in getting so fed up of being skint and having to read about people who claim to be skint bbut are buying games consoles for their DC when mine will have to have whatever I can scrape from the charity shop or freecycle?

[conniedescending]

I know this is a bit 'living in a council house with flat screen tv' and I'v always been hugely against benefit bashing threads but I'm wondering if the worm has turned?

we are struggling to pay the essentials, my DH is working all the hours he possibly can in a job thats not going well at all (due to loss of customers due to aforementioned credit crunch) meanwhile I'm working from whenever he gets home till 1/2 am, 6 days a week trying to make up the shortfall.

Have had a disastrous week as washing machine packed up and my mum is on holiday so I can't use hers. I have a baby in cloth nappies so have had to buy disposables. Have spent all morning or the last few days handwashing clothes and deserately trying to get them dry which is impossible in this weather. Cant get to launderetter because car needs mot and we have no money to do that.

Then I saw some small toy items on freecylce that I asked for and hoped I'd get because the lady who was offering them has had several items from me (curtains, breadmaker and some hardly worn shoes). Anyway - she's not gifting me them (was hoping they may be okfor xmas pressies).

so I come on MN and read threads about people on benefits who are skint and have 'only' bought nintendos ds'or a wii...........

honestly have no clue how we are going to get through this - we have eaten into both our overdrafts, looking to increase income in everyway possible, have cut back everything to the bone. There is no safety net there now at all and I am starting to really worry.

We have a wedding we're supposed to go to next mth as well - god knows how we are going to make that, plus birthdays galore.

cant see the wood for the trees at the minute

it was a question Zombies. I don't know what the Xmas appeal is or where the thread is.

phew that's ok then NDTH.

I love my free credit - 'tis fabulous. Especially when you're paying it back out of money that someone else is paying you back and it's not coming out of your regular monthly budget .

Aaaaah - Here Coffee

wish SN catalogues did credit. The switch adapted stuff is stupidly expensive and you have to pay for it all at once. I wanted some fibre optics lights for dd to go on her switch but they are £500. So we're saving slowly.
dd can't have non-SN toys really.

We've had threads like this before, and things are not always as they seem.

My kids have a wii, and are getting wii fit for xmas, but not from me. They have a very generous uncle, who also happens to be a bit of a games/computer geek and so likes to buy them the latest consoles etc so that he can play along with them. We also have another relative who works in the games industry and often gives us games for free.

We're on benefits after oh lost his job not long back . . . Xmas was very nearly cancelled as we're struggling so much!

I don't understand the whole "live on benefits you'll be flush" thing . . . maybe for some but certainly not here.

Xmas will be home-made or charity shop stuff for all this year & I don't care any more what people think. You're better off living within your means I have learned (the hard way) & if that means charity shops, a tight budget for everything & writing lists of what you can & can't have then so be it.

I don't think it's unreasonable at all to be pissed off when people say they've "only got a Wii for the kids, or PS3" or whatever other expensive item they're buying! Not sure some of them actually understand that 'skint' is having to borrow from the lo's copper jar until whatever day payday is just to get enough milk to keep you going, not buying something like that on credit & only just making minimum payments

that sucks NMC .

lucy - I can assure you that I know what skint means.

one good pressie idea is books. Charity shops have tons of the things. One year I bought a random selection of 10 books for my sister and mum, things that looked interesting that they might not thought of reading by themslevses.
Some were rubbish but they both read stories they might not have piced up.

needmorecoffee - that is a brilliant idea, far better than a fecking electronic picture frame - that shows real consideration for what you think your mum and sister might like - shame my mum doesn't read.

wedding costs is travel costs because we'd need to MOT the car and then find petrol and then find money for a gift - feel really bad skiping it because they are close friends and came to our wedding

I know, I know, I know its terrible bringing up how can people on benefits afford thse things and part of me knows its fuckwittage to think like this but at the minute I can't help it. We've worked hard or what little we have and in space of 6 months its crashing down around our ears. Not sure what u call a big mortgage (certainly not a big house but bought at near enough the peak of housing market)but with that going up and income going down plus tax credits stopping we have a shortfall every mth. I cant help but think there's a luxury in knowing your home is secure when you are in housing association house and get housing benefit.

I hadn't realised peole were getting these consoles on credit (bad mistake btw - does none listen to the news???) and my kids wouldn't want a console anyway but when you are living on 4 hrs sleep a night and your husband comes home from another 15hr day demoralised having lost another customer it's hard not to feel despondent and completely fucked off.

