to want my DS to attend a more white than black school?

[NattyTurkeyAndEggnog]

am posting this timidly in case it is misinterpred...

there is a choice of two catholic schools locally, one is three quaters black african, and the other is three quaters white british.

now i said to dh that id prefer the white majority school, as i feel my white children would fit in better, and i would with the other parents. i dont mean it in a way that i think white ppl are better, or anything like that, in fact the other school has higher exam results. just that i am concerned with sending my child to a school that they will be very much a minority.

but DH said that he should go to the better results school.

now im torn, because im very aware that kids pick up on a child being different, and i was bullied horrendously in school.

please dont read this as a black/white thing, i would feel the same about him going to a non-religous school for the same reasons.

ok i will stand back and wait for the back lash now

what TBE said

plus if your DS really has difficulty with different looking people because of his SN would it not be a good idea to imerse him in a very diverse environment NOW when he is still young so that he can learn to cope with it rather than have him carry his issues with him to further education and adult life?

ah sal yes it could, but what if it makes him regress and we lose all the progress we've had in the last 6 months?
wouldnt it be better to introduce it later on when he has more of a handle on his condition?

if it helps at all, whatever school I was sent to woulda been wrong because for a good few years EVERYTHING my mum did was wrong in my eyes

" Am I being unreasonable? : to want my DS to attend a more white than black school? ...please dont read this as a black/white thing"
pmsl.

whyanyone botheed to anser is beyond me

the op is a pure bollock brain

Natty, I've just seen your profile and realise that you're 21 (or thereabouts, depending on when you last updated it).

You left school just a few years ago - no wonder the experience is still raw. Have you ever received counselling? If not I think you absolutely MUST - it's clearly affecting your life and, whether or not you realise it, it is affecting the way you bring up your children. Once you have dealt with this aspect of your past you'll realise that you've been living in a little prison without being aware of it.

Come on, Custardo - read further! I'm black but I'm not giving her a hard time!

"ah sal yes it could, but what if it makes him regress and we lose all the progress we've had in the last 6 months?
wouldnt it be better to introduce it later on when he has more of a handle on his condition?"

I really dont know, I dont think that's something you can predict though and it might be a case of one step forward, two steps back for a few years till it really starts to go in the right direction but you prob have to take risks in order to make progress and your posts just sound so full of fear for him which is understandable but possibly counter-productive

lol no im 24

White British people may not suffer from racism to anything like the same extent as your average Black or Asian or other minority ethnic group. Although it is still possible to suffer from racism - my little sister was attacked by a group of Asian men when she was a teenager, for daring to walk through a mainly Asian area (where we lived at the time) while being young, female and wearing school uniform (long sleeved blazer/jumper/knee length skirt and long socks...)

But it is REALLY unhelpful to see prejudice simply as 'evil white rich people oppressing Black/Asian/minority people'. Actually the working classes - of whatever colour - have been the victims of oppression, prejudice, discrimination and injustice for centuries. The Lancashire cotton workers recognised the link between slavery and the sort of prejudice and injustice they suffered - to the point of risking their survival to support American slaves during the US Civil War. People in Lancashire starved rather than support slavery.

This guy was a local hero in my mother's town - not because he was the first Black army officer but because he was an ace footballer and one of the very few working class boys to make good. He died thirty years before my mother was born but he was still spoken about in her childhood.

I don't mean to belittle the countless injustices that racism has caused, but discrimination is much more than that.

yes i am afraid, very much so. just dont want him to spend his childhood miserable like i did

Natty, on a happy note. I think bulling is less tolerated in Catholic Schools. I don't believe for a minute you are racist, I think it is fear of the unknown and perhaps a little ignorance. just visit both schools and do what ever feels right or you.
I softened when I saw pictures of your DC, they are soo cute.

mumsnet have just emailed me to say they wont delete the thread, and that if i feel any post are a direct attack to me i can have them removed
MN on my side maybe?

p.s. in my humble un-qualified opinion (as in not a parent of a child with SN) I suspect that the less you expose him to the less he will learn to cope with IMO

And I'd think very hard about it if I faced sending ds to a school where he would be very different from everyone else. For whatever reason. I was bullied at one school for being obviously different, having just moved a hundred miles. Horrible, miserable shitty experience it was too.

So I'm hoping then that you've had counselling and it's helped you free yourself from your past?

thank you edam

edam . Where's yer Christmas/holiday season name?

Thanks for that. You always seem to raise the tone.

Come back Mars!!!!

mrsmerry, i have been waiting 7 years for councilling on NHS..
i have given up hope
wish i was middle class, then i would pay for it!

that was sarcastically.. btw in case anyone wants to say in class-ist now...

I can't think of anything I haven't used before, Bauble, and am too bored to use it again. Any ideas welcomed...

(Being accused of raising the tone makes me feel all Hyacinth Bucket. )