Was told off nastily for being 'patronising' at a BBQ tonight - sorry long and rambling

[BoysAreLikeDogs]

because I gave my stock explaination of the musical intrument that I play viz 'a cornet, resembles a small trumpet'.

I have never met this woman before, she is a new neighbour of our friends, so was involving her and her DH in the convo only to be told sharply that she knew what a cornet is and not to be 'so bloody patronising'

I use this stock explaination as IME not many people know what a bloody cornet is FGS.

I carried on mingling and handing round the twigletts when I returned to the room she was in she started on at me again for being 'bloody patronising' so I made my apologies to the hosts, gathered up my family and made for the door. Whereupon said guest stopped me in the hallway and said 'off to play our cornet, are we' in such a sarcastic tone that even DP looked askance (he has zero social antennae lol)

I kind of brushed past with my 'social smile' resisiting the urge to take her by the ears and introduce her face to my knee [joke]

So.......... was I being unreasonable to leave party, leaving an awkward and upsetting encounter ?

I intend to ring the hosts in the morning to apolgise for early bath

send her one of these by way of an apology

see i know what a cornet is and i know i know but if someone said cornet to me at a party my first reaction is wtf is that, so for dumbasses people like me, the trumpet thing helps muchly!!

Speaking from personal experience of being asked to stop learning the trumpet, I think she was a complete cow.

well, she's gonna fit in well
the silly c**t
she's actually just ruined any chance of settling there, as she'll always be remembered for this

I don't blame you for explaining, when I used to play the cornet people would say "hehe isn't that an ice cream" fools!

aw Boys that is indeed most shitty and stupid arse woman, what rude and twattish behaviour!

I would have gone uber reasonable and direct and asked her oh so sweetly to explain as I did not know what distress I had caused her... and eyed her with direct 'fuck with me at your peril' stare and smiled the smile that says I am reasonable but I can destroy all that you are with a word Do Not Cross Me.

She is a cock and it is shame she fucked up your party, silly cow.

also matey I sympathise, I have been cornered and ranted at at a party by other guest and it definitely unsettling, horrible. But rightous indignation settles embarrassment I find.

hindsight a wonderful thing

sorry this happened at all. next time keep your calm and in jolly voice say " DO fuck off there's a dear"

"the smile that says I am reasonable but I can destroy all that you are with a word Do Not Cross Me."

--MNHQ, could we PLEASE have that smile as an emoticon.

I think she didn't know what a cornet was at all.

Hence her utter embarrassment.

But you should definitely egg her house.

What a horrible woman - make sure you tell your friend so she never invites her around ever again! And tells all her other neighbours about her. UNless she was rude to others at the party.
If you said that to me I would have replied, ooh yes I know, DH and his DB used to be in a Brass band and they both played the Euphonium and DH's DB was in one of the bands in Brassed Off and my DH played at the Albert Hall in a competition (I think they won as well)!
At which point everyone around us would definitely have expired from boredom
And a Euphonium is like a small tuba

If it had been me, I'd have got her by the throat against the wall, but I am a mentalist prone to the occasional descent of Red Mist.

Seriously, she sounds like a nasty piece of work. There was no excuse WHATSOEVER for her to speak to you like that. Ishoos or no ishoos, I think some people are just plain horrible.

I hope you tell your host exactly why you left.

The woman was obviously a loon.

yy, you definitely need to tell your host.

I hope you never meet this nutjob ever again. If you do, be uber patronising

She's insecure about her intelligence and rude as a result. What a pain.

Could it be her sense of humour? Do you think she thought she was being funny in a provocative, outspoken way and misinterpreted your 'social' smile for a real smile? And assumed you were on her humour wavelenght, so carried on with the joke till you left?

I say this as in my twenties, I used to hang around with a guy (a flatmate, a truly lovely person and one of my best ever friends) who said rude things to people he liked as an act of friendship and affection. So if I met him in a pub he'd bellow out 'hello you miserable bitch' (his nickname for me). He did this to his other friends, too. It got worse when he had had a few drinks. To outsiders it must have seemed very strange!

Definitely tell the hostess anyway, so you can find out if this woman is really awful or not.

She sounds like a knob.
I bet just before you started talking to them that her slightly tipsy husband had said to his friend (slightly too loudly so that she overheard) 'isnt boysarelikedogs absolutely stunning!' and she was jealous

Definitely tell your host why you left early. You did the right thing in calmly leaving. Dont know that I would have been so mature about it.

Oh and please please please print off that pic of a cornet and put it through her letterbox when you go and see your friend.

Take the cornet with you next time.

Present it to her and say "I'm not sure if you understood what one was last time, so I thought I;d bring it and give you a little run down on it,you know how it works....how to clean it, how top play it, I coudl even teach you a short tune on it, You'd like that woudn't you? Shall we start now?"

Then grab her by the hair and drag her outside and beat her to death with it.

Message withdrawn

pmsl LTH

What a nutter
Yanbu

YANBU - not in the least ! she sounds a little unhinged - especially continuing to pursue it ! I know what a cornet is but wouldn't get all huffy if you described it !! I'd just send a note to your friends to say why you had to leave.
I had friends to dinner once - with my new neighbours and my good friend brought along her new boyfriend who proceeded to insult almost everyone in the room - he was hideous - I was very concerned that my new neighbours would think he was 'my' friend too and it'd put them off me- fortunately it didn't but I had him in my house again.

Rub hands eagerly, sit forward as if you can't believe you've got such an exciting case before you and ask in booming voice of genuine enquiry, "Why are you so unpleasant?"

But do post the picture of the cornet through the door - fab idea! Then practise the blank 'what are you talking about you mad-woman' look! Her fate as aggressive nutter of the neighbour sealed