Need to get this off my chest before Monday - It's about Red Heads !

[KatieDD]

I was telling a tale in the playground about how i'd put my foot in it in the maternity ward.
The jist was that my DD was born with loads of hair, looked like a little monkey but it was dark brown.
Anyway a woman on my ward said oh hasn't she got lovely hair and without looking up from my magazine I said yes thank god it's not red like her dad's. Of course I looked up and she and her newborn had red hair.
I cringed, went back to the magazine she walked off.
If you heard this tale and had a son with red hair would YOU be mortally offended ??

I ask because on Thursday this happened and the woman who is pig ignorant at the best of times on Friday said hello to the person I was talking to and made a point of not saying hello to me, she's just looking for a reason to kick off again, we've had a few moments in the past.
I know it's petty but she has sat in my living room and told me my youngest has got better looking with age so she's not adverse to putting her foot in it herself.

I just know this is leading to an atmospher tomorrow grrr.

better looking with age??

your comment obviously upset her, for her to come back with that!

No, no she said that many many months before this, totally unprovoked.

I know she's allowed to come out with shit like that and I grit my teeth but a story about a redhaired child that wasn't hers and there will be murder tomorrow and if we both go to the Christmas party it will ruin it, happened before.

oh i see

I've got 2 children with red hair. It wouldn't have bothered me a bit and I would just have laughed. She's a bit oversensitive from the sound of it.

I cannot believe a grown adult would get in a huff about such a thing.

Daft person.

Can't you just completely ignore her?

I honestly can't see the point of engaging with someone so ill-bred that she ignores you when she's talking to someone with you.

My DS has red hair btw and i'd be pissed off if I thought you'd made the remark deliberately but not at all if I knew you hadn't realised my DS was red-haired.

When my ds was born the doc lifted him and said "at least he hasn't got red hair" - she was a red-head herself.

Redheads do get a hard time though, which I don't understand - most of my cousins and uncles have red hair, but they just laughed when my dp told the story of how he'd get out the bleach if ds had of been born a red-head (dp has classic foot-in-mouth syndrome).

Sorry, but what you said was very offensive. Can't see why you wouldn't think it was, especially as you have a dp with red hair.

Yes I would find it very offensive, I am a red head & have been very relieved that my children don't have my hair because it is a horrid stigma to grow up with it.

Your op is quite confusing to understand though.

hmmm, saying that your child has gotten better looking with age - a compliment, although possibly a backhanded one.

You insulted her newborn at a time when mothers are the most protective......

BTW, That is exactly the sort of thing I would say.

sigh

You are right I should just keep away, the problem is (this sounds pathetic, it's worse than being at school yourself), she's a dinner lady at the school so I worry sick that she'll take it out on the kids, not doing anything but normally she does their coats up or if they have a problem they go to her and tell.

Also there's a little gang if you like of mums I get on with and she's always in the thick of it, really I should just get it out in the open tomorrow and then ignore her, so at least everybody knows what a prat she is.

No Purpleduck I didn't insult her newborn, it was some random woman at the hospital, if she'd got the hump I'd completely understand.
This woman is hearing the story, 6 years later about somebody else and still gets the hump.

How weird!

But it doesn't take away from the fact that what you said was offensive.

It is offensive in a way because people think they can insult someone for the colour of their hair, but could you imagine doing it about the colour of someone's skin?? You would never even think of it.

I don't get the whole deal about redheads. I think it's lovely, but then I am Irish.

Well ok that's interesting to hear, thank you.

She does sound upset by it. Could you not just apologise and ask if you can put it behind you, adding in a little compliment about her newborn?

She hasn't got a newborn

Why on earth would you say thank God her hair is not red?
What a horrible comment.

Oh. Then I misread your post.

I still this can be resolved by you making a heartfelt apology, newborn or not.

Because her dad has red hair so there was a good chance she might have had it and he was bullied because of it at school, so no I wasn't queing up for a redhead personally.

I'm not actually that sorry so I think I'll just leave her to her huffing.

I don't understand your last post, sorry.

About my DD's dad or me not being sorry ?