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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To stay in bed for a lot of the day (am pregnant) while DH does DIY and looks after our kids?

171 replies

highschoolmusical · 30/08/2008 15:20

I am so tired.

OP posts:
FluffyMummy123 · 30/08/2008 18:58

Message withdrawn

cheekymonk · 30/08/2008 18:59

No problem hsm. I just got annoyed at people trying to make you feel bad when you weren't doing anything wrong. It was reassurance you wanted, not judgement! x

iCod · 30/08/2008 19:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
highschoolmusical · 30/08/2008 19:02

Cod

OP posts:
FluffyMummy123 · 30/08/2008 19:04

Message withdrawn

Original poster
highschoolmusical · 30/08/2008 19:06

cod

OP posts:
QuintessentialShadow · 30/08/2008 19:09

Why make a point about wanting to stay in bed? Do so if you need to, no big deal. Dont see what unreasonable has to do with it, unless you are just plain lazy of course.

I find myself agreeing with Cod, must be the medication, supposed to loosen phlegm, maybe it is affecting braincells, too.....

Niceychops · 30/08/2008 21:01

cod

you are being a bit of a fuckface

hollyandnoah · 31/08/2008 15:03

I find myself agreeing with niceychops.

If you're tiered and feeling run down, nothing wrong with staying in bed!

KerryMum · 31/08/2008 15:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
highschoolmusical · 31/08/2008 16:01

I have been feeling better today so have been out with my DC but now have splitting headache - so am in bed. DH has just bought me up a cuppa and a choclate!

Cod - have whole heartedly agree with Niceychops.

OP posts:
lou031205 · 31/08/2008 16:19

No, I agree with Cod on this one. You witheld info then rolled it out when it suited you. YABU to feel unsupported.

Niceychops · 31/08/2008 16:23

witheld information???

It's an internet chat forum, not the Hague!

Original poster
highschoolmusical · 31/08/2008 16:24

TBH, Thats unfair as I was asking what people thought about me a pG lady going to bed while DH looked after kids nd did DIY. I would have expected support anyway without the other curcumstances which came up in convo.

If I was asked the same question. i would say no NU - go to bed and enjoy - you are after all pregnant and tired.

OP posts:
Original poster
highschoolmusical · 31/08/2008 16:26

And cod wants to wash that gob out with soap - 'silly bint' - only someone who is uses this type of language.

OP posts:
lilymolly · 31/08/2008 16:28

Oh god not another bun fight

I am 11+4 weeks and like you totally knackered and feel sick.

At about 2pm I have this wave of exhaustion and have a nap whilst dd naps.

I feel guilty, esp when dp has been working extremely hard all week getting up at 6am and installing central heating.

He lets me nap, but not sure he would let me lie in bed all day. He did a few weeks ago as I had hyperemesis and was very ill, but the exhaustion thing is a bit diff I think anyway.

Hey if its ok with your family then enjoy and out your feet up

Niceychops · 31/08/2008 16:30

HSM, agree, put your feet up. I did.

Cod, shut up and be nice.

onepieceoflollipop · 31/08/2008 16:33

Highschoolmusical. Sorry to hear you are so exhausted and also that you have lost four pregnancies.

Obviously it is your choice which topics you post (or not) in... However, AIBU is often the setting for people being sarcastic/jokey as the subject matter is often lighthearted.

Personally in your situation I would probably have chosen to post in pregnancy, and also put slighter more info in my op. I'm not saying that you should have done, just that is what I would have done.

I think then you may have got more understanding and support.

If you read back through your initial posts, complete with I think people thought you were being jokey and responded accordingly.

Original poster
highschoolmusical · 31/08/2008 16:34

LM,

I don't feel guilty, My Dh also works very hard but then so do I (looking after my 2 DC) and I am pregnant. Its not a case of DH letting me - he is happy to let me go with how I ma feeling. I'm not going to martyr myself. TBH once the baby comes - I won't have any time for myself - so might as well enjoy.

OP posts:
lilymolly · 31/08/2008 16:36

Oh totally agree HSM!

Beleive me was not having a go at all- just that I would feel guilty cos I am bloody stupid

I am sure you work very hard as does your dp

Enjoy your rest

Must be due about 17th March like me eh?

mother2two · 31/08/2008 16:38

You are not being unreasonable.

It ALWAYS astounds me at what pregnant women are expected to do and at what some pregnant women do!

Just on reading the replies, I have to say, my Lord, there are sometimes very insentive individuals on mumsnet.

I agree with onepieceoflollipop; you will probably be better off posting in "pregnancy" thread.

Original poster
highschoolmusical · 31/08/2008 16:39

LM

Sorry, am feeling a bit 'got at' after some of the replies.

Hope you start feeling better soon.

OP posts:
Original poster
highschoolmusical · 31/08/2008 16:41

Thanks Motherof2 and Lolli,

I will post in preg next time! I do wish that I wa sone of these PG ladies who 'sailed' through, am not.

OP posts:
lou031205 · 31/08/2008 16:50

HSM - I don't disagree with you staying in bed at all. I merely think that your original post made it sound as if you were being lazy, when actually you haven't been feeling well and have had previous losses. If that was put in your OP, you would have had different replies.

pointydog · 31/08/2008 16:53

I'd hate staying in bed for most of the day. I suppose if you're ahppy to do that and dh ishappy to do everything else, fine.