This is nothing to do with the xmas appeal btw. Just a good old rant and moan about how tough things are for us at the minute.

Can I just point out that despite my latest threads...I AM NOT AFTER THE CHRISTMAS APPEAL!

I am really paranoid about people thinking that! Not sure if the christmas appeal comment was aimed at me but I was to point out that really, I never thought about that when posting any of my threads.

As I've just pointed out on my 'christmas' thread, I've finished with christmas this year.

oh, i'd have gone and bought myself a box of choccies, NMC. seriously.

Connie - We are on SOME housing benefit.

DH also works hard, and comes home feeling shit because that is how they treat him.

I am trying to build up a business but it is very slow and hard whilst trying to do it from home with 2 children - one a very active toddler.

Our house is not secure - we are in a private rented place (housing list round here is endless and we earn too much anyway), so we have security for 6 months at a time.

Bills are going up like everyone else's, income is not.

I know you are finding it hard, but we all are, and making people who are trying their hardest to make things better and who already feel like the scum of the earth for claiming benefits anyway doesn't do anything to help anyone

I should of but I prefer to nark on about it all year
Connie, just skip the wedding. Good friends understand (and who notices anyhow). No point in getting into more debt and getting stressed.
Nothing wrong with a rant and moan. I feel like that quite often. DH worked hard at his career then dd was born brain damaged and it changed everything. He gave up work when I couldn't cope so we are skint and always will be. Bugger all we can do about it but need a moan every now and then.

Oh lovey - it all sounds like bloody hard work at the mo'. I know people who have plenty of money and are quite happy getting most of the kids' xmas presents from NCT sales. We are ok 'just' at present but most of mine and the kids' clothes are second hand I think very carefully before I buy presents. This is all fine.

I do think that EthanChristopher or whatever has spoiled the ethos of the christmas appeal as he/she was very anxious to be included

thanks NMC - think we will skip the wedding but I feel terrible about it, like I'm letting them down

the loss of the washing machine has just thrown me - made me realise we have absolutely no backup plan, safety net or whatever at all.........

Connie, it sounds like you do need a night out. Would it be possible to cadge a lift to the wedding? Speak to the bride and groom and ask if there is anyone who could bring you. And don't worry about a wedding present for now. You have a whole year after the wedding to give them one. We were still getting presents ages after ours.

We have lived on benefits. Its horrible or atleast it was for us. Our money depended on the system not cocking up. WHICH it did continually. Try shopping for 3 adults and a toddler with £20 for a week and a half. Now dh is working long hours and we are better off than we have been in a long time. I have not even started xmas shopping but am looking forward to not having to wince over how much every little present costs. And we are still by no means rich but not being poor means a lot to me Also you do have a mortgage which is a lot more than a lot of people have and certainly more than most people on benefits ever stand a chance of having. OTOH I know quite a few people ripping off the system completly who are rolling in it to the extent of keeping their savings in a relatives name this made me so mad when I found out so I understand where you are coming from. I know I am not making much sense but have preggy brain and am surprised that most of the words are spelt right!

I dont think it has to do whith benefits etc. and people on benefits dont have to explain what they buy and why.

People have diferent priorities. Personally i dont like wiifit or games, i wouldnt get them if they were free. But if others do, it is their bussiness.

I ve lived shortly once on benefits and it wasnt easy at all, you dont live in luxury.
But i also sympathise with OP and those who work full time and still cant afford many things. But just no need to get it on people who are on benefits

sadly, with the ranks of the unemployed increasing, you're going to see more antipathy towards folks on benefits.

don't see how darling's plan to spend our way out a recession is going to work with both unemployment and inflation going up.

i mean, duh, your average Big Issue seller can tell you that doesn't add up.

likewise Kerry - I@m ok this year, but ironically it's because I have to move house that I'm ok - was contributing towards the mortgage (in exH's name) but he can no longer afford to keep the repayments up so told me to save that money i'd been using for that to find somewhere to live when the house is either sold (it's on the market now) or repossessed.

Neither of these options is going to happen that quickly so I can use some of the money i was scraping together for "housing" (I don't get HB) for rent and deposit somewhere early next year, and the rest I can use for Christmas, DS2's birthady and DS3's Christening.

Find it rather though that things are slightly easier at the moment because I'm being forced to move