To be shocked and dismayed that DS has been invited to a joint party.

[SparklyDiscoGirl]

This party is going to be in a soft-play centre and it is a joint party between 4 of the boys in his class.

AIBU to think that this is a total cop-out on behalf of the parents involved?

DS is friends with all 4 of the boys and so it will be impossible to do anything excpet buy a present each for all 4 boys.

The parents who are planning this party clearly realise that this will be the predicament for all of the parents of invited children and yet are going ahead with this ludicrous plan regardless.

AIBU to think this is just taking the whole joint party thing waaay too far?

Plus why would you want your 4 year old to share the lime light at their party ?? I would want all the focus on my DD, hence I would not do a joint party. It is not solely about the cost, but I have experienced "deep pockets" before, and it can be so annoying and unfair on the DC's.

Well as a parent I'm not remotely fussed about the value of the gifts so if someone bought a £1 colouring book for each of the 4 children that would be fine. So there is no need for it to cost a lot of money for gifts.

As someone said further down, pound shops are fantastic for party presents.

Share hte limelight?! Oh FFS.

Hmmm....actually maybe you are right re: the £1 book presents.

I just can't help feeling like a bit of a tight arse to give presents like that.

Yes, share het? limelight...that day is special and does not remain special once you get older, so lets make a fuss of our little ones while we can....god, shoot me down with a gun from the pound shop !!

A supersoaker mppaw?

I just can't see the problem.

'such pressure' what to buy 4 presents?

Best you don't let your LO go.

Tightarse sparkly....

SDG - if I came to a party hosted by you, and gave your ds a £1 book as a present, would you think I were a tightarse?

If not, then why on earth do you think you might come across as one?

And if so, please don't invite me or my sons to any parties.

the OP is baffling.parties are supposed to be fun,why so angst.emotive words, hand ringing.unclench let your boy go

had he gone 4 parties he would have bought 4 presents

actually think parents splitting cost of venue etc is quite canny. not ludicrous in the least

this has been blown out of all proportion, made to sound sinister and underhand when it isnt

it is a party - enjoy

Yes, you are right. If someone bought a £1 book for my ds I would not think anything of it at all so why I think I might be judged for it I don't know.

For some reason, I suppose I still just don't want to be the £1 book person.

£1 book bargaintastic.i would think - thanks.wouldn't judge on value of gift.attending is nice too

I think you're too hard on yourself, SDG...

I say go for £1 books - and start a whole new craze amongst the £10 mummies!

pound shops are fabby, cant really go wrong at that price.i have bought smashing stuff for partybags

Next question, how many children have been invited? If it's a whole class shinding then I think the parents are very wise.

Also is this a nursery class or a reception class? Again if it is a nursery class I think it's a good way to go because at this point none of the children/parents will know each other.

I still think you have got off lightly soft play with a whole bunch of four year olds. My idea of hell!

I wouldn't do the one pound books, because I would worry that they were crap books (I am very snobbish about books though) but if you go to Waterstone's you will usually find three for two offers, then you can buy your ds some nice new books and get the party ones at a reduced price. But then I'm always looking for an excuse to go to the bookshop...

I don't expect any parent to pay £10 for a gift for my dc birthday - it's a token so a few pounds worth is perfectly adequate and I wouldn't bat an eyelid if it was 'just' a colouring book.

Sparkly, you buy a set like this from the Book People - £10 for £52 of books - so they actually cost you less than £1 each, but the cover price is £3.99 each, so you don't look cheap!

Job done

I keep reading the phrase 'shocked and dismayed' and thinking 'What? it's a kids' party for goodness sake. Get some perspective here'

OP has conceded that shocked and dismayed was overstating the case a bit

OK, sorry.