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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be shocked and dismayed that DS has been invited to a joint party.

421 replies

SparklyDiscoGirl · 03/09/2008 13:23

This party is going to be in a soft-play centre and it is a joint party between 4 of the boys in his class.

AIBU to think that this is a total cop-out on behalf of the parents involved?

DS is friends with all 4 of the boys and so it will be impossible to do anything excpet buy a present each for all 4 boys.

The parents who are planning this party clearly realise that this will be the predicament for all of the parents of invited children and yet are going ahead with this ludicrous plan regardless.

AIBU to think this is just taking the whole joint party thing waaay too far?

OP posts:
geekgirl · 03/09/2008 13:33

you need to worry less about the presents

nobody will actually care whether you turn up with presents or not

Fimbo · 03/09/2008 13:34

Agree with NP.

You expect 4 parties for 4 pressies.

nailpolish · 03/09/2008 13:34

yes easy for you but boring and sad for the child

my dds would hate to get money as a gift

morningpaper · 03/09/2008 13:34

a bit hard to spoil 4 children though

I fear that the bar of SPOILING has been raised too high

Hiring out a soft-play centre for a massive social shin-dig to celebrate best friends' birthdays at the age of 4 is obviously not enough SPOILING these days?????

Mamabea · 03/09/2008 13:34

I think 'shocked and dismayed' is a bit OTT.

Perhaps they did it to save on expense? Parties can be costly if you are all guns for hiring out a place...I don't think it's ludicrous.

If spending money on 4 pressie's at once is an issue (which it would be for me- v tight budget) then simply set a limit for the amount you are prepared to spend on each.

After all it's not about the presents it's about the kids having fun.

Maybe the parents have that attitude (i.e. not worried about who gets what rubbish presents) and so don't consider their plan to be putting others in such 'a predicament.'

chill

and get yourself through it with a smile and lots of coffee.

FluffyMummy123 · 03/09/2008 13:34

Message withdrawn

brimfull · 03/09/2008 13:34

sounds good to me
three weekends saved from parties

mrsruffallo · 03/09/2008 13:34

I thought OP meant joint as in herb party too.
I was imaging all these middle aged men with a joint from each continent on a tray and discussing the merits of each.

traceybath · 03/09/2008 13:35

i did joint party this year for my DS and his friend. Their birthdays are 2 days apart and they're in the same class.

All school friends bought pressies for both but the out of school friends just bought a pressie for the child they knew and gave a card to the other child.

Have i committed a faux pas by doing a joint party?? Should add it was their 4th party and we invited their whole class from pre-school.

ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe · 03/09/2008 13:36

My DD was invited to a joint party last year for three boys in her class. The mums requested that all parents bought one present (if they wished) and they would be shared about amongst the 3 boys. Much more sensible.

morningpaper · 03/09/2008 13:36

MP's guide to presents for children:

BOYS: Marbles (49p)
GIRLS: Marbles (49p)

Actually Asda are selling off their cheerleader's pom poms for 49p this week I note

nailpolish · 03/09/2008 13:36

having a joint party is fun for chidren
thye dont give a shit actually, they jsut want to eat and run about

its the parents who et them selves in a stupid tizz

IllegallyBrunette · 03/09/2008 13:36

I wanted to do a joint party for Dd2 and Ds this year, but dd2 is having non of it.

mrsruffallo · 03/09/2008 13:36

I think if you don't bring a present then you can't have a party bag

junkcollector · 03/09/2008 13:37

Look on the bright side. You only have to go to 1 party this month instead of 4. I HATE children's parties.

gladders · 03/09/2008 13:37

think it's an excellent idea - all ds's class (23 of them....) have autumn term birthdays (don't ask...) - so if there aren't LOTS of joint parties planned, we're all in trouble.

now if we could have just one party that would be great... (and don't worry avenalife, am sure we would stretch to a cake per child.....)

LadySanders · 03/09/2008 13:37

money is boring and sad? someone tell that to my ds1 who gleefully rubs his hands when he gets any, and hoards it all in various containers in his bedroom

LadySanders · 03/09/2008 13:37

very handy whenever we have a chinese takeaway and run out of £1 coins

mrsruffallo · 03/09/2008 13:38

Marbles? That's a bit stingy
I'd rather nothing at all

FluffyMummy123 · 03/09/2008 13:38

Message withdrawn

morningpaper · 03/09/2008 13:39

don't I get a party bag if I bring marbles?

I went to a party in Brewster's Fayre soft play last week and it was BRILL btw - lots of surprisingly balanced food AND all the adults drank beer

nailpolish · 03/09/2008 13:39

yes money is boring

to my dds anyway

Ledodgy · 03/09/2008 13:39

I would think in the past they have probably found that their Parties clash so not everyone turns up etc and they thought this was the answer to that problem. Not unreasonable as far as I can see.

morningpaper · 03/09/2008 13:39

It's impossible to have too many marbles

bythepowerofgreyskull · 03/09/2008 13:39

we have a few children in DS1's class who have their birthdays within 2 days of each other,
the choice they have is having a joint party or having separate parties on the same weekend and only half the friends being able to go.

no problem IMO a great time had by all.
get on to the book people .co.uk and bulk buy books

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