to only spend £50 each on my kids this year?

[SmugColditz]

it never occured to me that I would be unreasonabl;e to do this, but an aquaintance of mine has said "Oh, X says she is only spending £50 each on her kios this year, I think that's really tight, don't you?"

And me being me, I told her I was only spending £50 each too (less on ds2, if I'm honest) because what the hell is the point of spending more than you can afford, and that she herself says her kids broke all their Christmas presents in 3 weeks.

And she looked horrified.

So, if you have a 'normal' or less than average income, how much are you spending on your kids, and AIBU?

Ladyevenstar, how old is your DS1? If he's still a young child, will he not feel sad if he doesnt get at least one little gift?

Curly he is not getting anything because he has been very very nasty and naughty to me and smashed all of my psp games because he hasn't got one. DS1 is 10....I don't know why i keep saying he won't get anything because I know i won't be able to stick to it lol.

Oooooohhhhh.......

er, didn't know what else to say to that!

haven't come to that bridge yet - my two are only 2 and 4 and threats work a treat to get 'em to behave at the moment. How long does that last for then?!

lol curly god knows

DS1s 2nd christmas we got everything from nearly new sales and charity shops, my parent got quite a bit like that too, and I don't think he's seen such a christmas since (probably the year he got the most and we spent the least). He has an understanding that DH has not been working since he had an op last year so has only asked for Animal Crossing for his DS that he got last year as joint gift from us and all GPs (he was thrilled, it was my best christmas moment ever because we'd told him he wouldn't get one). This year DS 1 & 2 are choosing a toy each from the stash in the loft of their ooutgrown stuff to give to DS3 as their gift. They have both chosen something that was given to them for xmas/birthday (rather than a random toy that isn't special or one that belonged to the other) which I think is lovely.
I agree the important thing is what you make of the day itself (and the traditions in the run up) more than what you spend, but it is a difficult area to pass judgement on. DH usually has to work xmas so it is about GPs and other family normally. It is extra special when he is home so I can see why you would make more of it if that was the case.
But the OP is NBU as it is down to individual choice.

i spend around £80 each on my children i have 7 of them
we do not have any family just us so the only gifts they get are from me
but tbh its not an exact amount
that amount on the older ones but i have a 4 mth old to so just a small gift there
and we are spending xmas at butlins and that cost £1000 so part of there treat is that to
as for me and my dh last year we bought ourselves a car not an expensive one
this year we are buying ourselves new laptops each as we have to fight to get the the family pc........lol
no we dont take credit out to pay for it just save

It's not about what you spend it's how you spend it. A thoughtful pressie costing £10 is much better than a totally unsuiable one costing more.

I'd rather have/give something wanted and have put time thought into it than any old tat someone had rushed into a shop to buy regardless of the cost.

cant believe this is still going#

colditz, mine wrote letters to santa yesterday. They have asked for musical keyrings they are £1.99 each

We'll be spending less than £50 on DS. It just depends on the circumstances and personal choices. My son is only 2. No doubt in years to come we will spend much more on him for Xmas.

I was starting to feel slight peer pressure from other new mums at baby groups to buy lots for ds1 (4months) this christmas - but he really won't notice!!! however have now increased my resolve not to splash out on the latest bit of overpriced brightly colored plastic etc etc.

At this stage I get only what he needs and am trying not to let the house be overrun with baby toys!!! Am sure I will make more of christmas as he gets older and plan to start saving monthly from Jan.

Gah! I start to get all scrooge like at this time of year although to be honest it's only a reaction to the stress that is to come.

Every single year we have tantrums from DSD as in her words she "didn't get much stuff!".
Last year she had a psp and 4 games from us, plus stocking fillers plus a large pile at her mums as well.
Yr before she had a bratz aeroplane (i know but she did beg for it)and stocking fillers, plus big pile at her mums, ....
This year she has presented us with a huge long list that includes lists of various psp games at £30 each, a robot type thing at £200, lots of different plasticy girly things as advertised on nicktoons etc, flat screen pink tv, ipod, etc etc.

I've given up. It's up to partner to buy for her this christmas and he can put up with the tantrums.

As far as i'm concerned, christmas isn't about how much you spend or how many presents you get. Some years i've been better off and spent more than others, as others have said it's all relative. I've never put myself in debt for christmas and never will.
Dd has always had things bought for her that she really wanted and also that i thought would last longer than the christmas day adrenaline rush. She's always had a great christmas whether i've spent £5 or £250.

I have begun to really dislike the whole commercial aspect of christmas. It spoils it for everyone i think.

gosh, its nice to know that everybody seems to share in the same stresses about what to spend at Christmas. I have three kids, am new to the site so i suppose that means 3dc. 10 8 4, middle child has quite pointedly told me that there is no such thing as FC and that your parents do the job......very upset the 10 year old is still totally convinced.
I used to believe that my children would like me more if they got lots of pressies......am now very wise and understand that one gift that is wanted is better than a pile of junk that will be broken in a matter of days. I am buying eldest dd a second hand ipod......she will be delighted and will have no qualms about it being secondhand. DS will have lego and DD number 2 will get a pile of polly pocket type stuff off ebay. Our Christmas day will be spent singing, playing games going to church, eating and drinking lots and generally having a brilliant time. Heres to happy children who appreciate what they have in their lives rather than what is in their stocking.

