in getting so fed up of being skint and having to read about people who claim to be skint bbut are buying games consoles for their DC when mine will have to have whatever I can scrape from the charity shop or freecycle?

[conniedescending]

I know this is a bit 'living in a council house with flat screen tv' and I'v always been hugely against benefit bashing threads but I'm wondering if the worm has turned?

we are struggling to pay the essentials, my DH is working all the hours he possibly can in a job thats not going well at all (due to loss of customers due to aforementioned credit crunch) meanwhile I'm working from whenever he gets home till 1/2 am, 6 days a week trying to make up the shortfall.

Have had a disastrous week as washing machine packed up and my mum is on holiday so I can't use hers. I have a baby in cloth nappies so have had to buy disposables. Have spent all morning or the last few days handwashing clothes and deserately trying to get them dry which is impossible in this weather. Cant get to launderetter because car needs mot and we have no money to do that.

Then I saw some small toy items on freecylce that I asked for and hoped I'd get because the lady who was offering them has had several items from me (curtains, breadmaker and some hardly worn shoes). Anyway - she's not gifting me them (was hoping they may be okfor xmas pressies).

so I come on MN and read threads about people on benefits who are skint and have 'only' bought nintendos ds'or a wii...........

honestly have no clue how we are going to get through this - we have eaten into both our overdrafts, looking to increase income in everyway possible, have cut back everything to the bone. There is no safety net there now at all and I am starting to really worry.

We have a wedding we're supposed to go to next mth as well - god knows how we are going to make that, plus birthdays galore.

cant see the wood for the trees at the minute

I'm surrounded by people who appear to me to be absolutely loaded. Half the families around here swan off abroad for half term.

Then I come on MN and am absolutely incredulous at the amount of money people seem to have.

DH and I both have good degrees and I have a post grad .... but we're still on similar freelance wages to the ones we were on when we just started out, before children.

We're probably shit at money, but we work so hard, all the time and it grates on me when I see all the greedy bastards with huge fat salaries. They're not better people than me and they certainly don't work harder. By God if I had my life again ...

my post was meant for the,
christmas 08, "Think the kids may be disapointed this year"
again op i am sorry.
xx

i can't read the whole thread just now (just going out to lunch and at work, so time tight etc - )

i got a new washing machine from the british/scottish gas energy trust when mine died and i couldn't afford to get it fixed.

www.britishgasenergytrust.org.uk//here they're very helpful.

sorry! link-stupidity..#

try again!

connie - it's not a big ask - it's only a big ask if you're specifying that it must be x make, y drum size, and that it's in perfect looking condition .

Lots of people end up with an old (but working) washing machine when doing up their kitchen, or when they decide to upgrade

Dh woks hard but is only income as we decided I would stay at home to look after our 4 children. we do not have any game consoles or flat screen Tv or anything high tech really, (appart from the family computer, yes just the one for all of us...)the children do not all have a tv in the bedroom (also as they are all sharing the same one it would be fairly economical.It might seem for outsiders that we are having a hard time but believe me we do always have nice food on the table and the children never complain of being bored. I do not have a solution for your wedding gift problem , but as far as children birthday presents we have recently found a solution: we gave them £5 each to spend on whaterver took their fancy. Unbelievebale, they managed to find super toys on sale (tamagotchis, cars...) and still have some leftover to buy some sweets. They are very efficient when it is there own money and do understand in an instant that money does not grow on trees. I admit, it is hardeer with adults but please whaterver you do , never feel bad because you cannot afford something someone on benefits could. Pride (not misplaced on, but the one that keeps you active) and good education have got no price tag.

I dont understand why we/MN'etters are so resentful of what other people may earn or what benefits they may or may not be given?

The 60K combined income is not a lot when you see that the bloke is working twice as many hours (almost) as "standard". How do we know how much their mortgage is or how many loans they may have to pay off?

Again, "Being skint" is relative.

Pre DD and DH's redundancy we were comfortable with a combined income of about £80K ish (for normal 9-5 hours and little pressure), now we survive on a combined income of about 30K - people manage.

I realise that 30K is not tiny tiny (before I get jumped on) but its relative, its alot different to 80K with the same mortgage and bills to pay!

I think people should stop resenting us and focus on their own lives.

at matilda. I think you may have a case of christmasthreaditus.

I know how you feel
dh & I both work but never have any spare money - have even had to stop the kids swimming lessons because of the worry of how much fuel bills and also having to take unpaid leave while ds was in hospital.
We can afford the essentials and I get to have the odd night out but I don't know the last time dh went out or we went out together.
I managed to get given a new dishwasher on freecycle and am going to keep an eye out for a washing machine too now as ours isn't spinning properly.
We have also told the kids not to expect too much over Christmas and it is dd's birthday in January and she is wanting to have a party which I have hopefully persuaded her not to have but may be able to find something small to do for her.

I wouldn't worry about what other people are doing.

I could afford to buy a Nintendo or whatever for my children but won't be doing it as I don't want them to spend their lives playing computer games.

My parents had little disposable cash when I was growing up but they managed to make Christmas special without spending a fortune...eg. I once asked for a Cindy caravan having seen a flashy one in a shop...instead I got a cindy caravan my father had made himself - he must have found a few pieces of plywood and painted them etc. - I loved playing with it.

If you or your DH are creative maybe there are things you can make (although from your post sounds as though you wouldn't have time. Alternatively maybe you could keep checking freecycle and Ebay and maybe pick up a second hand bargain.
Is there anything you could sell on Ebay to raise some money for xmas presents & wedding?

We don't have a flat screen TV and don't care about such things in the slightest..the TV will be replaced when it breaks like the last one.

Actually NDTH, I do not want sympathy for finding it hard living on 60K a year, and we also do not have a massive mortgage (can't afford a house), we rent and have to pay over a grand a month for the priviledge and we do not have masses of debt either, just some from when I was a SAHM for 6 years (due to twins) and when we lived on DHs 23K income when we actually had more money left over than we have now - can't quite figure that one out!

I was making the point (but some of you are so far up your own backsides that you are not interested in anyone else's point of view) that 60K should be plenty to live on but us working means that we have to pay a lot of that out in childcare and private rent/travel etc so are really no better off and our kids will be getting 50 quid max spent on them at Xmas which I am NOT really bothered about but in this materialistic world we live in, they SEEM to be about the only kids in their classes that do not have a Wii, X Box etc.

Also, can I say that as a couple are happier earning 30K than 80K as we have DD and I don't work and DH has a day a week off.
Money is not the only thing.

Notdoingthehousework - same current combined income and same mortgage payment.

I only have one child though. Am impressed that I can have another one without having to earn more

£1000 a month would rent you a mansion around here. You must all be living in posh ass neighbourhoods.

'£1000 a month would rent you a mansion around here. You must all be living in posh ass neighbourhoods.'

That's actually a very common rent in standard neighbourhoods in several major UK cities. You could easily pay that in Edinburgh for a large-ish flat.

dejavuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Must be the extra kid costing us 30K then - bet you get tax credits as well though

thank for the link persephone....will def give that a shot

We haven't applied for tax credits yet. I need to kick myself up the bottom.

I suppose that I cant apply when on maternity leave?

god I must stop reading the xmas threads...

connie - am an Ebay virgin and have never looked on there before but have you seen some of the prices on there?! Wii consoles bidded on for for 99p . Am sure they are not going to be sold for that price but it seems there are bargains - will see what my 50 quid per kid can stretch to!!!!