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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be fed up for my DS to have to wait & shiver to use the showers after swimming whilst Mums of girls wash & condition their childs long hair ?

131 replies

CaptainUnderpants · 04/09/2008 18:44

Arghhhhh ! Really bugged me the other day . This is in the family changing area , why cant they use the ladies changing room if they only have girls .

My boys come out of their swimming lesson and have to wait whilst the showers are being hogged by these women !

My eldest Ds will now use the mens changing room so he doesn't freeze when getting out of the pool but my youngest will just have to wait !

Rant over - do I need a hard hat ?

OP posts:
nocluemum · 05/09/2008 18:17

omg - who would wash their kids hair after swimming! would you do it on holiday after they had been swimming in the sea - i dont think so. take them home and wash it in the bath that night. plus public swimmong pool changing rooms are so grim just get out asap - i would take ds home in his swimmers if it werent so cold!

Takver · 05/09/2008 18:18

Luckily there are loads of showers at our pool so I've never seen anyone waiting - but I have to confess to conditioning dd's hair. If I don't wash & put on conditioner it is dry by the time we get home, and it takes at least 15 mins of tears and screaming to get the tangles out. I threaten regularly to get it all cut off, but then she would be the only girl in her class to have short hair, and I just know she would (a) be mortified, and (b) probably be picked on because of it.
I have super short hair now following a lot of misery & tears as a child having tangles combed out, so I sympathise with her . . . We have tried wash&go all in one, but it doesn't do the trick

bloomingfedup · 05/09/2008 18:19

As i said before, we don't do it BUT what's the big deal? Go home and shower.

Takver · 05/09/2008 18:23

nocluemum I think it is the chlorine that causes the tangles, seaside swimming is not so bad. I first got my hair cut short when I was a teenager & doing loads of swimming for just that reason. I suspect it depends on what your hair is like, I think DD & I have bad genes on the hair front . . .
Mind you, it doesn't take us more than about 2 mins max to get it sorted out - I have an evening class the same night, so I'm well practiced at getting the little darlings out, showered/hair washed, dressed & in the car in no more than 5 minutes, otherwise I don't have time for tea!

believeintheboogie · 05/09/2008 18:25

nocluemum, im not washing her hair because she has been swimming, im washing it because I wont have time after swimming as her lesson is late and dd has the ability to glue everything in to her hair without trying, as I said though I actually put a towel on dd and let those who arent shampooing go first and I dont condition it or brush it in the shower/cubicle.
If I tried to do it afterwards it would be stupid oclock by the time dd was in bed.

floaty · 05/09/2008 18:39

II can't elieve that anyone thinks that it iis reasonable for one cild to occupy a public shower built for the convenience of everyone for as long as 6 minutes ...I am horrifiesd there is no way I would allow my children to be so selfish,everyone should be allowed to use the shower to rinse off chlorine nothing else,at our pool shampoos and conditioners are banned

believeintheboogie · 05/09/2008 18:47

floaty i do agree that 6 minutes is a ridiculas amount of time, I suppose im lucky that dd does her lessons at a private gym and there are 20 showers and its a nice environment but even so its in shampoo rinse out, 2 minutes at the very most.

handlemecarefully · 05/09/2008 18:47

My dd has collar length hair but it knots terribly without conditioner - one big bird's nesty tangle which is then quite painful to comb and tame. It's because it is fine hair, nothing to do with it's length.

I don't know if long hair needs conditioning (since neither my or my dd's hair is long) - but perhaps all girls should be sent to the barbers for a number 1?

I will continue to condition my dd's hair after swimming, and don't give a rats arse if a jilly no life someone gets their knickers in a twist over it. The whole process only takes me about 3 minutes anyway.

handlemecarefully · 05/09/2008 18:48

I actually wanted to be ruder than that but restrained myself

handlemecarefully · 05/09/2008 18:54

Incidentally I don't bother showering ds if there is a queue....and I don't get off on getting myself all stirred up into a frenzy because the other cubicles are taken, or let him stand there freezing whilst I huff and puff for England.

He doesn't need his hair conditioning, it doesn't knot (it's that number 1 haircut again, really must consider that for dd) and a shower to remove chlorine is in his case (normal skin), superfluous

RustyBear · 05/09/2008 19:02

36 children taking 3 minutes each in 4 showers (based on bozza's statistics) means the whole thing takes 27 minutes - that's quite a long time for the last ones in the queue to wait.

handlemecarefully · 05/09/2008 19:06

What should we allocate then 21 seconds (fgs)

believeintheboogie · 05/09/2008 19:08

ahh there is only 6 people in my dds swimming group and 4 in the other and 20 showers in the shower room so I can see why it isnt an issue for us.

