Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed at the leaflet telling me how happy my kids will be if i go back to work?

161 replies

neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 11:37

I got this with my child benefit letter yesterday.

It is a leaflet about affordable childcare, and the pic on the front is a cartoon of some kids playing with a train and it says 'we play with trains, mum goes to work - whoo whoo!'.

It says to me: your kids will be happier if you go to work.

To be fair, I noticed on the back it has kids playing with musical instruments and it says 'we do music, dad goes to the office, rat a tat tat' so i think it is just some poor puns on trains and music rather than kids going 'way hey - mum's gone to work!!'

But I still think it is a bit

OP posts:
gagamama · 06/01/2009 12:15

I think 'whoo whoo' is meant to be the noise trains make as opposed to 'whoo hoo' which is an exclamation of joy. May be a really crap play on words though, as you say.

To be fair though, it is advertising, the job of any kind of advertising is to make you think life would be better if you did/bought the thing being advertised. So, I think YABU.

TheCrackFox · 06/01/2009 12:19

YANBU, I thought the same too. My DCs are happy (I am a SAHM) and I am sure WOHMs DCs are happy too. No idea why the government thinks what I do all day is any of their business.

MrsBadger · 06/01/2009 12:22

now as a wohm myself I took it as an affirmation that it's ok to be a wohm and your kids won;t suffer
not as an inducement to become a wohm if you are happy sahming

welcome change from the guiltmongering actually - many wohms do it because they need to not as a lifestyle choice.

Original poster
neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 12:22

But govt leaflets should not be advertising, they should be informative only surely?

I think the govt would be very happy if all mums were in work, paying taxes and boosting the economy no matter what the effect on children (that would be for future govts to worry about).

OP posts:
blueshoes · 06/01/2009 12:22

It is just propaganda, and clumsy at that. Meant for the masses, who would never pay attention anyway. Bin it.

Original poster
neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 12:24

Never thought of it that way, Mrsbadger.

But do you need the govt to affirm your choice, surely you do what it best for you and your family regardless?

OP posts:
Original poster
neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 12:24

I did bin it blueshoes... had to dig it out this morning to check what it actually said. It had the DTs porridge on it

OP posts:
Original poster
neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 12:26

BTW, I am not a SAHM, I am on mat leave and will be putting DTs in nursery when I go back to work in July.

OP posts:
Indiechick · 06/01/2009 12:27

I read it back to front so as a WOHM felt a bit fed up that it was about daddy going to work and kiddie playing and presumably mum in the kitchen somewhere or cleaning (she wasn't even mentioned!), should have turned it over and would have felt affirmed in manner of mrsbadger.

backalleysally · 06/01/2009 12:27

I think you're being a tad touchy about it!

If you're happy being a SAHM than that's all that matters. Don't feel like you have to defend your choice.

blueshoes · 06/01/2009 12:30

neeztwinz, @ porridge. On the issue of informational v. advertising leaflets, if you accept their child benefit, you got to receive whatever they dish out as part of that cash handout.

Bramshott · 06/01/2009 12:32

I think it's meant to be re-assuring - i.e. "we can help you find quality affordable childcare and your kids will be fine if you go back to work" but I agree, it is clumsily done and a bit of a crap leaflet. The govt have been very open about their goal being to encourage as many people as possible into work though, so it's hardly surprising they are advertising the fact.

ipanemagirl · 06/01/2009 12:43

Yeah but what about when the children are sick and you have to miss work? If you don't have family nearby or friends that don't work, you're stuffed. That's why all this 'childcare' talk irritates me. My sister manages to work because her husband is always around 'working' from home and 2 grandmothers are nearby. So she has endless options for short notice emergencies etc. I don't have a relative for 60 miles! And also, when I worked in the media, the day doesn't end at 5.30. It just doesn't! So women who manage to stay working in the media either have partners who work from home, biddable grandparents or enough money to afford an au pair. What if you don't come under any of those? It's just so unrealistic for people who are basically pretty loaded.

noonki · 06/01/2009 12:45

Oh I got one too, what bugged me most was the way it made out it was so easy to understand how to get help with childcare costs.

