How to handle this

[howbadistheball]

Currently staying at a “naice” hotel in Spain. My bored 15 year old went up to our room to chill for an hour. He’s can’t sit still ( possible ADD, undergoing assessment) and started gently dribbling a ball around the room apparently. It was 1.30 pm.

I was down by the pool ( so don’t actually know how annoying it must have been, but from previous experience it isn’t loud, just a thumping) and came up to check on him. I was accosted by a guest from the room next door, just as I arrived who was very confrontational and annoyed. Apparently it was disturbing his afternoon nap.

I told him I would deal with it, and opened the door to the room. Son and ball are standing there. The guest did not come in to the room but stood at the door and proceeded to tell off my son.

we left together to do an activity. When I returned an hour later there was a note from reception asking me to contact them immediately. Apparently the guest had made an official complaint about him.

for info. I’m on my own here with my son. No other adults. And he was a bit intimidating

I didn’t. If you read the thread, I did not know it had happened until after the fact when the guest made me aware. I do not need to give my “head a wobble”. We apologised to reception and I removed the ball

It was a football not a basketball and we did apologise.

I know this is AIBU. I already agreed that I was. I have dealt with it. The opinions on this thread have helped me see this situation clearly. There is still no need to be rude.

What sort of parent allows their son to play football indoors - especially in a hotel room !? You have no respect and sound as annoying as your son .

you should not inflict yourself on the other guests in your ‘naice’ hotel .
next time go somewhere more suited to your attitude .

Thanks for the advice. Next time we’ll go to a lower rated hotel and bring our drum kit with us 😂

In all seriousness, never once on this thread have I said that it was acceptable. At the time of the incident I was unaware that he was dribbling a ball in the room. I wasn’t with him at the time and dealt with the situation when I returned

It’s very clear that quite a few posters reading comprehension is poor or they only read the first couple of lines.
Honestly you’re not a bad person and your son isn’t either-he’s a teenage boy,and sometimes teenagers are selfish as they genuinely can’t help it-their are in their own world.You apologised,your son apologised-he stopped bouncing the ball,end of.
the man took it too far after that-and there was never a need to be aggressive

Thank you. You’ve summed it up perfectly ❤️

I can’t believe he did that in the first place though. If he’s not old enough to know that’s unacceptable then he not old enough to be left unsupervised

No indication that it was a joke! I’m not a mind reader (or a sourpuss!)

I would imagine that the man spoke to you first because he assumed the noise was being made by a much younger child. Then you opened the bedroom door and he saw a 15yo and felt it OK to speak to him directly! May have felt like overkill but I would probably have done the same.

I think your reading comprehension is the issue there to be honest. Neither the OP nor her son apologised when the man came to complain to her in person. He was therefore dissatisfied with the outcome of complaining to her directly and potentially concerned that she wouldn’t prevent it happening again. He therefore complained to the hotel, and at that point the OP and her son apologised to the hotel staff. The complainer has done nothing since then so presumably is now satisfied that the OP has belatedly recognised the inappropriateness of her son’s behaviour.

You didn’t apologise to the complainer. You have said this in a previous post.

Footballs are for outside. Always!

I did ask management to apologise to him on our behalf. This happened later when I was fully aware of the facts. Not at the time when I was caught off guard and confronted by an aggressive male at my hotel door.

So don’t you say “son were you kicking your ball around this afternoon and making noise?” “Yes” “well that’s totally unacceptable, don’t do it again, apologise right now to this man” and also apologise yourself?! He went to management because you didn’t do this very obvious thing.

Presumably you're asking what you should do next? Tbh I'd have thought the answer was blindingly obvious.
Meet the man with a member of hotel staff (so you don't feel intimidated as you suggested)
Son to give fulsome apology
Son to provide assurance that he won't play football in his room
You apologise too, for good measure
You drill into your son that football is an outdoor activity. You may be happy for him play in your own home but it's unacceptable in other people's spaces.
Job done.

And I counter complained to management as I was upset at his agressive accusations and intrusion into my privacy

Please see the later posts. The situation has been resolved. I checked out yesterday. Im
assuming the guest either checked out or moved room. Management was very supportive

He shouldn't be playing with a ball inside. Everyone's on holiday, so consideration is the key.

Some people don't deal with confrontation well and can be aggressive. It's not great, but it's done now. Maybe you could ask to be moved to another room.

The man was unreasonable to approach you and your son. Complaining to reception, and allowing them to deal with the situation, would be the acceptable move in my opinion

I'd have done the same, @Bishbashbuush- not least because there's no knowing what reaction you'll get from someone who lets their teenager play football in a hotel room - but for a certainty she'd then have complained that they didn't speak to her first

Really? No one is trying to listen to any repetitive thuds through their wall while on holiday and you can't dictate other people's schedules - again, this is a holiday so extra consideration is needed due to money and AL people are using.

His accusations were correct and the “intrusion” was likely because you made no effort to make the basic enquiries of your son nor to apologise to the man.

I checked out yesterday

His accusations were correct. I did not know the story at the time, and was totally caught off guard.

I did make an effort to find out what was going on in the privacy of my own room without a stranger standing over us.
His accusations were delivered in a confrontational, aggressive and intimidating manner. The intrusion was to stand at the door of my room to aggressively confront my son

I did apologise via management. It was in no one’s best interest for me to approach him at a later date.

None of that was unacceptable. It's unacceptable to play with a ball in a hotel, that has outside space. All this softly softly just isn't the real world. People go on holiday, have a drink and like an afternoon nap. Your son had infringed on him, all afternoon and is old enough to be told. He didn't know that you were checking out, you could be inflicting it on someone else.

Hey all, thanks for all the helpful comments, and for helping me see the situation from both sides.
We've checked out and are heading home. Situation done and dusted. I won’t comment again, however tempting, as all has been said already.