TheFallenMadonna · 05/09/2008 19:09

Blimey. I condition my hair (and dd's) after I get out of the pool. Now I shall be aware of all the beady eyes on me. And it will probably distract me and make me take even longer...

In fact, how about a conditioning hair mask

handlemecarefully · 05/09/2008 19:12

TheFallenM - mind you don't take too long in the loo either. Perhaps just one piece of loo roll, and don't bother to flush?

This thread is symptomatic of how intolerant society has become imo. Obviously if there is a queue for the shower people shouldn't take piss takingly long over it, but a few minutes? - sheesh [despairs]

Heifer · 05/09/2008 19:13

Well have to admit that I often shampoo/condition (in 1) my DD hair after swimming lessons at the local school....

I didn't used to do it, but saw so many of the others do it and thought my that is a good idea, saves me doing it later (or early next morning)...

It doesn't take long though really does it.... I do hurry DD along though and end up often getting wet myself whilst trying to get the shampoo out of her hair, whilst telling her for the 10th time to lift her head up...

Next time you are stood waiting in the queue for a shower, remind yourself that whilst you may be wasting 3 mins of your time, I am saving around 15 mins of my time (my DD likes to stay for ages in our shower at home and then would have to get dried, dressed AGAIN)...

RustyBear · 05/09/2008 19:15

Well, like all statistics, they can be twisted presented in many ways - not all the 36 will have long hair, some will be in families that go in together etc.
It's a long time since my two did swimming lessons, but I seem to remember they just squashed in together with a group of friends from the lesson.

DD doesn't go to the pool much nowadays, probably because she wouldn't be allowed to take her GHDs and spend half an hour hogging the changing room while she straightened her hair....

floaty · 05/09/2008 19:21

Its not an example of the intolerance of people waiting it, is a lack of consideration by the people hogging the facilities ,when I was at school you got one minute and then the next person was in.My two eldest I always showered at home ,ds3 i do shower if possible because the quicker we get the chlorine off his skin the less his eczema itches.

I really don't see why the family showers should be for girls only though .I had very long wavy hair as a child,my mother never conditioned it ,for swimming it was tightly plaited and I wore a cap which I kept on until dressed!

handlemecarefully · 05/09/2008 19:27

Right back at you - I think it is intolerant of precious mums of boys (thank God I have both sexes - makes for more grounded and informed perspective...) who don't have a child with fine hair that tangles and knots impossibly every time it gets wet, to get hormonal about other mums conditioning their child's untameable hair.

Original poster
CaptainUnderpants · 05/09/2008 19:52

just wondering who is getting hormonal about all this handmecarefully !

It was a rant - but as always in Mnset it starts getting heated .

I think that alot of people agree that is is inconsiderate and alot of pople have come up with alternatives . No need to get too heated about it all .

OP posts:
MilaMae · 05/09/2008 20:14

Captain am totally with you am wondering if we go to the same pool the ratio of showers sounds very similar.

I take my kids to swimming lessons and pay a fortune for the pleasure, they are 4,4 and 3. I have twin boys (1 with exzema) and 1 girl with very long curly hair.

I can't even get near the showers after lessons with my 3 thanks to the preciousness of some parents so just take them home along with the majority of other parents. They have tea then hair wash bath and bed. My son should really be showering straight away due to his exzema but if I'm honest it doesn't really harm him. I'm sorry but girls do not need to wash their hair immediately if my 3 year old and her long hair can wait anybody can.

Personally I think there should be somebody from the pool standing by the shower letting them all have 5 mins sluice off and that's your lot. The amount I pay I feel all of my 3 are entitled to have a quick go in the shower. Yes I could wrap them in a towel and wait but the queue would be out into the pool if we all did whilst waiting for the 2 or 3 who hog the shower. We all just give up and go home.

So no I don't think you are being unreasonable

bozza · 05/09/2008 20:29

Actually the 36 children is only if they are all there at our baths (3 classes going on at the same time) which is pretty unusual. And if they all use the ladies which is also unlikely. More in ladies though usually as more Mums take them.

I do ration DS. He is allowed 3 pushes of the button. This was after a let him go into the men's on his own and DD and I were waiting outside for 40 minutes and people from the subsequent lesson were leaving before I sent a pool attendant in to hurry him along. So then I relegated him back to the ladies'.

TeacherSaysSo · 05/09/2008 20:47

YABU

Its a public facility, first come first served. If you agree showers should be used to wash off the chlorine then shampoo and soap are needed, cos water does sod all. Either shower properly and take the time or don't bother surely!

p.s. don't YOU wash your hair after a swim?

SlartyBartFast · 05/09/2008 20:54

swimming hats is definitely the answer

SlartyBartFast · 05/09/2008 20:55

actually i dont think any body is going to have their mind changed on here by reading the posts, unfortunately. i can only hope my dds dont get stuck behind those conditioning and combing through!!

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