Part of my job is to assist single mum's people back to work and by far the hardest bit when people want to work is sorting out affordable childcare withour some sort of degree in the system.

Especially if people are coming of benefits, it can be so hard to sort out how much they will be entitled to. Dependent on where they live what childcare they can access, any employee voucher schemes etc etc...

So that leaflet made me snort.

DorisIsAPinkDragon · 06/01/2009 12:47

Got this before Christmas and it needled me too so def NBU.

FWIW I just thought what a waste of another umpteen thousands of pounds on an initative that will bear very little fruit I mean FGS who thinks this is an appropriate way to encourage women back into the workplace ( which I presume is the ultimate aim) has anyone ever actually acted on one of these????

On top of that, it's just more government generated waste to recycle!!!!!

Original poster
neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 12:58

I don't feel the need to defend my choice, I feel very lucky that I don't need to work (tho I am going back one/two days a week in July). I just felt kind of sad that this leaflet was making it look like your kids would be happier if you went to work.

It says "Affordable Childcare: great for your kids, great for you."

I agree it is OK for kids, not sure it is 'great'.

OP posts:
Original poster
neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 13:00

What would be 'great' for kids is if the govt made it more financially viable for women to stay at home and look after their own kids.

Not sure how they would do that tho!

OP posts:
backalleysally · 06/01/2009 13:00

Affordable childcare would be great for those who need to return to work.

blueshoes · 06/01/2009 13:02

Not sure I would agree that it would be 'great' for all kids to be looked after by their mums (or dads, I assume) either. It is a generalisation either way, good and bad parents etc.

As I said, clumsy.

OrmIrian · 06/01/2009 13:07

No IMO it says 'if you go to work you kids will be happy'. not 'if you go to work your kids will be happier'.

Anyway judging by my slightly distracted mothering skills and the amazing things my DC did at CM's house, they were

Original poster
neenztwinz · 06/01/2009 13:44

Yeah, you are right OrmIrian. It is just saying they will be happy, not necessarily happier. I am just being a bit touchy cos it does annoy me that the govt try to get mums to go back to work. Yes it is great for mums who need to go back to work to have affordable childcare, but for me it is not worth me working cos after tax and childcare I'd only make about £5 a day. DH earns too much so we wouldn't get tax credits which is great for me cos no question I will not work (much).

Would some women be secretly happy if it was not financially viable for them to return to work ie if the govt didn't incentivise them to go back?

OP posts:
Sunshine78 · 06/01/2009 13:45

I think its just making sure people know there are options and not just saying I cant afford to go back to work so I want. They are also just trying to get the message across that children are not harmed in any way emotionaly by being in childcare - both mine were from 6 months old and they are growing up happy confident safe in the knowledge they are loved but going to work is what I as a grown up want to do.

blueshoes · 06/01/2009 13:48

neenztwinz, on your last question, why would women be secretly happy to not have government initiatives which incentivise them to work by making it financially viable to?

If they want to work, hurrah. If not, don't take up those incentives. What does it matter what the government does or want to promote if you are clear in your head what it is you want and think is best for YOUR family?

Are you conflicted about returning to your very pt work?

souperdahrlink · 06/01/2009 13:48

That annoyed me too! My kids are perfectly happy at home thanks very much. They can play trains to their hearts content here.

I also think it's incredibly patronising to suggest that it's easy to get a job and find childcare that meets your needs. If mine were in childcare the only backup for when they are ill, or need to go to the dentist, or the doctors or whatever, is me. I'm sure any employer would soon get fed up of me taking time off here there and everywhere to sort it. That's before you even get anywhere near having to deal with wraparound care for school age kids.

Tamarto · 06/01/2009 13:49

I got the letter but not the leaflet, what does that say about me?