Teacher pulled my daughter's hair, do I take it further?

[RingsLikeTinnitis]

So yesterday my daughter (14 year old. In year 10 at school) came home and told me the PE teacher pulled her hair. It was a supply teacher and is covering short term because the usual teacher has had surgery. Apparently she was "using my daughter as an example" of why they needed to put their hair up for PE. She had said something along the lines of "what happens if someone goes like this?" And then fully yanked my daughter's hair. It wasn't a gentle pull, it hurt her and she was quite upset about it.

Anyway I was picking her up early at 10 this morning for an appointment so I spoke to someone about it at the same time. The person I spoke to was the safeguarding lead and already knew about the incident because my daughter had reported it to another teacher and a few of the other students had also said something to other teachers too. She said that she will be having a strong word with this supply teacher and my daughter should come straight to her if she has any more concerns/problems with her. She's probably going to be teaching for the next couple of weeks.

Do you think you'd be happy with the schools response to this?

In my perspective, the point you’re missing is that she doesn’t need to be a golden girl. She could be the worse behaved kid in the school. That doesn’t justify the behaviour of the teacher. The old saying “two wrongs don’t make a right” comes to mind. And from the original post it was clear that the teachers had had several accounts of the situation and by their reaction they had deemed them credible ones - hence why they reacted. So from the beginning, your question was irrelevant. There’s nothing wrong with admitting you didn’t think it through (if that’s what you feel)

@RingsLikeTinnitis Wait until you find out about the injuries that 11+ year old boys sustain when they are forced to play rugby by schools.

What do you mean? This post doesn't mention any issue with her behaviour at all.

What in the wildest tenuous link does this have to do with the OPs post?

This 100%. The teacher acted in a way that she knew might hurt a student. She should be in serious trouble. Plus for what real purpose? Because a group of secondary school pupils wouldn't have understood "if your hair gets trapped it will hurt."? Yeah right. This was NOT necessary to make her point at all, so what was it? Because she enjoys hurting students....? She needs removing from teaching.

Your daughters behaviour is completely irrelevant. This is unacceptable and I would take it as far as I possibly could until a response is satisfactory. This was assualt.

I think it's fine. Personally, I would have asked to have a short meeting with the supply teacher and get to the bottom of what happened!

By my experience with secondary school it will get swept under the carpet.

You raised it - I doubt it will happen again, I would leave it now. It’s obviously not great but it does not need any action further than what has already been done .

Needs returned to wherever she came from.
Nasty bitch.
Teachers these days arent quite right.

Ouch. It shouldn't matter what her behaviour is like, it's so unprofessional and probably actual assault to pull a students hair.
Terrible that your first response is to look for a chance to victim blame.

I think the safeguarding teacher dealt with it well and I'd be happy with her response

The point is that hair pulling is a minor complaint compared to what pupils have to go through in PE anyway...

As part of my role we do ‘break away’ training. One scenario is breaking free if you are having your hair pulled. While practicing we ask permission to touch our colleague and then place a fist (no hair in our hand) on their hair. We never demonstrate or practice by actually pulling each others hair!

Was dd the only one who had hair that ‘could’ have been pulled? Did the teacher say that she was going to do it and did she ask your dd?

I think for now I would be happy with how it’s been dealt with but would expect dd to receive an apology and would keep an eye on it.

I would absolutely be demanding that teacher is gone. We no longer live in an era where teachers get to hurt the kids no matter what point they think they’re making.

She wasn’t trying to humiliate her, she was just demonstrating which in turn may have humiliated her. It doesn’t take much to humiliate a 14 yo girl in front of their peers.

Of course. She was maybe a bit heavy handed. Not that its right, but i'd leave it. We all make mistakes. If she was four it would be a bit different.

So because boys play rugby, op shouldnt be arsed that a teacher pulled her DDs hair?

Only on MN would a teacher assaulting a child be met with questions about the child’s behaviour. Pulling a child’s hair is battery under UK law. A teacher cannot put their hands on a child — “demonstration” or not.

God that is horrible. I’m genuinely shocked at the number of people saying to sweep this under the rug. This woman has, unprovoked, assaulted a 14yo girl. Her being the teacher is an aggravating not mitigating factor.

I would absolutely be telling the school that either the teacher goes or the police are getting a call. Frankly I’d probably call them anyway, someone who assaults a teenager has no place teaching.

Hope your DD is doing ok. On a practical note I would also tell her something I learned as a kid with long hair - if someone/something pulls your hair, the best way to stop it hurting is to grab your own hair higher up. Also works if you’re brushing out knots. Not something she should have to worry about from a teacher though!!

In my workplace we're not allowed to touch another person without asking their permission

Hurting someone is abuse

I'd expect an apology directly to your daughter from the supply. Until then, keep her off lessons with that supply

How do you think the school would react if you told them tomorrow you are going in to pull the supply teachers hair to "demonstrate" how dangerous it can be to pull other's hair?

Would they tell you that you aren't allowed to assault a staff member? Would they ring the police on you if you actually did that? Why was a staff member allowed to assault a child under their care? Why didn't they ring the police when it was reported to them?

Precisely! It’s like when a judge asks a rape victim what she was wearing.

My understanding is that the report to the school should have kicked off their safeguarding process, investigation, etc.

How the fuck do you know?