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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... to hate people that bring their own food to parties?

189 replies

trumpetgirl · 07/09/2008 18:18

My dd has been to a few parties recently and I have noticed that some people have brought food for their children and I assumed that their child must have allergies or something.
I have just found out that actually they just don't want their child eating the crap party food.
Should I feel offended by this? Are they implying that I'm a terrible mother for letting my dd eat crisps and cake for her tea? If not, then why do they have a problem letting their kid eat it?
It's a one off, a treat. What's the flipping problem with that?!

OP posts:
MrsMattie · 08/09/2008 11:52

Only just seen this thread and haven't waded through all replies.

These people are wankers.

Gateau · 08/09/2008 12:09

Sounds reasonable MadameCasta

kiddiz · 08/09/2008 12:14

my cat is currently asleep in the sun (remember that round glowing thing in the sky last seen about 2 months ago!) on my dining table. I promise to dettox it before lunch!

lingle · 08/09/2008 12:21

at MadameCastafiore.

do you at least pretend that your kids are allergic to the cats?

nappyaddict · 08/09/2008 12:25

trumpetgirl - did you have healthy alternatives aswell? when doing a party i always do a mixture of crap and healthy stuff so the parents that don't want their kids to have crap can still eat. if you didn't then you shouldn't be offended.

MadameCastafiore · 08/09/2008 12:26

No I just take my own food - I have stopped visiting some people though or sometimes just take water and make sure the kids have been fed before we go.

Ebb · 08/09/2008 12:31

I think it's rude to take your own food to a party unless you have an allergy / intolerance. However I took one charge to a party (they were 5) and all they served the children were sprinkle sandwiches (white bread buttered and topped with 100's and 1000's) and birthday cake! I had to take him home and feed the poor child as he was completely grossed out by the food and he loves crap!

pagwatch · 08/09/2008 12:36

I find this all pretty hard to believe actually.
Can't help wondering ifthere was some miscommunication along the way...
like my DS who has no true allergies but has huge probelsm with wheat/dairy and additives making his ASD much much worse. Maybe children in question have to avoid additives but parents are reluctant to shout about ADHD or some such.

10 years of party attendence withthree kids at at least five different schools and i have never even heard of this happening let alone seen it.

Karathraceandherspecialdestiny · 08/09/2008 12:50

I wouldn't care if a parent brought their own food to my dd's party. As one earlier poster said, you can provide party food without it being complete crap. I did v good quality sausages cut into cocktail sausage size, a few vegetable crudites for decoration knowing they wouldn't get eaten (they didn't), free-range egg sandwiches and potato wedges. But NO crisps (cos that's what the kids always want to fill up on) or jam sandwiches or shop-bought crap with additives. I also handed about innocent smoothies for the drinks but there was only 6 of them so it didn't break the bank.

nooname · 08/09/2008 12:51

My nephew's friend always has to eat his own horrid little box of veg sticks etc at a party while all the other kids eat party food

In his case it is absolutely because his parents (partic father) are totally controlling and not because he has any food intolerances/dislikes (known for a fact as when he stays over at nephews he covets his choc and sweets and tries to steal them as he isn't allowed them at home )

I witnessed this at nephews bday parties before having my own kids and vowed I would never do this. It's definitely more harmful for kids to be denied fitting in and being normal, along with being denied treats every now and then, than it is to be allowed to eat crap at parties.

It can be a bit painful to witness your child eating all manner of horrible chemicals and fats but imo it is being the better parent to put that aside and let them be like everyone else.

KVC · 08/09/2008 13:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

DaphneMoon · 08/09/2008 13:27

I just cannot be doing with this bloody attitude to food sometimes. I fully appreciate that certain children have food allergies etc, but to not let your kids eat party food because it is bad for them is crazy. FGS let them have a life, they don't go to parties every day, it does not kill them to have a few e numbers and crappy food once in a while. Parents years ago didn't worry so much about it why are we? Unless your child has an allergy I would be deeply saddened by a person who took their own food. Even more so by anyone only letting them have water and feeding them beforehand - hope you were joking!

They WILL EAT CRAP food when they are older anyway!

TheDuchessOfNork · 08/09/2008 13:28

It's affectation. Ignore them and drop from future parties.

This happened at a party we gave a few years ago - even though I buy nice ham from twatrose.

nappyaddict · 08/09/2008 13:39

my cousin is very sensitive to e numbers and sweeteners. his behaviour goes through the roof if he has them so he can't.

spinspinsugar · 08/09/2008 13:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsMattie · 08/09/2008 13:42

Imagine being the only child at a party who's mum / dad wouldn't let you have sausage roll/fairy cake etc? Who's mum/dad sat there with a specially made packed lunch eyeing you maniacally in case you dared to nick a malteser.

These people are freaks. Rude freaks.

Poor kids.

ScottishMummy · 08/09/2008 13:48

mum's beady eyes drilling into your back in case you had some sausage roll/ginger/wotsits
as she hisses "step back from the cake and hydrogenated fats"

nice

genuinely i think it is wrong to be so controlling about food esp in a social situation

pick your battles, party food not worth stressing about imo

Flibbertyjibbet · 08/09/2008 14:00

Didn't Jools Oliver say in a published interview last week that she takes food for her children if they go to a party?

Even if the food came from the kitchen of Jamie Oliver, if a mum turned up with separate food for their own children at a party, I would think them indescribably rude.

Some parties we go to its crap, some its healthly. But its free food that the other parents have gone to the time and trouble to provide. So my boys can scoff as much as they like.

ScottishMummy · 08/09/2008 14:08

i always think of jools as a bit unhinged.too much high expressed emotion.she is anal about everything else so aye why not food

free food
nada
hee haw

cannot comprehend knocking back a freebie

just for fun ach let the weans get stuck in,hae fun an 'aw

KVC · 08/09/2008 14:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Flibbertyjibbet · 08/09/2008 14:13

I am always that mum who volunteers to help tidy up.

ScottishMummy · 08/09/2008 14:18

the FaddyFoody north london mums grilled (lol) my friend about the do at her party.need to find out whether any brought own food, but certainly the wanted to know source of food,organic etc

hoo hum

some folk cant see the wood for the trees for the leaves

MrsMattie · 08/09/2008 14:21

Oh FFS! LMAO@ScottishMummy
People who care if party food is organic? Numpties.

bossykate · 08/09/2008 14:23

i think of late "food" has become a stall for the aspirational to set out their middle class credentials.

sprogger · 08/09/2008 14:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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