Swimming parties for little children are the absolute worst kind of party

[Tittie]

I love swimming, whether it’s swimming lengths alone, swimming with the kids, lazing in the pool on holiday. It’s my favourite exercise and I regularly hire the local small, WARM, private pools for family to play. HOWEVER. Swimming parties for younger children are the absolute worst and I think it’s so inconsiderate of parents to organise them. We have been invited to a Y1 age swimming party where parents must also be in the water. It’s so awful on multiple counts and I wish they’d be banned!

1. our leisure centre is freezing. The water is freezing. The air is freezing. You can’t get in and warm up with proper swimming or do lengths or anything because the kids just want to stand in the shallow bit and splash
2. I don’t want to hang out nearly naked with dads I don’t know
3. The leisure centre smells or urine and I don’t want verrucas
4. Many parents feel very uncomfortable standing around awkwardly in swimwear with parents they don’t know
5. Pressure to shave and sort bikini line, lest the other parents bitch about you (I’ve seen that happen)
6. Not all of us have spare adults to go in our place

These parents do swimming parties every year (even when their kid was 3!!) and they get family help so they don’t need to get in. They’re not even ‘making the memories’ with their kids. Party child mum is always beautifully made up, meanwhile we will all look sodden and bare faced, stinking of chlorine.

I have taken the eldest to a Y5(ish) party before, at a shallow pool. We didn’t have to get in, we watched carefully and had nice chats. Marvellous.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk and if you’re thinking of doing this for your kids, don’t. There are hundreds of other possibilities that children and grown ups alike will love. Drop offs preferred 😂

I’d have been busy that day

Don’t go then. Simple.

So dont go?

It sounds like being at school and lying about being on your period to get out of it. Sorry miss, I can’t go, it’s my time of the month!

None of my DC have been invited to a swimming party thank goodness but I’d absolutely despise having my cozzie on around the school run parents.

A swimming party for a yr1 child is just ludicrous. Not a chance I’d go. My DH might have been willing but nope, certainly not me. Those parents are bonkers.

I hated attending them but as a party organiser it's really easy and kids love it. So I can see why people do it.

Another one wo is very glad swimming parties aren't a 'thing' round here, they sound like a massive faff at that age.

Although we often bump into various school parents at the local pool during the weekend family swim sessions (and occasionally the teachers too!), so I've more or less got over the swimwear aspect.

DD went to a few pool parties when she was in upper primary but they were drop off only thank goodness! No way would I be going in the pool with all the other parents - just make an excuse and say no

My exact thought!!

Yes, that’s horrendous. My DD is desperate for a swimming party but it’s not happening until she’s 10/11 so the kids can swim themselves and sort themselves out after.

+1 for, if you're still actually going to go (don't!) get a swimming costume set with long shorts and a long sleeved top (and a bikini bra top for support that you need not show outside the changing room). Much more decent and much warmer. Often useful in the summer too for outdoor swimming as you need much less suncream. You can get fairly nice such sets from amazon for not too much money.

Also, get your child a big towel poncho thing that goes over their head. When you get out, off with their cozzie and on with their poncho towel. Then let them sit in it while you get dry and dressed. Mummy better do herself first so her hair doesn't drip on your dry clothes, you know.

I get it's still horrid but it'll be less horrid with these hacks.

I never accepted those invitations.
My children never had any interest either.
Thankfully they were never popular either.

Swimming parties in general aren't a bad idea, but your examples are definitely a bad idea! DS has always wanted a swimming party but, unfortunately, very few children in his class have ever known how to swim, so he haven't had one. The swimming parties near us are great though - the pool is only for party guests; it is full of water toys and soft water slides, the lifeguards are responsible for the children and no parents are expected (or even allowed) in the water. It's drop and go.

You get invited to lots of swimming parties for small children?

That seems unusual, most swimming parties here (which are still really quite rare) only happen after age 8 when pool requires less supervision. Usually it seems once one kid in the class has had one the 'need' for others to have one seems to wear off among the other kids.

When we had a swimming party (DS had asked for years) no parents needed to go in. We just had 2 adults who could get in if needed (but didn't need too) and the lifeguard. Over my dead body would I be wandering around in swimwear in front of my kids school friends parents and other mams checked and double checked they definitely didn't have to before RSVPing so a pretty common feeling I imagine. I don't think anyone would have come if they had had to get in.

Has anyone actually had a verruca since they got rid of the ironically named verruca baths? I haven't seen or heard of them this millennium.

total invasion of privacy. I’d not be delighted and in y1 at least you can just say no thank you we have a plan for that day already. child probably won’t be a friend for life!

I feel for you OP!
Drop and go - sure thing. Parents in the water - hell no!!!

It’s terrible until they’re in year 5 and can just go independently without a parent. I’ve only had one for a younger child and they did actually have enough family members to avoid needing to ask too many parents to join so that was fine but I don’t think anyone loves it as a party concept for younger kids.

We were invited to one in Y1, child could swim a few strokes and loved the water so I said yes without really thinking it through. Due to age of kids it was parents in the pool.

Couldn't look one of the school dads in the eye for weeks after seeing him in his budgie snugglers . . .

No way! No swimming parties until the kids are allowed in the pool (8+?) by themselves, and adults can watch from the benches.

My granddaughter in year 1 has just been invited to a reception child’s swimming party. My dgd won’t even have lessons without her mum being in the pool with her and even then takes ages to even let go of her!
My daughter is dreading it. I’ve said just decline but she feels bad doing that especially as she didn’t invite child to my dgd recent birthday. I’m sooo glad I’m past all this party politics!

My DD used to have a boy in her class whose mum was a teacher at the school - I remember her telling me once that her DS wa desperate for a swimming party but that she'd compromised and said he could go swimming with his cousins for his birthday as there was no way she'd be getting into get swimming costume in front of a load of parents 😆 - can't say I blame her tbh!

Completely agree. Twas ever thus. My DC are in their mid-20s and I still remember the dread which accompanied an invite to a swimming party at the local Leisure Centre.

I would definitely not attend, and I can usually be persuaded to just about anything for my dc. I’m also the anxious person that will end up feeling responsible for the unsupervised dc whose dps are off chatting with their backs turned,

I live in a country with long hot summers where private pools are commonplace as are pool parties. They are almost always lovely!

What you describe sounds hellish and I simply wouldn't go, even if it meant bribing my dc if they wanted to go.

There can be nothing remotely pleasant about a freezing cold indoor pool party.

YANBU!

A lot of the objections seem to be about bodies and swimwear. Honestly, no one is going to go into shock if you have a bit of a tummy or haven't waxed your bikini line or whatever. Don't let these insecurities stop you and your kids doing things.