Altercation in carpark

[Icecreamsundaz]

I was in a supermarket carpark, I had put my baby in her carseat and had just loaded my groceries in the boot. A car parked in the parent and child space next to me and an older couple got out, early 70s I would guess, able bodied, no kids with them
I said "sorry do you realise thats s parent and child space" and I pointed to the markings.
Well his response was very rude in tone "I came here to do my shopping, not to dance around" ?? "It should be first come first served " and they stormed off. I was a bit taken aback, I said loudly but they were a bit away at this point so not sure if they heard me "god id hate to be so ignorant". I took a picture of their car. Not really sure what I was going to do with it, thinking I would think about it and perhaps report to management. I got into my car
The next he was at my window "you took a photo, its illeageal to take photos of other people's property, delete it." I ensured my doors were locked, he stood behind my car so I couldn't reverse out, she was at my windscreen taking photos of me. Eventually they moved and I got out.
Maybe I shouldn't have said anything but there were loads of other places they could have parked but the parent and child spaces are limited. Its very frustrating when I've all my kids and can't find a free parent and child space because people like this who dont need them take them and they don't give a shit

I had a similar experience when my children were young. I had just had a baby and had a toddler and my 90 year old grandmother with me. A woman pulled into the last child parking space in front of me and got out to walk into the shop without a child, I wound down my window and calmly pointed out that the bay she had parked in was designated for parents with young children. She came up to my window and started to shout and swear at us. It really upset my my toddler and my grandmother.

Those designated spaces are there for child safety, not just parents convenience. It can be quite difficult and dangerous trying to keep young children safe in a busy supermarket carpark with shopping etc. I think you did the right thing in calling it out.

You’d be surprised how many times some self appointed car park police demand just that.

if there’s a genuine reason why do people who park in them (without a child) always get so defensive?

Because they're fed up of noses poking into their business?

Their choice of parking space has zero to do with anyone who doesn't work there.

The don't owe them an explanation.

If the spaces aren’t legally enforceable why on earth would you think a store manager would be within their rights to ban shoppers ‘abusing’ them ? There is no legal basis on which to do so.

They were wrong parking there BUT why get into a confrontation over it especially when you have a baby with you? You will never get anything positive by challenging a stranger who could be mentally unwell, unpredictable or carry a weapon and put you and your baby at risk of hall.

Its annoying but just move on with life and in the bigger scheme of things it really doesn’t matter.

These people are laughing at you.

My niece is disabled, and I’ve lost count of the times she has been challenged by strangers and expected to prove it. She has literally had to lift her top to shut down someone challenging her disability even after explaining, people still expect “proof” because they decide she doesn’t look disabled enough.

You make it sound like a harmless 30 second explanation. It isn’t. It’s humiliating, intrusive and exhausting. It reminds her that she is different, leaves her embarrassed and can ruin her entire day.

Disabled people shouldn’t have to publicly disclose, explain or prove their disabilities simply because a stranger has decided they don’t look disabled enough. The answer is to mind your own business, rather than expecting vulnerable people to justify themselves to you.

Your only mistake was not reversing over him. I have no patience for people who are arseholes like this.

my MO is to approach them, look concerned and ask if I can help them as they must be really worried. When they look confused I add ‘to help you look for your missing child of course, when did you last see them? They can’t have got far as you have only just parked up’. They get the point and usually swear at me.

I think rather than swear at you, I'd be worried about the state of your mental health, and probably mention it to customer services.

Genuinely.

They shout at me before I’ve even placed my badge (it lives in the glove box because they get stolen) or got out of the car

Oh @SickandTiredofEverything you poor thing. Life must be a battle!

I have similar issues because I am disabled and have a Blue Badge! Ignorance is no excuse for bloody laziness and feeling entitled, elderly people are the worst!

No it isn't. OP was parked. She was trying to stop other people from parking without knowing how badly they needed a wider space.

OP you picked a fight and you got one.

I often park in the P&C spaces in my local Aldi as they’re always empty in the middle of the day. 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s mainly because DH is in his 70’s and can easily get breathless during a shopping trip so I like to park near to the entrance. If you said anything to me I wouldn’t bother trying to pacify you but I would likely ignore you.

This.

Unfortunately, OP, I suspect most of the snarky replies are from people closer in age to the selfish arseholes than you, and just as entitled.

They wont change, don't let it get to you.

Unlike the parent and child spaces which in my local supermarket are enforced with fines, you could just park over two spaces. There is literally no legislation about this. Just park over the line. Problem solved. And since you have a blue badge, anyone that did say anything (nobody will) you can explain that you would have taken a Bb space but they were full.

It's a parking space. I think supermarkets should do away with P&C spaces and just make all spaces bigger (and maybe add some more BB spaces). because it always seems to cause problems.
I also think more cars should have sliding back doors. Our car does and it's much easier to get the kids in and out of the car.
They were twats but they aren't going to change now.

She really should not entertain people, with their nonsense, like that. It will chip away at her own self esteem. I don't know, who these people think they are, expecting a medical rundown, in public.

If someone's moral compass told them it was ok to park in a parent and child space without a child, I doubt anyone arguing with them will change their mind. It's not about whether I, you, the OP or anyone else is happy with them.... they clearly don't care, and they are legally fine, so there's nothing to get them to move.

Id say "relax, hes in the boot" 😬

I think you were both very childish and rude. I would never confront a stranger with any of my children present.

Why is it not ok to park in disabled bays as an able bodied person, that is universally frowned upon so I don’t get why designated spaces for parents is any different? Just because it’s not illegal doesn’t mean it’s ok

There's a thread from a month ago about someone who did this with a wheelchair user in her car. Not only did she have harassment from the parking of another driver, she got a whole load more from posters on the forum!

Love this