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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to resist the pressure to cut my 2-year old boy's hair so he 'looks like a boy'

124 replies

mummy5bellies · 08/09/2008 14:08

William has beautiful flowing locks, and along with his tiny-featured face is often taken for a little girl. This doesn't bother me at all but friends, family and neighbours seem to have a problem. Whats all the about?

OP posts:
tamarto · 08/09/2008 14:09

How old is he?

Original poster
mummy5bellies · 08/09/2008 14:10

two and a half

OP posts:
RubySlippers · 08/09/2008 14:10

My DS has shoulder length blonde hair

he has never had it cut (and is 2.2)

leave it - nothing wrong with long hair on boys IMVHO

expatinscotland · 08/09/2008 14:11

well, i buy into gender stereotypes .

both my little girls have long hair and DS will have his hair cut short because he's a wee boy.

personally, i find long hair on boys looks naff.

fourlittlefeet · 08/09/2008 14:11

does the hair bother him/get in his eyes? I know lots of mums who like their boys to have long hair and have to put up with the comments. As the mother of a girl who looks like a boy, I never mind if she gets mistaken, it doesn't really matter that much to me either. I think if he disliked the comments or was getting teased that would be a different matter.

OrmIrian · 08/09/2008 14:12

Don't do it. I love longer hair on boys.

And 'to make him look like a boy' has to be the worst reason ever.

Original poster
mummy5bellies · 08/09/2008 14:13

Just how I feel - I've no intention of cutting it but find it quite amusing that people think i should

OP posts:
KVC · 08/09/2008 14:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

tamarto · 08/09/2008 14:14

It's up to you, i prefer my boys to look like boys though.

I always get the feeling that mums who have boys with long hair hanker after a girl.

nooname · 08/09/2008 14:15

I get this as ds (2.3) has a major mop of flowing blond curls!

My view is that I'm not cutting his hair until he wants it cut himself, or until he gets upset by people thinking he's a girl. My mum always cut my hair short and people used to think I was a boy - when I was old enough to be aware of it it really upset me and I think my mum was wrong not to give me "girl's" hair.

OTOH, tbh the only people who tend to do this are older people who think boy = short hair, girl = long hair. Most younger people go on more cues than just hair and don't make the same mistake as it is more socially acceptable now for boys to have long/curly hair.

DanJARMouse · 08/09/2008 14:15

Sorry, im with expat on this one.

(Even if at almost 3yo im waiting for DD2's hair to GROW!)

MrsMattie · 08/09/2008 14:15

My son has always had lovely long ringlets. Most people comment on it in a positive way. Beats the scary crew cut look!

2beornot2be · 08/09/2008 14:16

Its bad luck to cut there hair b4 they are 5 My nephew has long blonde hair he is 1 I think u should leave it until ur ready to get it cut

Original poster
mummy5bellies · 08/09/2008 14:17

He does look great, and to be honest, where we live is very chilled and most boys of all ages have longer hair. he can see fine, it doesn't irritate him and I'll cut it when he wants me to . Just wanted to reassure myself that i wasn't being unreasonable in my resistance.
My first day on this site - I'm a newbie - and its great x x

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 08/09/2008 14:17

'Its bad luck to cut there hair b4 they are 5 '

That's got to be the most ridiculous thing I've heard.

DD1's hair grows like a weed and we've had to trim her fringe and ends (she's prone to split ends) since she was 2.

We trim DD2's fringe to keep it out of her eyes.

stillstanding · 08/09/2008 14:18

My DS has rather long hair and is often mistaken for a girl ("such a pretty girl!). It really bugs DH but I am resisting the chop.

But I do think there comes a point. Is your DS's hair longish-short-hair or long-hair-that-can-go-into-a-ponytail? Not so wild about the later and would trim a bit then but what I do really detest is very short hair. All those little crewcuts look really nasty to me.

tamarto · 08/09/2008 14:18

Why what will happen 2be?

Original poster
mummy5bellies · 08/09/2008 14:19

And I'm not hankering for a girl, BTW, I've got one!!

OP posts:
stillstanding · 08/09/2008 14:20

Agree on scary crew cut look, Mrs Mattie. Truly hideous.

BitOfFun · 08/09/2008 14:20

Up to you, obv, but I am with ex-pat myself. If you like lovely curly hair, have a girl or buy a suitable pooch! I think waiting for him to get teased is a bit , nooname. And I used to have a mum who thought pageboy haircuts on girls were cool (it was the 70s...) - I am still traumatised now, and probably will be one of those irritating old ladies who insists on looking like Goldie Hawn long past it being age-apprpriate as a result, lol!

Conform, conform - he will thank you for it

bossykate · 08/09/2008 14:20

as long as you don't get huffy with people if they mistake him for a girl!

OrmIrian · 08/09/2008 14:21

Yes I have a girl as well as 2 boys. They all have 'girly' hair and boyish clothes. DS#1 won't have his hair cut and DD won't wear pink/frills/sparkly.

IndigoMoon · 08/09/2008 14:21

we cut ds hair short and i did not like it, i am growing it longer now - much cuter!

Original poster
mummy5bellies · 08/09/2008 14:23

No, never get huffy when it happens

OP posts:
MrsMattie · 08/09/2008 14:23

Nobody has ever teased my son for having long curly hair. Mind you, it's a laid back, mixed area of London - lots of big Afros, different types of braids, dreadlockls, a good few 'In The Naaaaaavy' crewcuts and loads of little boys with long, blonde angelic hair . Short back and sides as the only hair cut for boys - surely that went out in the 1950s?