 23:30

King i have been called worse, I am opinionated and have no problem admitting that i just think things should be fair for all children not just a selected few.

TBH I can't wait for July when ds1 finishes this school

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