Swimming parties for little children are the absolute worst kind of party

[Tittie]

I love swimming, whether it’s swimming lengths alone, swimming with the kids, lazing in the pool on holiday. It’s my favourite exercise and I regularly hire the local small, WARM, private pools for family to play. HOWEVER. Swimming parties for younger children are the absolute worst and I think it’s so inconsiderate of parents to organise them. We have been invited to a Y1 age swimming party where parents must also be in the water. It’s so awful on multiple counts and I wish they’d be banned!

1. our leisure centre is freezing. The water is freezing. The air is freezing. You can’t get in and warm up with proper swimming or do lengths or anything because the kids just want to stand in the shallow bit and splash
2. I don’t want to hang out nearly naked with dads I don’t know
3. The leisure centre smells or urine and I don’t want verrucas
4. Many parents feel very uncomfortable standing around awkwardly in swimwear with parents they don’t know
5. Pressure to shave and sort bikini line, lest the other parents bitch about you (I’ve seen that happen)
6. Not all of us have spare adults to go in our place

These parents do swimming parties every year (even when their kid was 3!!) and they get family help so they don’t need to get in. They’re not even ‘making the memories’ with their kids. Party child mum is always beautifully made up, meanwhile we will all look sodden and bare faced, stinking of chlorine.

I have taken the eldest to a Y5(ish) party before, at a shallow pool. We didn’t have to get in, we watched carefully and had nice chats. Marvellous.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk and if you’re thinking of doing this for your kids, don’t. There are hundreds of other possibilities that children and grown ups alike will love. Drop offs preferred 😂

Hahahaha!!

This, exactly

Thankfully when mine went to swimming parties the pool was otherwise closed and you didn’t have to get in the water with them!

Just don’t go 😆

I loved swimming parties as a kid, but wouldn't do one as I get they're not inclusive-some parents and kids couldn't go.
Have attended some, and couldn't care less if any of the adults judge me with dripping messy hair after.

I was spared the ordeal due to a child who seemed to develop rabies at the thought.

I eventually managed to get her to successfully stand in the little pool instead of attempt to flay me alive once she was about 9, by which point they'd gone out of fashion.