To think Jools has the perfect life

[Theyretryingnottolaughonthismorning]

Jools Oliver

Lots of kids, with partner since very young, lots of money, beautiful home.
I realise no one's life is perfect, but it seems ideal. Found love early, no rubbish men or heartbreak or loneliness of being alone and struggling. loads of kids and a loving, large family there as you get older, no money worries or having to work unless you want to, amazing countryside home

Am envious!

Hes rather annoying and loads of children is my idea of hell.

Nope, my ideal life involves keeping my privacy, thanks!

And YABU for confusing someone’s carefully curated media persona with their reality.

I think the quality of someone's life is largely in how good their closest relationships are... at least for me. And that's something we really can't tell from the outside.

I think her life looks great for her but it is not for me so I would not be envious of her.

I’m the same as the quoted poster. Love my job, love my role as a mother and wife the way I have created them. I’m rarely envious of other people’s lives because I’d choose mine over them.

Loads of kids sounds like a nightmare to me! One was quite enough thank you!

I suppose they are like any other family with all the ups and downs it brings. Money and big houses don't take away worry and stress that children bring with them and husbands to be fair. I'm sure Jools went to uni and now works as a midwife. I like Jamie and Jools they seem a normal couple who have worked hard and probably made sacrifices along the way for everything they have now. Good luck to them I say.

All the kids have SEN though which can’t be easy.

More kids is generally more worries: SEN, MH, jobs, breakups, never moving out etc....
Even for the rich.

There are two books you'll never read:
One is The Book of LIfe
the other is
The Book of Someone Else's Marriage...

I suspect this too - a great life on paper isn’t always what it seems - but then again it may be fab and he’s an easy going cheery guy to live with -who knows! My mum once said - at least a guy who is hard going but rich brings ‘options in life and choices ’ to the table and ‘annoyances in comfort’ and she had a point albeit a bit mercenary

None of us know what her life is actually like.
I certainly wouldn't want all those children, and having to play second fiddle to an Alpha Male workaholic.
But each to their own....

Anybody's could sadly, but she still has what looks like many great things

He seems ok?? Together since teens

You are missing that some of us don't think the tradwife lifestyle is a great thing.

huh? so could anyone else's?

It would still be a lot easier if you are very ill to have (presumably), a supportive family, enough money not to worry about working and paying the mortgage off, likely private health care to get treated faster, cleaners, etc. Rather than having to do all that while being ill.

Money doesn't make you happy but it does make being miserable easier to bear.

Also even if (obviously hoping not) she did become very ill now, many people would happily exchange 40-50 very good years with almost every luxury and happiness, than 80 years of miserable poverty.

Yes exactly! With all that money and ability to outsource if wanted (I wouldn't get a nanny and can't see her doing it, but may be wrong) it makes life a lot easier.

She actually said in an interview she regretted getting drawn into modelling and not training as a midwife when she was young. I believe she was nearly 50 when she trained so that’s a large chunk of her life she didn’t really have a particularly meaningful career.

she’s also written about her numerous fertility problems and miscarriages which is very sad and nothing to be envious of. In fact I think I read they had tried ivf for a sixth child when they must have both been into their 40s which does hint at some lack of fulfilment with life.

Yes, I can't see him having an affair, I think he's just so passionate about his work

Oh, I believe you as I agree! Fabulous academic career and she's a Trustee of the British Museum (and she doesn't worry about her hair)!

This is a weird thread.

No of course not, but the other parts of her life are things many many people don't have

If she's happy, good for her. Marrying young and having lots of children is not how I would have liked my life to go, but I'm not her.

I'd take her financial situation, though 😅

True! But if she’s at home she won’t have outsourced childcare (I don’t think - doesn’t seem the type) and I can’t imagine being at home with 4 kids being that much fun. Though she does seem the earth mother type so maybe she was happy with it all.

The question is OP, what can you do in your life to improve it, given that her's looks good to you.

Perhaps it's not possible anymore to find love early, and avoid all rubbish men or heartbreak or loneliness of being alone and struggling. But maybe you could, or have, worked through issues and got yourself in a position to minimise the risk of this going forward?

Maybe you can't now have loads of kids and a loving, large family, but can you extend your feidnship group or deepen existing frienships?

Could you get financial advice to minimise money worries, or reduce your work/aim for early retirement? Can you move to the countryside, or visit it more often?

Tana Ramsey is also training as a midwife which is interesting.
Jools wanted more kids I believe, she spoke on a podcast about trying for more and having miscarriages in lockdown.
I hope Jools is happy, she certainly seems to be and anything she’s not happy with she has the money to change. And the house! Gorgeous!