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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be fuming that dd was not allowed a lollipop at nursey?

97 replies

mummytoasweetypie · 03/09/2008 18:20

My dd goes to a private nursery 2 days per week and has for almost 3 yrs. Recently she has taken a few sweets in her snack box to share with her friend. they have came home with her and she told me she wasn't allowed them at nursery. I was never given an adequate explanation for this. today she took in a lollipop for herself and my friends dd. I made clear to the manager/owner and keyworker that they were for after lunch and teeth had to be brushed afterwards. No problems I was told. Then when I collected dd she told me she still had her lolly and was told to have it in the car on the way home I'm really cross about this.

I've discussed with the nursery healthy eating before. My dd has a very healthy diet with the occasional lollipop. I think it is my business what she has unless they are concerned she has an inadequate diet and they should speak to me about it if they do. I pay them a lot of money to look after my daughter and I expect them to discuss issues with me not rely on a preschooler to give me information.

I've written a letter of complaint but not sure whether to send it as it may be too strong but I'm just fed up by the fact they made out it was ok to me then refused to let dd have her lolly.

OP posts:
lulumama · 03/09/2008 18:22

but you could brush her teeth at home, when you got in, if she had it in the car??

YABU

if you feel that strongly about teeth brushing after sweets, tehn don't give her sweets for nursery, if she is only there 2 dyas, she can have sweets the five days she is not there, adn you can supervise teeth brushing

why take in a lollipop for her and a friend anyway? surely the other children would have been upset hence, they gave it at home time.

if the rest of the time they give good care and your DD is happy, i would rip up the letter and relax a bit.

ALMummy · 03/09/2008 18:23

Hmmm, yes, I would love to be working in a nursery where one kid comes in with a lollipop. Of course there is not going to be absolute bedlam with all the others wanting one as well is there?

TheFallenMadonna · 03/09/2008 18:24

Seriously?

I forsee some threads when she starts school...

BoysAreLikeDogs · 03/09/2008 18:25

interesting first post ya loon

MarmadukeScarlet · 03/09/2008 18:26

So your DD told you she wasn't allowed sweets at nursery and you still sent more in with her? You are fuming about it?

I think you need to get a little perspective.

FabioFlangeCat · 03/09/2008 18:27

Don't brush teeth immediately after sweets.
Wait half an hour.

Boyswillbeboys · 03/09/2008 18:27

It's always quite hard to get the full story from a small child - maybe she forgot to have it, then it was end of lunch time so the nursery teacher told her to save it for later? I'd ask first before you make a written complaint.

Maybe the nursery staff felt it was unfair to bring something to share just with one other - didn't want anyone else to be upset? At our school you are not allowed to share food.

Medowflowers · 03/09/2008 18:27

Is it due to the choking risk? Did they say?

cthea · 03/09/2008 18:27

Sorry but YABU. The other children would have wanted a lollipop too, unnecessary distress/mayhem.

TheArmadillo · 03/09/2008 18:28

They've made clear before that they don't like sweets, yet you sent them in again

You wanted them to let her eat it and then make her brush her teeth after.

Why just not let her have them after school? Why does she need them there?

Why is this so infuriating you?

KVC · 03/09/2008 18:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

sagacious · 03/09/2008 18:29

lollypops are banned at ds's primary

Reason being if they are sucking a lollypop and they fall it can really cause damage (I have a friend who is a A and E doctor and it really does happen)

Give it to her when shes at home.

CapricaSix · 03/09/2008 18:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore · 03/09/2008 18:30

its not because of healthy eating no sweets rule is to avoid jealousy and accidents from dc's who may be lactose intolerant have a nut allergy or diabetic

what if you dd let her seriously diabetic friend have a lick of her lollipop?

plus like almummy said there would be hell one with other kids wanting to know where their lolly is.

my dd1 brought in a birthday cake on her birthday to her private nursery, i had checked with the manager first and she yes but it must contain absolutely no nuts and i must provide the packaging to the nursery can verify and it must be big enough so that all the dc's in dd1's room could have some

chapstickchick · 03/09/2008 18:33

I understand what youre saying BUT as a nursery nurse ive spent time in private nurseries indeed my friend is an owner of one- in a nursery establishment the key to everything is routine and unfortunately unlike a childminder who can bend to ccomodte differing childrens needs nurseries cant.

There is such an emphasis on healthy eating in all childcare settings that really it goes against the rules of the nursery to give out sweets,also to only include sweets for a few children wouldnt be fair to the other children -you wouldnt like your dd to watch other children eat sweets nd not have herself would you?

the diet in nursery is very 'regimented' with meals and snacks catered for, the activities in each room are not geared around little ones munching on a chuppa chup so although i appreciate you like to give your child the odd sweet treat then thats fine but it isnt acceptable to expect it to happen in nursery.

To be honest and blunt it is not worth falling out with nursery just accept - however irritating you find it that sweets arent allowed in nursery.

Twiglett · 03/09/2008 18:33

IF you're not going to send in enough sweets for every single child who can see your child eating her lollipop then you are so out of order it is unbelievable

and I hope you actually understand why

pagwatch · 03/09/2008 18:34

can anyone really put 'fuming' and 'lolipop' in the same sentence.
Really ?

Seriously?

nah !

Twiglett · 03/09/2008 18:34

brushing teeth immediately after eating sweets is really WRONG .. it will help further damage the enamel.. you need to wait a good 30 mins to an hour before brushing ...

desperatehousewifetoo · 03/09/2008 18:35

Perhaps there are other children there who do not have a healhy diet and they feel that by allowing your dc to have sweets, the other children may be encouraged to bring less healthy food in too.

I also think it is a bit unfair for only some children have sweets and not all of them at that age. Would your dd be upset if others had sweets and not her?

Overmydeadbody · 03/09/2008 18:36

jeeez, are you serious?!

YABU.

The nursery has the right to decide what does and does not get consumed on sight. I wouldn't let two kids suck on lollipops while the others didn't have them if I was running a nursery tbh.

Majeika · 03/09/2008 18:37

FGS!!

You are so unreasonable I cannot reason with it.

Most schools and nurseries are now healthy and to encourage eating sweets at school is wrong - and unfair to the kids who wont get a lolly from SweetyPie's Mummy!

Overmydeadbody · 03/09/2008 18:37

To the op:

Does the world actually revolve around your little sweetypie?

My apologies if it does, obviously yanbu in that case.

pagwatch · 03/09/2008 18:37

perhaps there has been recent attacks by guerilla lolipop ninja warriors anf the nursery are trying to stem the tide of mindless violence?

stop the madness I say

pagwatch · 03/09/2008 18:38

have have have !

Slubberdegullion · 03/09/2008 18:39

This is a wind up surely, or very silly.

I had one of those hard sherbety 2-tone lollypops the other day. It tasted of soap.

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