Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think people should respect my wishes on my wedding day

291 replies

Perfectinpink · 28/07/2008 10:56

I am getting married at the end of August, everything is sorted, all going well (Miraculously). Except for one thing. On the wedding invitations, I asked people to come dressed in pink - or at least with pink touches. Pink is my favourite colour and my lovely fiance has agreed to wear a grey suit with gorgeous pink waistcoat and tie.
My dress is, obviously pink, bridesmaids are in pink, the flowers will be pink, the decorations are pink - that is the colour scheme.

Well, everyone rsvp'd but now it appears some of my friends and family are rebelling. My best friend has shown me her outfit and it is not pink. Or even purple, red, magenta, vermillion or puce! It is green. I have asked her if she couldn't get a jacket with pink in it and a hat but she refuses. It will look bloody horrible in the wedding photos.
She has got very shirty with me and has told me that apparently several other friends are ignoring the pink theme. And now my sister has said her dh is refusing to wear anything remotely pink (not even a tie with some pink in it)
It's my wedding, it's at a lovely expensive venue, I am paying for them to have a marvellous day, plenty of (pink) champagne and lovely food (all of it with a pink flavour!) and they are going to ruin everything if they persist in ignoring my request. I just want it to be perfect.
What should I do? I've even thought anbout making pink sashes for the rebels to wear but time is running out and I am running out of patience (and money).

OP posts:
AbbeyA · 28/07/2008 15:02

I would adhere to a sensible dress code, it is only polite, but I wouldn't go in for sheer lunacy just because the bride wants a barbie doll wedding!

crokky · 28/07/2008 15:03

I am a total tomboy, live in dark tracksuits etc, had a cheapy register office wedding (in our work suits!).

However, if I was attending your wedding, I'd wear something pink for you. I don't really see the problem with it. Although I do seem to be in the minority .

TheMagnificent7 · 28/07/2008 15:03

Well I'm thinking...

Turniphead1 · 28/07/2008 15:04

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

nooka · 28/07/2008 15:05

The only specific dress (as opposed to black tie etc) invitation I have ever received was for my step-nieces funeral, where her mother asked everyone not to wear black, but blue as it was my niece's favorite colour. Everyone did their best, and I know her mum was very appreciative.

If you are having a fancy dress party, fair enough, but for a wedding it just shows that your priorities have gone wildly wrong IMO. Chances are many of those invited feel uncomfortable not just about your dictac, but also about the whole "perfect theme" weddings are about your marriage, not the party afterwards.

AbbeyA · 28/07/2008 15:06

I am sure we would all like a laugh look, weeonion.

TheMagnificent7 · 28/07/2008 15:07

Yes you are crokky. The OP is thcweaming and thcweaming and thwceamiing and she's going to be sick.

The point is, and especially as you've highlighted it, it's all about the marriage, not the costume. Doesn't matter if it was Westminster Abbey or Croydon Town Hall, as long as you mean the vows.

weeonion · 28/07/2008 15:18

ok - off to see if other SIL has any pics of the day! we didnt actually get any official ones given to us - as we broke the code! all our own ones are the usual japery!

geordieminx · 28/07/2008 15:21

My parents have been invited to a wedding - strictly black tie and ball gowns... the grooms gran is 95.... ponces.

rookiemater · 28/07/2008 15:29

YABU. We had our wedding in Scotland where we live. We encouraged male guests to wear kilts, but we did not force them. DHs brother, who was an usher, was the only one of the blokes in the main bridal party who didn't wear a kilt. Looked bloody stupid in the photos. But he is a skinny man who is self conscious and on a low budget, but too proud to allow us to pay for his kilt hire.
I would never in a million years have insisted that he wear something that he felt uncomfortable in.

I love going to other peoples weddings, I even have a pink dress so if you are short of attendees.... However its an expensive business what with the travel,the present and the overnight accomodation and money for hotel drinks, expecting people to dress to suit your tastes is silly and selfish

Turniphead1 · 28/07/2008 15:32

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

WideWebWitch · 28/07/2008 15:38

This has GOT to be a wind up
if not I'm with cod

weeonion · 28/07/2008 15:45

where is op by the way???

BouncingTurtle · 28/07/2008 15:47

here?

weeonion · 28/07/2008 15:53

thanks buncing turtle - her wedding rehearsal photo looks lovely! i think the vicar could do with a drop of optrex though and doesnt teh flower girl loook sweet with that lilac hair!

TheMagnificent7 · 28/07/2008 16:23

I love wedding rehearsals. Do you have a practice divorce near the end of the evening ? Everyone divies up the pudding, then fights over custody of the mints ?

reethi96 · 28/07/2008 16:25

Please tell me this is not for real.

I weep for the future if it is!

motherinferior · 28/07/2008 16:27

No, no, please oh please tell me it is. Please.

I think perhaps I will, after all, take up Mr Inferior's offers to serve a term of matrimony with him. And enforce a code of gorilla suits. And tutus.

reethi96 · 28/07/2008 16:28

Has to be a troll because any good photographer worth his salt will tell you that pink is the absolute worst colour for photographs!

NotQuiteCockney · 28/07/2008 16:28

Oh, come on MI, you know you want a nekkid wedding. Don't wimp out and go for tutus and gorilla suits.

motherinferior · 28/07/2008 16:28

Nekkid with tutus, perchance?

AbbeyA · 28/07/2008 16:29

I think that there will be a swing the other way soon and people will opt for a simple do.
It is expensive enough being a guest without having clothing dictated.

BouncingTurtle · 28/07/2008 16:30

If you are wearing tutus you won't be nekkid!!

I have to admit the pink themed food made me go and

motherinferior · 28/07/2008 16:31

Tutu skirts.

No, I think gorillas are the way to go.

Blandmum · 28/07/2008 16:32

Designer Gorilla suits?