Stewie,noo this is my ds1 (10yr old) that broke my games. Pathetic that I am so annoyed by it I know. His reason for it was that he wanted a psp and didn't have one....well initially. ( i do have probs with him and have asked previously for advice although his problems are caused by lack of visits/contact with his father) Hence the reason I said I won't be buying him anything for xmas. DP and I agreed last night that we are going to spend £50 on each of the 3 boys...but we know this will cause problems with dss as he wants a £250 guitar as he doesn't think the one we bought him last yr is good enough!!! oh dear what a shame lol....as far as I am concerned we are spending the same on all of them.

ds1 (2.3) asked for a kiss and cake for christmas when i talked about writing a letter to santa

we are being sensible this year and he has a lot of books to be wrapped up plus stocking fillers and that will probably be it.

ds2 (7m) will be getting some small things but not a huge amount as he will get much more satisfaction playing with the wrapping paper from ds1's presents!

Spent about £5 on each of my DS for their first Xmas and don't think I ahve ever spent more than £50 on them! This year DS1 will be 4 and I guess I will spend around £50 on one biggish present and stocking fillers. 1 year old DS1 wiull probably cost us less. I ciuld afford more but I just don't thnk it is necessary.

We spent last Xmas with my SIL, they have far less money than us and had bought (imo) an obscene amount for their kids. What was worse they all just dived in a ripped everything open and then tyossed it a side, I foundf it quite upsetting!!!

Ah, the great Christmas debate!

No I don't think it's unreasonable at all. Spend what you want to/can afford to etc.

Christmas is a problematic topic of conversataion in this house. Every year our family seems to just keep expanding - 3 new babies in 2007, 2 new babies in 2008 so far. That's a welcome baby gift, Christening gift, Christmas gift, Birthday present! The line has to be drawn at some point!

So this year I have said, I'll buy Chistmas presents for close family members' children (that's 4) and I picked up a small top or something for them in the sales. I will buy for my Gran. That is all the extended family I can afford to buy for. The rest get Christmas cards.

My close family, i.e. mum, dad, sisters - I have set a £20.00 limit on each and WILL NOT go over that. I only have one child (17 months) and have set a £100.00 limit. This may seem excessive to most but I'm a single mum and she never gets anything from her dad or his side of the family, so kind of feel like I'm left to fill that gap.

The £100.00 has bought her a few big items including a fisher price play kitchen that was £30.00. I didn't want lots of small bits for her this year as they're too much flippin hassle to store away - and bits get lost! She will then have a few stocking fillers like socks, tights, play mobile phone, crayons, chocolate etc.

So I should be bringing Chistmas in for roughly £220.00 this year. That's also including rapping paper, cards etc - which I bought on the cheap as I'm not 'doing' the whole expensive wrapping paper and cards thing anymore - waste of money.

I did however burn a huge hole in my pocket yesterday as dd had decided now was a good time to grow out of all of her clothes, £150.00 later her wardrobe's been re-stocked!

Ikea is a fab place to pick up toys btw, and they're cheap.

Am I the only one who is somewhat concerned about how many people already have all their Christmas presents bought?

I don't tend to set a min/max but get a few stocking fillers, a smallish pressie from mummy and daddy and then a biggish pressie from FC. Altogether this will prob come in around £50 each. What's the point in just buying stuff for the sake of it??

We've just forked out £70 for a bike for DS's birthday, so there's no way we're spending anywhere near £50 at Christmas. We'll probably spend about £20 on each child (4, and 17mths) - at this age they really don't need a lot, and our house is full of stuff they never play with. REALLY don't want to end up with shallow materialistic brats

Hi I have spent £3.99 on my DS what do you make of that! It was for a set of paints, a lady at playgroup is giving me an Early Learning Centre Easel that she doesn't use anymore, and my mum said she had already brought and put away a sponge painting set. His other gran has bought him a lifesize remote control fire engine thing (ok not lifesize but very big!) and he will get more presents from aunties, uncles and friends. He is 3 so that will be an easel and paints, a fire engine and loads of other pressies in a stocking.
I have 9 other kids nephews and nieces etc to buy for (just something small like a High School Musical notepad or I decorate a photo frame and put in a picture of them with all their cousins). Plus a couple of adults (mum dad, in laws, sister in law, and one brother as we take it in turns each Christmas)
My husband and I dont buy for each other but this extra money gives us the chance to accept all the invites for works dos, going to see friends and going out New Years Eve.
I dont think my DS misses out on Christmas by us not spending loads of money on him. He is 3.

i don't intend to spend a lot this year - never do, really, and don't feel bad about it as the kids always have a great time. There is always an amount of peer pressure - one of my friends is spending £400 on each of her daughters - I just think that's ridiculous, but it's her life! One year, when I was skint beyond belief, a friend gave me some disney bedding and curtains, which I wrapped up for ds (then 4). He loved them and was none the wiser about the fact that they were second hand and free!

im trying to keep to a minimum this year but my 14 yr old is asking for psp games ouch. by the way you can get tv/dvd combos for £68 in asda and they are brill